WEEK OF MAY 28-JUNE 3, 2002

• NORTH COUNTY NEWS 5K:  
  Q (from Martin Lenne): "Does a CPTC member need to run sub-19 minutes to get his/her name listed under the race results?"
  A: "No, time is not the issue.  All that is required is the ability to spell his/her name correctly."
  A (from Martin Levine): "I spelled it correctly..........It's just that the woman at the registration desk couldn't read my shitty handwriting.  That's what happens when you show up a 8:49 for a 9:00 race, because I did a good deed and picked up a teammate and his very cute mystery woman at the Scarborough train station at 8:20.  But the best part is that I didn't even notice the misspelling when I perused the results."
   
  (Name withheld): "Wow, you got those NCN 5K results up before I could even email you and say 'DON'T PRINT MINE' since my PT and a certain French person would be horrified to see that I ran a race when I am supposed to be taking a month-plus off from running."
   
  Steve Paddock: "Another stinker from me, but a 1-1 draw is better than a loss."  
  Comment: If you stay up to watch a 530am soccer game (England vs Sweden), don't expect to run a PR at a 9am race.
  Additional note:  Toby Tanser said that he would show up to watch the second half of this game, but never appeared at Steve's place.  Instead he ran the 9am Race Against Teenage Smoking in Central Park.
   
• RACE AGAINST TEENAGE SMOKING: There was major confusion about the first results as six of our runners (Graeme Reid, Sean Fitzpatrick, Fred Trilli, Rich Hollander, Michael Rosenthal, Jonathan Zuckerman) were not listed originally.  Okay, you're going to say "Who cares?" about a non-scoring race, but it mattered a lot to Graeme Reid who wrote: "I think it is a conspiracy involving James Siegel --- he is trying to cover up the fact that he got his ass kicked again!"
     
• RIVERDALE RAMBLE 10K:  This race is famous for a lot of big hills, of which the most famous is Wave Hill (see the photo) when you are looking at eye level at the shoes of the runner right in front of you.  Irene Jackson-Schon wrote: "This was the worst nightmare of a 10K that I have ever run at sea level. Who knew that there were mountains in the Bronx?"  
   
  Our team had a good showing, with these age group winners
  - Ricardo Granados, 1st M40-44 plus 1 pair of Mizuno shoes for first master male
  - Victor Osayi, 2nd M45-49
  - Frank Schneiger, 1st M60-69
  - Maria Chale, 1st F40-44 plus 1 pair of Mizuno shoes for first master female
  - Irene Jackson-Schon, 1st F55-59
  - Carol Tyler, 1st F60-64
  plus winning men's open team (Ricardo, Victor and Blair Boyer would have won the men's masters team but they can receive only one of those trophies)
    
  
  Victor Osayi
    
• WORLD CUP STATUS REPORT
  - After the opening game, the fans of Les Bleus are having the blues.  This team looked old and tired, and maybe waiting for Zidane to save them.  
  - Germany, which was picked by no one here, looked strong with a 8-0 win over Saudi Arabia, but this is not a true test.  It looked as if the Saudis were quite unprepared for the physical nature of the German play.  
  - Spain's winning margin (3-1) was wider than the actual situation, since they were awarded a phantom penalty kick just when Slovenia seemed to be coming back
  - Ireland was lucky to escape with a draw because they looked as if they were out of gas late in the game.
  - England vs. Sweden is summarized by Toby Tanser: "God did I suffer watching Eng Vs Sweden - my two citizenships and two pathetic teams!"  Actually not, because the first half had a good English team and a pathetic Swedish team and the second half had a good Swedish team and a pathetic English team (you know, just kicking the ball downfield and hoping for a good bounce).  But we must not forget that Toby's pick is Argentina, which looked good enough.
  - Brazil and Italy both won confidently.  And Brazil is the kind of team that we would stay up until 330am to watch ...
   
  Additional comments: If you watch these games on Univision/Telefutura instead of ABC/ESPN, you won't have to put up with those very annoying English-speaking commentators (where do they find them?).
    
• WHAT DO TEXANS THINK OF NEW YORKERS:  From University of Texas alumnus Kim Mannen: "In order to live and succeed in New York, you need to be very high-energy, very driven, very passionate, and you must exude, 'I love New York,' because New Yorkers are very snobbish about their home."
   
