Famous People, Famous Sayings

Famous people, famous sayings

#300. WHO: Roland Soong
TOPIC: The Famous People, Famous Sayings page
WHAT HE WROTE: "When I first began this page, I thought that when I reached the 100 mark, I would probably retire the web site because of the lack of interest and materials. Now we have reached 300 and still going strong. Amazing!"

#299. WHO: Jeff Kisseloff
SITUATION: This web site is known for anarchist tendencies and the penchant for dispensing politically incorrect advice. When Jeff first wrote us, "So I guess I should pay my 1998 dues. Do you have any idea where I should send them, and how much I owe?", we replied "Don't even worry about paying the club dues. Someone is responsible for contacting you. It is their problem, not yours."
WHAT HE WROTE: "I guess you're not familiar with the term Jewish guilt."

#298. WHO: Samantha Peale
SITUATION: When she ran the second half of the 1998 New York City Marathon as a training run, she happened to spot the web photographer perched on a lamppost near 103rd Street and Fifth Avenue.
WHAT SHE SAID: "I will get by without him seeing me. I can do it!"
COMMENT: What a most peculiar sense of priority! (see comment in #296 below)

#297. WHO: Scott Willett
WHEN: November 2nd, 1998, interview by Dr. Ian Smith on WNBC Channel 4 Late News
WHAT HE SAID: "To finish an ironman, you have to be mentally strong."
COMMENT: Straight from the little red book of The Collected Clichés of Chairman Scott ...

#296. WHO: Eve Kaplan
WHAT SHE WROTE: "I have made our web site the envy of all my former Boston Running Club teammates --- by forcing them to check it out on a near-daily basis."
COMMENT: No doubt, after looking at the information on this web site, they will come to recognize that there is a causal relationship between the ascent of the web site and the decline of the running performances of the club members.

#295: WHO: Carsten Strandlod
WHEN: Bronx Half Marathon, 1998
SITUATION: As Carsten ran up a largely deserted Grand Concourse on this early Sunday morning, he saw two little boys sitting and watching the race. One of them turned to the other and said, "I know everyone who has run by."
WHAT CARSTEN SAID: "That's a lie!"
COMMENT: Carsten, how do you know that for sure? How do you know that they were not members of our Global Surveillance System (TM)?

#294: WHO: Mike Batista
WHEN: November 1st, 1998 New York City Marathon day
WHERE: East 90th Street and First Avenue
SITUATION: In response to the question, "Your name came up just the other day. You are the legend in the club. So what are you up?", he showed the lit cigarette in his hand ...
WHAT HE SAID: "I've been smoking cigarettes, and doing other bad stuff. But I will come back one day."

#293. WHO: Ramon Bermo
SUBJECT: His weekday morning routine
WHAT HE SAID: "I get into the office, I have my coffee, the newspaper and the web site to start my day ..."
COMMENT: To be more precise, he holds the coffee in his left hand, his eyes are on the newspaper and his right hand is clicking madly at the REFRESH button on our home page."

#292. WHO: Sylvie Kimché
WHEN: October 29th, 1998
WHAT SHE E-MAILED: "I want to thank you for making the Central Park Track Club web site the most entertaining web site that I visit (which is not to say much as I only visit 2 other web sites - USA TODAY to see if the market is going up or down and Abercrombie & Fitch because it's my company's home page - not because I'm so stupid that I don't know how to find other sites, it's just that I don't have the time! )
COMMENT: Gee, that was nice but we were more pleased by her additional comment: "I want to thank you for ALWAYS spelling my family name properly with an accent aigu on the 'e'. I admire you so much more because I have no idea myself how to add the accent on my name!" Yes, it pleases us when the little things get noticed.

#291: WHO: Ross Galitsky
SUBJECT: His choice of observation post on the 1998 New York Marathon course
WHAT HE SAID: "I don't want to be at the 23 mile mark. At that point, the runners have no sense of humor. You can't say anything to them."

#290: WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: October 22nd, 1998 road workout, ten days before the New York City Marathon
SITUATION: We had predicted that this would be a nine mile run, divided in three segments of 3 miles. That was exactly what happened. An astonished Edwin Fajardo exclaimed, "Hey, it is exactly as you predicted!" Apart from the fact that we are prescient, we also had inside information from Tony Ruiz after last week's workout:
WHAT HE SAID: "We have done this for the last seven or eight years, before the Boston and the New York City marathons. Until you guys screw up, there is no reason to change it."

#289: WHO: Norman Goluskin
WHEN: October 22nd, 1998 road workout
SITUATION: Fritz Mueller did not think he wanted to run fast this night. So he started out slowly on his own before everybody else. Before long, Norman Goluskin caught up to him and conned him into picking up the pace. Three miles later, a panting Fritz said, now with Norman having gone way ahead, "He tricked me!" When he finished, an elated Norman asked the coach,
WHAT HE SAID: "So ... (pause) ... do you think I am ready to run a marathon?"
COMMENT: Whipping the legendary Fritz can be such a great confidence builder.

#288. WHO: 'Kelly Brown'
DATE: October 28th, 1998
SUBJECT: Tri-geeks
WHAT HE (note: we emphasize, not SHE) WROTE: "As an avid runner, I am disappointed with your all too frequent commentary on, and therefore legitimization of the thoroughly self-indulgent "It's all about me" sport of triathlon. If one is a "never-gonna-be" in one sport, why show inadequacies in two more activities? Until you include the word triathlon in your club name, the activities of your obviously too-numerous subversive "I'm not a real runner" members should not be recognised, unless of course it brings shame upon their third-assed efforts at running. If I had paid my dues as a legit member of your fine club, I would ask for a prompt refund."

