In the Central Park Track Club 20th Annivesary Commemorative Book, the following was presented:

You don’t have to be fast … if you got a good tan

 CPTC awards are not all trophies and plaques.  For example, among the non-running presentations at  the 1987 December bash were these tasteful bestowals: the “George Hamilton Lifetime Achievement Award” went to the very young, very tan Greg Kraemer; the “Better Late Than Never Award” went to the women’s masters team; the “Allstate You’re In Good Hands Award” to David “Finger” Malamut, CPTC’s unparalleled masseur; the hotly contested “Fred Kolthay Serious Beer Drinking Award” went to Marge Demarrais, and John and Jane Kenney were the hands-down winners of the “Breed For Speed Award.”  And they had barely begun.

Then there was the year Jud Santos got the “Body Fat Awareness Award,”  Ellen Wallop got the “Ultra Athlete Terminatrix” (oh, those biceps!), Irene Jackson and George Wisniewski were joint recipients of the “Keith Hernandez Bad Habits Make Good Leaders Award,” and once, long time ago, Tomi Gomory was given a Godzilla-sized Quaalude.  Isn’t it nice we grew out of that stuff …?

The reason that those 'fun' awards were discontinued was that they seemed to take up an inordinate amount of time during the presentation at the party for what was essentially silliness  But that does not mean that the Central Park Track Club website cannot promulgate this tradition.  This is an opt-in procedure --- if you don't want to waste your time, you can hit the BACK button on your browser.  But then you will be wondering for the rest of your life if you were actually awarded something.  Yes, it could happen to you ...

GOLDEN GOAL AWARD WINNER:  Kim Mannen COMMENTS:  For her 'magnetic' personality, Kim is awarded one soccer ball to go with the two that she has already received this year PRIZE MONEY:  One free MRI scan to be claimed in the next outdoor season

ANGELS FROM HEAVEN AWARDS PURPOSE:  To thank those unexpected runners who showed up to score big for the team just when we needed help WINNER #1: Eric Boucher, Snowflake 4 Miler WINNER #2: Kate Crowley, Snowflake 4 Miler WINNER #3: Sonja Ellmann, Skagg-Walsh 5K WINNER #4: Margaret Schotte, Fred Lebow Cross Country 5K WINNER #5: Andy Merrifield, Staten Island Half Marathon

SPINNING GLOBE AWARD ("WHERE ON EARTH ARE THE AMERICAN MARATHON RECORD HOLDERS?") WINNER: Kevin Arlyck COMMENTS:  For traveling all over the globe to defeat American marathon holders - December 15, 2001, Jacksonville Half Marathon, 'beat' Jerry Lawson (AR 2:09:35, Chicago 1997) - October 27, 2001, Marine Corps 5K, 'beat' Khalid Khannouchi (AR/WR 2:05:38, London 2002)

FLICKING TONGUE AWARD WINNER:  Ali Rosenthal COMMENTS:  Our gratitude to her for making us a faster and an infinitely more interesting and fun team.  (We would have liked to give her 'the straw that stirs the drink' award but of course that may cause problems with others ...)