RESPONSE: Our exact sentiments ... however, we would not have characterized our frequent commentaries about tri-geeks as being supportive and caring, and not even neutral and value-free. But the marginalized subjects of our frequent trigeek-bashing tirades seem to find our diatribes quite amusing. Perhaps we should consult our resident psychologist member J.P. Cheuvront (member of NYU Triathlon Club) for some insight.

ANNOYMOUS QUERY: Who is Kelly Brown? and why is this person saying these terrible things?
ANSWER: Kelly Brown is an innocent person whose computer account at the athletic department of a large educational institution south of midtown was misappropriated by a co-worker whose multi-sport activities have been reported in great detail on this web site and who is hoping (in vain, we might add) that this fictional letter would deter further coverage. Now where were we before we got interrupted? Oh, yes, about the said imposter's marathon run in the ironman triathlon down south. We understand that he took two bathroom breaks of 2 minutes and 4 minutes respectively. Without those missing six minutes, he would have catapulted himself from 10th place to 4th place. Has he been ignoring his toilet-training?

#287. WHO: John Kenney
SITUATION: David Pullman was getting a lot of press coverage (Business Magazine, Time Magazine, Bloomberg News, Euromoney, CNBC, Daily News, etc), some of which were tracked down and reported on our On The Web page. The web reporter complained that Dave was a "one-man tidal wave of news items --- it is impossible to keep up with him!"
WHAT HE WROTE: "Tsunami even!"

#286. WHO: Ramon Bermo
SITUATION: On October 23rd, 1998, the following message was posted on this web site.

Enquiring minds want to know which running coach made one of his runners up-chuck in the middle of practice?

Hint # 1: No, it was not Tony Ruiz
Hint # 2: No, it was not Brian Denman
Hint # 3: Yes, the running coach is a Central Park Track Club member
Hint # 4: No, the practice in question was not a CPTC-sanctioned session
Hint # 5: The runner in question is not a member of CPTC, but belongs to a running club affiliated with a local educational institution.
Hint # 6: The running coach works for a data processing company during his spare time.
Hint # 7: Need we say more?

WHAT RAMON E-MAILED: "What do you want to know? My name or the name of the 'person who gave a 120%' at that workout.....?"

POSTLUDE (October 29th, 1998)
RAMON: "I didn't know what you wanted to find out."
WEBMASTER: "Ramon, we didn't need you to tell us anything. We already knew, otherwise we would not have posted it. Get it?"

#285: WHO: Jud Santos
WHEN: October 25th, 1998, after the Not Quite The New York City Marathon 5K Run
WHAT HE SAID: "Today was the first time that I ever elbowed someone. (pause for reflection). It felt good."
ANNOYMOUS RESPONSE: "Remember the expression on mousy Dustin Hoffman's face after he blew away all the big bad bullies in the movie Straw Dogs?"

#284: WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: October 27th, 1998 pre-marathon track workout
SITUATION: In response to the question as to whether he will be on the right or left side of the street at his observation post in Marcus Garvey Park.
WHAT HE SAID: "When you reach the 22nd mile point, you are not going to be able to tell left from right."

#283. WHO: David Pullman
WHEN: October 27th, 1998 workout at East River Park
WHAT HE SAID: "This was the first time that I arrived on time for a workout. Unfortunately, it was also the final workout this year."

#282. WHO: Unknown runner
WHEN: The Not Quite The New York City Marathon 5K, October 25th, 1998
SITUATION: Jim Olson (still recovering from injury, operation, etc.) was running against the flow of the race and said that this story was too good to pass up. Near the last quarter of the pack, a large male racer was exhorting/ admonishing two or three apparent lesser runners who seemed to be under his guidance. The tenor of his voice was filled with authority (as the coach who knows), as he drove them onward at about an 8:30 pace.
WHAT HE SHOUTED: "Pace!, Pace! You must pace yourself....(pause) ... One tree at a time!"

#281. WHO: Carmine Petracca
WHEN: The Not Quite The New York City Marathon 5K, October 25th, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "I don't know how well I will do today, because I was up last night smoking cigarettes with my brother."

#280. WHO: Bola Awofeso
WHEN: The Not Quite The New York City Marathon 5K, October 25th, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "When I arrived there, there were just a few out-of-shape people there. I thought that I might even win this race. Unfortunately, as someone told me later, I had forgotten that Daylight Savings Time came into effect last night and I was one hour early."

#279. WHO: J.P. Cheuvront
WHEN: Upon reading Randy Ehrlich's announcement of his new medical practice on this web site.
WHAT HE SAID: "I didn't know you can post self-advertisements. I guess I better send in my application form then."

#278. WHO: Ross Galitsky
SITUATION: This web site is known for being able to unearth facts about Central Park Track Club, such as race results in the boonies as well as extracurricular activities. There are many ways to find things out. Sometimes, even the direct approach will work. But this is Ross's response to a head-on challenge.
WHAT HE SAID: "I just have nothing to hide anymore!"
COMMENT: Sorry, we don't believe a word of it. For Ross, the pleasure has always been in the game. Those words are just the way of the Russian chess grandmaster signalling something.

#277. WHO: Kevin Arlyck
WHEN: October 20th, 1998 track workout
SITUATION: In response to the question, "Are you a marathon guy?"
WHAT HE SAID: (pause) "I am running my first marathon, but I wouldn't call myself a marathon guy."
COMMENT: Probably said in deference to Alan Ruben, who was in the immediate vicinity.

#276. WHO: Jeff Kisseloff
SUBJECT: The reason why he skipped the awards ceremony at the 1998 Kurt Steiner XC 5K, in which he finished third-place in his age group
WHAT HE WROTE: "I had to get back to work. Plus, if I put any more cheap metal in the house, the United Mine Workers are gonna be knocking down my doors with their shovels."

#275. WHO: Stacy Creamer
SUBJECT: Instructions to apartment-sitter Bill Dunlop
WHAT SHE SAID: "You can leave the key at Healthy Bagel & Things. Tell them that it is for Stacy and Stuart. Wait, if they don't know our first names, just say that it is for the sourdough raisin bagel runners. They will know."
COMMENT: So now the secret super runner diet has been revealed to the public.

#274. WHO: Brian Barry
WHEN: 1998 Kurt Steiner Cross Country 5K race
WHERE: Van Cortlandt Park
WHAT HE SAID: "This place looks a little bit different from the last time I ran here. That was in 1973, when I was a high school freshman."

#273. WHO: Sid Howard
WHEN: After the Bedford-Stuyvesant Restoration Corporation 10K of 1998, where he was the first male 55-59 in a time of 39:39
WHAT HE SAID: "There is running after 50."
COMMENT: Soon to be adapted to "There is running after 60", possibly even "Running gets even better at 60."

#272. WHO: Michele Tagliati
SITUATION: At the October 8th road workout, the regular web reporter was absent but filed these betting odds for a selected number of people to show:

Tony Ruiz (he is the coach and he has to be there, if only to tell people that the workout is off; unless of course he delegates someone else (Jud Santos?) to do the dirty job)
Alan Ruben --- 1-to-2 (he likes to listen to those jokes about British weather)
Audrey Kingsley --- 2-to-1 (nothing is going to stop her)
Stacy Creamer --- 4-to-1 (the only reason that she would show is to see who else is there)
Jud Santos --- 9999-to-1 (once upon a time, at the Philadelphia Distance Run, he elected to stay in the hotel bed when he saw the rain outside; however, he may be lured by the glamor of being the substitute coach)
Carsten Strandlod --- 9999-to-1 (insider information --- our Global Surveillance System (TM) says that he is running a half-marathon in Denmark this weekend)

WHAT EYEWITNESS MICHELE WROTE: "Your bets were all on target. Tony, Alan, Audrey and Stacy were there and Jud and Carsten were not."

POSTDICTION: We should have known better! We should have picked Stuart Calderwood to show too, because Stacy Creamer was going to there and, more importantly, Alan Ruben was going to be there too.

#271. WHO: Carsten Strandlod
WHEN: October 13th, 1998 track workout
SITUATION: Carsten was in Denmark over the weekend, and even ran a half-marathon in Helsingør. When he returned to New York, he went to the track workout but felt very tired.
WHAT HE SAID: "There are five hours of sleep missing somewhere."

#270. WHO: Stacy Creamer
SITUATION: Stacy went to watch the 1998 Chicago Marathon in person. After the race, she scrupulously copied down the times and places of her CPTC teammates (Rae Baymiller, Kim Mannen, Eve Kaplan and Jiyon Lee). When she returned to New York the next day, she was ready to e-mail the results to this web site. But when she logged on, she found that the results have been posted already.
WHAT SHE SAID: "I couldn't contribute to the Global Surveillance System (tm), as much as I try."

$269. WHO: David Pullman
WHEN: October 13th, 1998 track workout
SUBJECT: Lack of support and help from teammates
WHAT HE SAID: "So I got here late. But shouldn't there be someone else who got here as late as I did, so that we can work out together?"
COMMENT: "Paging Dr. John Sargent ... paging Dr. John Sargent ..."

#268. WHO: Jud Santos
SUBJECT: His explanation of why he missed the October 6th, 1998 track workout.
WHAT HE WROTE: "Here is what I did last night, in case anyone would like to do a workout on their own à la Alan Bautista. One hard mile on the reservoir, then 6x that 300-meter hill on the west side trail that goes from around 82rd to 85th (recover back downhill, but no dawdling!), then another hard mile on the reservoir. Total distance (with 3/4-mile warmup and 3/4-mile cooldown): about 7-1/4 miles. 100% of it was off-road, so your legs will thank you for it afterwards. "
DISCLAIMER: "Before you tell me to get a life, please note that I was at Lincoln Center afterwards in a suit attending the 36th New York Film Festival. Oh, I am a sophisticate!"

#267. WHO: Fasil Yilma
SUBJECT: His reason for running the 1998 Norway Run 5K
WHAT HE SAID: "I ran this race because I have a cold."
COMMENT: By way of explanation, he meant that he would have ran the accompanying half-marathon if he did not have the cold. The shorter 5K was a concession to his cold.

#266. WHO: Stuart Calderwood
WHEN: At a gig by his band, the Gutter Poets, on August 20th, 1998, he was asked to give his name to the audience.
WHAT HE SAID (in a British accent): "I don't know. I can't remember. Could it be Alan Ruben?"

#265. WHO: Jud Santos
WHEN: October 2nd, 1998
WHAT HE WROTE: "I would like to lay claim to hit 16000. I got to the bottom of the page and '15999' was just egging me on"

#264. WHO: Alan Ruben
WHEN: October 6th, 1998 track workout
TO WHOM: Rick Shaver, who had just mentioned that he was going for his 22nd NYC Marathon in a row
WHAT HE SAID: "So what was your slowest time?"
COMMENT: We note the odd lack of interest in the fastest time. Can we infer that Alan's evaluation of worth is based upon consistency?
COMMENT: For the record, Rick's slowest time occurred when he passed out at Central Park South from a heatstroke in the 1970's; when he came to, he persuaded the doctor to permit him to walk to the finish for a 3:53 finish. His second slowest time was last year, when he ran 3:35 on zero (yes, ZERO) training after a prolonged injury period. His third slowest time was a rookie debut of 3:06. All the others were under three hours.

#263. WHO: The staff at Mount Sinai Medical Center
TO WHOM: Michele Tagliati, MD
WHEN: The morning after Michele did a 26x200m track workout and came to work with a limp.
WHAT THEY SAID: "Are you sure that running is good for your health?"

#262. WHO: Bola Awofeso
WHEN: October 6th, 1998
SUBJECT: Withdrawal symptoms because there was a notice to the effect that this web site will not be updated for the next 3 days
WHAT HE SAID: "Even though the notice stated that the web site will not be updated until October 6th, I kept checking periodically, just in case."
ADDENDUM: After seeing the above, Jud Santos chimes in: "Bola was not the only one."

QUESTION: "Just in case of what?"
ANSWER: Just in case they find a message like, "Just kidding ..." Apparently, our visitors are conditioned to look for practical jokes (see example)

#261. WHO: Audrey Kingsley
WHEN: October 1st, 1998 road workout
SITUATION: For Audrey's sake, various people narrated stories of dreadful things that happened to others who ruined their running careers through over-racing and/or over-training, and ignoring advice from experienced people.
WHAT SHE SAID: "But I do listen ... to that little voice inside my head."
RELATED STORY: See #229 below.

POSTLUDE (sub-titled INSTANT AMNESIA)
WHEN: October 13th, 1998 track workout
Carsten Strandlod: "Hi, Audrey. How is that voice inside your head?"
Audrey Kingsley: "I don't remember saying that ..."
Carsten Strandlod: "If it is published, then it must be true."

#260. WHO: Tony Ruiz
SITUATION: After the (in)famous 26 x 200m track workout of September 29th, 1998, one of the slower runners of the club jogged home at a painful 12 minute/mile pace. Before long, he spotted coach Tony Ruiz sprinting along 14th Street and saying:
WHAT HE SAID: "Hey, give me another 200!"
COMMENT: As a runner, Tony has the talents to be an elite competitor. To do that, he needs to put in the requisite training like everyone else (except Tom Phillips). But, as a coach, he has many duties that get in the way of his own training. At the track workouts, he has to be the timer for multiple groups simultaneously on some evenings and the only exercise he gets is running across the field to call out the times. At the road workouts, he is besieged with supplicants when he arrives, never has the time to stretch properly and get warmed up, and is also responsible for accompanying the back of the pack home. That is why we find him sprinting down the street after everybody else has left the workout. We hope you appreciate how wonderful this guy really is. And so what if he tends to talk too long?

#259. SITUATION: Post-race interview with Tyronne Culpepper after the 1998 Fifth Avenue Mile
Tyronne: "Coach Tony told me not to kick at the end."
Interviewer: "Why not?"
Tyronne: "I don't know. He didn't say."
Interviewer: (pause) "Hmmm. Maybe it was just what you want to hear?"

#258. WHO: Michele Tagliati
WHEN: September 29th, 1998
SITUATION: This is the man who once said, "Any distance below 10 miles is very painful for my marathoner's instincts." So imagine his surprise when he came down to the track and discovered that the workout was 26 times 200m. Afterwards, this is what he said.
WHAT HE SAID: "You know what Mark McGwire said after hitting home run # 70 --- I can't believe that I did it. Can you?"

#257. WHO: Tony Ruiz
SUBJECT: Pre-race advice given to Victor Osayi prior to the 1998 Fifth Avenue Mile
WHAT HE SAID: "Don't try to keep up with the fast starters in the first quarter. There will be people who start off under 60 seconds for the first quarter, but you will be passing them very soon."
ADDENDUM: At that point, someone interjected, "That means Tyronne."
POSTSCRIPT: Final results: Victor Osayi, 4:48 (PR); Tyronne Culpepper, 4:57 (first quarter in 65 seconds)

#256. WHO: Stefani Jackenthal
WHEN: September 19th, 1998
WHERE: Stefani was a member of team # 36 (Robert Forster Physical Therapy) in the Raid Gauloises, the premier adventure race held in Ecuador in 1998. After the first day, she was quoted as saying:
WHAT SHE SAID: "This is just amazing!"
COMMENT: The art of understatement.

#255. WHO: Seth Okrend
WHEN: September 26th, 1998 at the Fifth Avenue Mile
SITUATION: In response to the question, "Hey, Seth, are you running the cross country race tomorrow?"
WHAT HE SAID: "I'll be there, ready or not. (pause). I think, not ready is more like it."

#254. WHO: Audrey Kingsley
WHEN: September 26th, 1998
SITUATION: Audrey had dropped by briefly at the Fifth Avenue Mile, a series of races that stretched over 5 hours. She was going to leave when she was told that Alan Ruben would be racing shortly.
WHAT SHE SAID: "I have seen Alan Ruben run before. I gotta eat. I'm so hungry."
WHAT SHE SAID NEXT: "Oh no! Now this is going to be on the web site."

#253. WHO: Any number of wise guys
WHEN: Thursday workout, September 24th, 1998
TO WHOM: Fasil Yilma, who did the team workout while carrying a backpack
WHAT WAS SAID: "Hey, Fasil, what's in the backpack? Bricks?"

#252. WHO: Carol Tyler
TOPIC: Her Staten Island Half Marathon performance, on a hot and humid day on a course with no shade.
WHAT SHE WROTE: "I may be slow, but I'm not a quitter --- at least, not yet!"

#251. WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: September 22nd, 1998 track workout
SITUATION: When Tony heard that Jud Santos had run two different 5K races on the same Saturday morning, he said:
WHAT HE SAID: "That's rookie shit."

#250. WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: September 22nd, 1998 track workout
WHERE: East 6th Street Track
SITUATION: Coach Tony Ruiz was looking for volunteer timekeepers. Karel Matousek offered to do the first two sets of 800m's and then keep time.
WHAT HE SAID: "No, Karel, I don't want you to keep time for me. I want you to suffer."

#249. WHO: Jud Santos
WHEN: Marcus O'Sullivan 5K, September 20th, 1998
SITUATION: When Jud found out that he had just finished 9 seconds ahead of former Boston marathon (circa mid-1970's) winner Jack Fultz, he introduced himself and said:
WHAT HE SAID: "I know this may come a little bit late, but congratulations on your Boston win!"

#248. WHO: Roland Soong
TO WHOM: Jud Santos
SITUATION: When Roland checked the NYRRC web site for the 1998 Harry Murphy XC 5K, he was astonished to find that he was the fifth scoring member (with Eric Aldrich, Jeff Kisseloff, Salih Talib and John Sargent) of a first-place team. Missing from the list was Jud Santos, who would have been second on the team if he had been correctly listed with the team. Roland immediately dashed off the following e-mail to Jud.
WHAT HE WROTE: "Jud, please don't contact Tom Kelley (NYRRC) to revise history. I need this much more than you do, because this is probably the last time I will ever be on a scoring team."

#247. WHO: George Wisniewski
TO WHOM: Jud Santos
SITUATION: Jud wanted to have the coach's approval and advice on running a marathon.
WHAT HE SAID: "You need to put on a few more pounds first, otherwise you won't be able to keep up with the training without injuries."
COMMENT: This might have been George's way of dissuading Jud, since he is setting up an impossible task for the former winner of the Negative Body Fat award on the club.

#246. WHO: Alan Ruben
WHEN: September 15th, 1998, after the track workout
SUBJECT: The so-called Alan Ruben Double (TM) --- the Fifth Avenue Mile on Saturday and the Philadelphia Distance Run on Sunday
WHAT HE SAID: "In 1997, I tried the double and it worked out great for me. So I would expect that it should work out terribly for me when I try it again this year."

#245. WHO: Victor Osayi
WHEN: September 17th, 1998, after the road workout
SUBJECT: His prospects for the Staten Island Half Marathon on Sunday
WHAT HE SAID: "My age group place will move up by one, since Alan Ruben does not plan to run this one."

#244. WHO: Martha & the Vandellas
SITUATION: On a nice late summer day in 1998, Jeff English went out to run for the first time in two years. On this one occasion, he was spotted separately by Harry Morales, Jud Santos, and Stacy Creamer. This reminds us of the old song ...
WHAT THEY SANG: "Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide ..."

#243. WHO: John Gleason
WHEN: September 17th, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "The reason that I don't have a computer is that I don't want to read about myself on the web site."
COMMENT: So he is leaving the reading to others ...

#242. WHO: Jud Santos
HISTORY: Jud won the 1996 Fred Lebow XC 5K. The fact that there were only 18 participants in this race did not detract from his accomplishment, at least not in his eyes. Here is his characterization of the lack of depth in the field.
WHAT HE SAID: "In this race, David Pullman went out with the leaders as usual. This time, though, he actually remained among the leaders."

FOOTNOTE: This same David Pullman once described Jud Santos as "a legend in his own mind."

#241. WHO: Tyronne Culpepper
SITUATION: The Westchester Puma Track Club had posted a notice on this web site that they are organizing a 'fast race, the Marcus O'Sullivan 5K' for September 19th, 1998. Intrigued by the description, Tyronne posed this question.
WHAT HE ASKED: "What does fast mean?"
COMMENT: It is self-evident --- fast means you have to keep pace with Marcus O'Sullivan (the man with 100+ sub-four minute miles).
POST-SCRIPT: As it turned out, Marcus jogged the race with his son while chatting with spectators. The race was won by a Kenyan runner in a fast 14:17.

#240. WHO: Dan Gonzalez, former Central Park Track Club member and current Millrose member
SITUATION: Dan had been winning the Saltaire races on Fire Island for something like the last 10 years in a row, until Jud Santos broke his streak this year.
WHAT HE SAID: "Congratulations! I'm sorry you showed up!"
WHAT HE SAID NEXT: "Hey, Jud, are you coming out here again next year?"

COMMENT: To show what a legendary figure Dan was in the local area, when Jud won the Saltaire 10K, three different people approached him and asked: "Are you Dan?"

REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS (@ Fairhabor.com)

#239. WHO: Roland Soong
WHEN: Harry Murphy XC 5K, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "When Larry Glazer passed me at about the one mile mark, I knew that either he was having a bad race (because he should be way ahead of me) or else I will be having a bad race (because I must have started out way too fast)."

REMEMBRANCE OF THINGS PAST: Once upon a time, Stacy Creamer and Jud Santos met near the first mile mark of a race under similar circumstances and asked each other: "What are YOU doing here?"

#238. WHO: Mel Washington
SUBJECT: Sarah Gross, who had just dashed in front of the group at the Thursday road workout, September 10th, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "Sarah is the female Roland --- except that she finishes the workout."
COMMENT: Indeed, Sarah finished this workout and Roland did not.

#237: WHO: Jonathan Federman
SUBJECT: Jud Santos
WHAT HE SAID: "Whenever they announced his name at the awards ceremony (as JUD rhyming with BUD, instead of his preferred pronunciation of JUDE), it usually triggers a barrage of jokes and wisecracks."

#236. WHO: Scott Willett
WHEN: Post-race interview after winning the 1998 Central Park Triathlon, as shown on the television program Running New York on cable channel Madison Square Garden
WHAT HE SAID: "It feels good to push as hard as you can go and have nothing left. That is what matters, not winning. If you win, it is like... eh ... you know ... a bonus."

#235. WHO: Sid Howard
SITUATION: Every January, Sid Howard travels to Bermuda to visit family and take in some running as well. Here is his description of the not-so-flat Bermudan race courses.
WHAT HE SAID: "The only place in Bermuda that is flat is the airplane landing strip."

#234. WHO: Richie Stewart
SUBJECT: Peter Gambaccini
SITUATION: The Central Park Track Club has a long and illustrious history. One of the pleasures is to listen to the characterizations of our legendary forebears.
WHAT HE SAID: "Peter Gambaccini was an animal!"
COMMENT: That was supposed to be the supreme compliment.

#233. WHO: Stuart Calderwood / John Gleason
SUBJECT: Which Richie Stewart would you like to be?
STUART: John, if you can choose between running a 1:50 in 800m versus 25:17 for five miles, what would you choose?
JOHN: (pause) I'll take the 1:50. But if you offer me 24:59 for five miles, I would take that instead.
COMMENT: We did not realize that PR's can be traded like baseball cards.

#232. WHO: Aubin Sullivan / Stacy Creamer
WHEN: Thursday workout, September 3rd, 1998, two weeks after Stacy finished 2nd in the Central Park Triathlon and one week after Aubin finished first in the Odyssey Half Ironman Triathlon
STACY: "Congratulations on your win!"
AUBIN: "Thank you! Congratulations on your second-place finish too!"
STACY: "Thank you! And thank you very much for not doing the Central Park Triathlon!"

#231: WHO: Sid Howard
TO WHOM: Jud Santos
SUBJECT: Track etiquette
WHAT HE SAID: "You run on the outside of track one, so that other people will have to go all the way to the outside in order to pass you."

#230: WHO: Julie Denney / Roland Soong
WHEN: Tuesday road workout, September 1st, 1998
Julie: "Hey, Roland, it looks like you have new glasses. That's great!"
Roland: "Yeah, it seems that too many people have been sneaking by me, so I have been missing many photo opportunities. So I figured that I gotta get new glasses."
Julie: "Oops! That's not so great after all!"

#229. WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: Thursday road workout, August 27th, 1998
TOPIC: Recommendations about the upcoming 30K race
WHAT HE SAID: "We just had the Club Championship race last weekend, and the next scoring race is the Staten Island Half Marathon in a couple of weeks. I would not recommend anyone to run this race. Unless you are Audrey Kingsley, in which case you would be running the race no matter what I say, and you will even continue to get better."
INAUDIBLE MURMUR FROM AUDIENCE: "I listen to what you say, but I am getting slower."

POSTSCRIPT: On September 1st, 1998, at the track workout, Tony declared a change of heart: "If Audrey is going to do exactly the opposite of whatever I tell her, then I am going to tell her to run everything from now on."

#228. WHO: Frank Schiro
WHEN: Tuesday track workout, August 25th, 1998
TO WHOM: Alan Bautista
SUBJECT: Alan's future as a track runner.
WHAT HE SAID: "You will do fine, as long as you don't get the distance running disease."
COMMENT: Of course, he has to say that within earshot of the press.

#227. WHO: Alan Ruben
TO WHOM: Stuart Calderwood
WHEN: Tuesday track workout, August 25th, 1998
SITUATION: Stuart had led the group out in a fairly fast mile for the first item. He said, "I hope I didn't miss up the workout for people."
WHAT ALAN SAID: "The only workout you messed up is your own."

#226. WHO: (named withheld)
SUBJECT: A photo on the Club News page
WHAT HE WROTE: "Eeeew, who is that ugly guy in the picture? I bet he's cracked a few mirrors in his time. Won't that picture scare away potential members?"

#225. WHO: Stephanie Gould
WHAT SHE SAID: "I check out the web site to make sure that I am not on it."

#224. WHO: Sid Howard
TO: Anyone within earshot
WHEN: Tuesday track workout, August 25th, 1998.
SITUATION: Sid had been the substitute coach while Tony Ruiz was away on vacation. This was Tony's first day back coaching ...
WHAT HE SAID: "You won't be able to take it easy anymore --- you're gonna have to work hard now."

#223. WHO: Raphael Devalle
WHEN: After the Club Championship 5 Miler, August 22, 1998
WHAT HE SAID: "I have done marathons, and I have done speed work down at the track. It is just those races in between that I haven't figured out how to do yet."

#222. WHO: (Name withheld in case his/her employer finds out about his/her extracurricular activities)
WHAT HE/SHE WROTE: "Bored at work, I decided to poke around the nether regions of the web site, hoping to find something to distract me from my duties. As I was sifting through the collection of softball photos, I noticed this caption: "Who is the greatest base runner of all time? Steve Henderson? Lou Brock? No, it is Karel Matousek standing on second base, while New York Flyer Kim Votava worries nervously ... NOT!" Umm, Lou Brock, I'm ok with. But didn't you mean to write Rickey Henderson (you know, the former New York Yankee who has long since passed the aforementioned Mr. Brock on the all-time stolen bases list, and still holds the single-season record of 130, if memory serves)? Or was this an "intentional" mistake, much like the error on the park map, planted there for some sleuthing club member to ferret out in her/his quest for a form of web site notoriety more rewarding than that conferred by clicking on 73 times in a row." ... and now for the dénouement of the story ... "I don't need a life, but I may need a new job...")

#221. WHO: Keith Royster
SUBJECT: Correction of a teammate's 200m race time from 25.1 to 24.1 on this web site.
WHAT HE SAID: "Sprinters get touchy about things like that."

#220. WHO: Tyronne Culpepper
WHEN: August 15th, 1998, before the start of the Manhattan Half Marathon
SUBJECT: His preparedness for the race
WHAT HE SAID: "I didn't even drink last night."

#219: WHO: Carsten Strandlod
WHEN: August 15th, 1998, before the 8am start of the Manhattan Half Marathon
TO WHOM: The web photographer
WHAT HE SAID: "Isn't this a little bit early for you to be out here?"
RESPONSE: "I'll give you the answer as soon as I am awake."

#218. WHO: Jud Santos
SUBJECT: What a (substitute) coach should prescribe for a road workout
WHAT HE WROTE: "OK, what shall I make you people do tonight? Hmmmmmm ... I am leaning towards another strength-builder (even though I know you guys did that already last week while I was slaving away in the office until 9:30), something in the order of 6x1K or 8/6/4/6/8-minute pickups, just like in the old days of Wiz. The 2nd workout is significantly longer; I would let the A and B groups run 7.74 miles (6-mile loop plus lower loop), and the C group, 6.8 miles (5-mile loop plus lower loop). All 3 groups would then be out for around 48 to 52 minutes, if I calculated it right. Or would you prefer an NYH-type workout like 3x3 minutes for a 6-mile loop, *plus* (this is a Jud addition) 1 lower loop at 10-mile race pace (total: 7.74 miles)? This sounds like a good torture workout as well..."

FEEDBACK # 1: Michael Garland wrote: "I won't be there, so make it a hard workout."
FEEDBACK # 2: Ellen McCurtin wrote: "Just thinking about it makes me tired."

POST-MORTEM NOTES:

Roland Soong wrote: "I ran out of gas after about 6.5 miles and I stopped at the 7th avenue exit, which was particularly alluring to me since it is right next to the 57th Street N-train entrance. I stood there for a long time, and saw no one coming around except for John Gleason. So I must conclude that this workout must have wasted everyone else. Good job, coach! You just made sure that those newcomers will never come back!"

Tyronne Culpepper wrote: "Thanks for the great workout! I'm sure I'm only one of the many who would like to kick your %&^$#!#^&*! But in all seriousness, it was something we all needed. Not to get your head bigger, but it definitely drew raves from the masses!!! Keep up the good work!" To which Jud replied, "You mean, from whatever masses were left (see Roland's comments above)... P.S. -- There were 9- and 10-mile workouts from the mid- to late-1980's that I was for a minute considering, but I didn't want to lose all my friends..."

#217: WHO: Aubin Sullivan
TO WHOM: A teammate whom she always seemed to pass late in the road workouts.
WHAT SHE SAID: "It was hard not to pass you because you were always just walking slowly."
COMMENT: Touché!

#216: WHO: Roland Soong
WHEN: Tuesday, August 11th, 1998
WHERE: East River Park Track
SITUATION: In response to Audrey Kingsley's question, "What pace does a 1:30 half-marathon correspond to?" in the middle of the workout, he said:
WHAT HE SAID: "Six ... (huff) (puff) (huff) (puff) (huff) (puff) ... six fifty-two ..."
COMMENT # 1: Audrey knew that it could not be a six-minute mile pace, but the response seemed to be very long in coming. She should be glad that the words came out eventually, and not his lunch ...
COMMENT # 2: Audrey also said that she thought about asking Alan Ruben instead. Well, that would be a big mistake because we can see the following response forthcoming: "I wouldn't know because I don't run that slow." Mary Spera (of Millrose) said that she thought this was really funny. We point out that Alan never said that, that he probably can provide the correct answer in a flash but that we only thought that this would be in character (to be more precise, our version of his character).

#215: WHO: Tyronne Culpepper
SUBJECT: On being actively courted to run track, after his 56 second 400m at the MAC Mini-Meet (August 1998)
WHAT HE SAID: "Contrary to popular belief, I am & will always be a roadie, but track is definitely a lot of fun!!:-)"

#214. WHO: Tyronne Culpepper
SUBJECT: The fact that Coach Tony Ruiz set out to run 9:30 for the 3000m at the MAC Mini-meet (August 4th, 1998) and ended up with an actual time of 9:29.7.
WHAT HE SAID: "He is the coach. He is supposed to be able to do that sort of thing. After all, how is going to teach us that if he can't do it himself?"

#213. WHO: Nathan Klejman
SUBJECT: His marathoning philosophy, as reported in the September 1994 Club Newsletter
WHAT HE SAID: "It is like lottery ticket buying. If I purchase one more ticket, maybe I'll win this time."

#212. WHO: Mel Washington
SUBJECT: Boston Marathon, 1993
WHAT HE SAID: "I should have stayed with the toasted whole-wheat bread and forgotten the bran muffins. Pepto-Bismol was totally outmatched. A long, cramped walk just to finish."

#211. WHO: George Wizniekski
TO WHOM: Fritz Mueller
WHEN: Just before the 1990 New York City Marathon
WHAT HE SAID: "If you place on this year's team, I'll shave my beard."
COMMENT: Fritz ended up sixth on the team, being the first time in 17 NYC Marathons that he did not place.

#210. WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: Philadelphia Distance Run, September 18th, 1994
WHERE: Near 7th mile mark
TO WHOM: Jud Santos and Casey Yamazaki, whom Tony passed at that point.
WHAT HE SAID: "You're in trouble, Casey. You too, Jud."

#209. WHO: Alan Bautista
SITUATION: At the end of the July 30th, 1998 workout, four attendees (Tony Ruiz, Alan Bautista, Roland Soong and Sarah Gross) were having a discussion at the 59th Street entrance into the park. Bill Dunlop came running by on his own and asked, "So how was the workout?" Tony said, "I'm only the coach, so you better ask these guys." The three others looked at each other, giggled and finally Alan volunteered:
WHAT HE SAID: "You are asking three people who couldn't complete the workout!"

#208. WHO: Harry Morales
SITUATION: At the end of the July 30th, 1998 workout, Tony Ruiz said that he was going later to a Latino concert featuring La India and Tito Rojas at Brighton Beach with his uncle. Harry blurted out:
WHAT HE SAID: "Is that the uncle with whom you hung out in the pool instead of running the Club Championship race last year?"
COMMENT # 1: Hear ye, hear ye! Let the truth be known now!
COMMENT # 2: By the way, for the record, it was not this uncle but another one.

#207. WHO: Peter Allen
TO WHOM: Alan Ruben
SITUATION: Through the good auspices of Peter Allen, Alan Ruben joined the Central Park Track Club after the 1990 New York City Marathon. In his first race for the club, Alan was passed with 300 meters left to go by Peter, who said:
WHAT HE SAID: "Don't worry. It's only me."

#206. WHO: Mel Washington
WHEN: July 23rd, 1998 road workout
SUBJECT: Being quoted on this page ...
WHAT HE SAID: "I have not said anything recently, so I am safe."
COMMENT # 1: No, you are not, because this meta-saying (saying about saying) has just been published.
COMMENT # 2: Of course, this reminds us of the big question "Is it safe?" from our favorite running movie, "Marathon Man" which include familiar Central Park scenes such as the Reservoir path and the southern pump house.

#205. WHO: Tony Ruiz
WHEN: July 21st, 1998 track workout
TO WHOM: Josh Vendig, who returned to do the workout after being out with an injury for about a year.
WHAT HE SAID: "I am glad to see you back. Didn't you win the Rookie of the Year award? People who won that award have a tendency to slink away for good thereafter."

#204. WHO: Aubin Sullivan
TO WHOM: The web photographer
WHEN: July 21st, 1998 track workout
SITUATION: "Ross and I ran the Run for Goodwill 5 Miler as part of a long training run. When we saw you on the course with the camera, we quickly ducked and sneaked by."
COMMENT: The anti-social elements are taking over the club ...

#203. WHO: Sid Howard
WHEN: July 7th, 1998 track workout
SITUATION: To keep the recovery jog going, he yelled
WHAT HE YELLED: "This is the Central Park Track Club, not the Central Park Walk Club!"
COMMENT: Yes, we understand that, but he should also remind some of these people that this is not the Central Park Triathlon Club, the Central Park Ultramarathoning Club, the Central Park Bicycling Club, etc, given the types of extracurricular activities that they indulge in.

#202. WHO: Tony Ruiz
SITUATION: Karel Matousek had opted to go weight-lifting instead of attending the July 9th, 1998 workout. When he told Tony that, the latter had this reaction.
WHAT HE SAID: "Weight-lifting? Runners don't lift weights. Well, at least, real runners don't lift weights."

#201. WHO: Doug Kabash
WHAT HE WROTE: "I don't know why, but I didn't make it into this year's marathon. I looked on the list that is posted at the NYRRC web site and my name wasn't there. I followed the application procedure exactly as I did last year. What should I do? My world is crashing! Help!"
COMMENT: Dear "My world is crashing", don't panic! Please contact your favorite local team rep, and he/she will go down to the NYRCC and do some serious begging on your behalf. The New York City Marathon is a club team scoring race, and it is reasonable that our team members should be able to run the race if they have followed all the proper procedures.