• BEGINNING RUNNERS' GROUP WITH TOBY TANSER:  If you know anyone who wants to begin running and is scared to do so, or intimidated to join a club, please note that Toby Tanser will be running a class for beginners (you know, people who say "I'd love to run one day" or "I'm able to run three miles but I want to do more") on every Monday night at 7 PM in Central Park as of mid June. There will be incentives to attend from NIKE!  And it is free to anyone, so email Toby Tanser ( toby@tanser.org ) for details if you or anyone you know would like to attend.
   
  Any prescription for healthy living should involve some element of physical exercise.  Participation in a sport provides a stable exercise environment that also includes aspirations, goals, accomplishments and peer support.  That is why Nike does not consider itself a mere sport equipment manufacturer .  The Nike product line is not shoes or clothing --- it is a lifestyle!  This being the case, the marketing goals would not just be selling a few more shoes, but to get more people involve in various sports, who will end up purchasing sports equipment, be they Nike brands or other ones.  As there is clearly a large untapped market in sedentary individuals, getting them involved in sports is profitable as well as socially beneficial.  For this particular group, Nike will provide refreshments, clothing items and a support truck.
   
  For those who don't know the name Toby Tanser, this man is a running legend in Iceland, Sweden, Kenya, New York City and we don't know where else.   In this city, he is the coach of the Urban Athletics club and The Reservoir Dogs.  He is the author of the book Train Hard, Win Easy: The Kenyan Way.  He is a member of the Central Park Track Club, and had an astonishing 17 individual road race wins last year.
    
• WEB ACCESS STATISTICS FOR MAY:  This month saw a slight retreat from April's statistics.  It just goes to show that our content is event-driven.  All we need is more races (and parties).  There is one downward trend since March, namely the fewer time spent per user session having dropped from 8-9 minutes to 6:30 minutes.  This coincides with the appearance of this journal page, whereby it makes sense to check in more frequently here because all the news that is fit to print is here.  Sometimes, there is even news that is unfit to print ...
    
• THE RAE BAYMILLER LINE:  Our teammate Rae Baymiller is starting a new company with her own line of clothing.
   
  introducing Rae ...  an active sportswear line for today's woman ... one that goes from active sports and exercise to streetwear for work or
  dinners out ... for the contemporary 'on-the-move' lifestyle.
  
  the first silhouette...the signature short, available June 10 ... two options both at $38. in sizes small (4-6), medium (8-10) and large (12-14)...some
  silhouettes later will include extra (16-18) and grande (20-22)...
  
  Rae. website ready July...for further information or to place order 10 June or after contact Rae at,  rbaymiller@aol.com or 212.245.8220.
   
• WORLD CUP OPENING MATCH:  France 0, Senegal 1.  Not as much of a shocker as it seems, as virtually all of the players of Senegal play for French clubs anyway (and most of the French players play outside of France) and the team plays a very European style of football.  What would be the biggest shocker of all time?  How about June 29th, 1950 --- USA 1, England 0?  Frank Handelman wrote: "I was up early to watch the first match, and if Senegal can beat France, USA can beat Portugal."
   
  Steve Paddock on the likelihood of getting a 5K PR this weekend --- "Sports on television is killing me!  I have to stay up till midnight to watch the NBA playoffs and then get up at 230am to watch the World Cup!  And when I come across the French Open tennis, I can't help but watch!"
    
• WINTER IN THE ABRUZZI:  This is from the final paragraph of Natalia Ginzburg's essay written in 1944:  "I had faith then in a simple, happy future, rich with fulfilled desires, with shared experiences and ventures.  But that was the best time of my life, and only now, now that it's gone forever, do I know it."  So the next time you come to a workout or race, keep those words in mind.
   
• NON-QUIZ:  We were told --- someone in the Texas barbecue photo album is pregnant.  Guess who?  This is a no-win-and-everything-to-lose game.  Make one wrong guess and we are dead.  Make one right guess and we are dead.  Therefore, we pass ...
   
• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT:  The workout began with a presentation ceremony of a Hawaiian lei from Olivier Baillet to coach Tony Ruiz.  This was in celebration of Olivier's 12th place overall and 1st age group finish at the Keauhou-Kona Half Ironman Triathlon, thereby qualifying him the Hawaiian Ironman Triathlon World Championships for the second year in a row.  During the race, he was not sure where his position was and even his half marathon run was slow (1:32:33) compared to his own standard, he was passing people in the end.
   
  Direct observation --- someone wearing a U.F.T. team singlet has a nice suntan.  Cause and effect.  When we grow up, we want to be teachers too and take the whole summer off ...
   
  A roll call after the race would suggest that we will have quite a few people up at the North County News 5K this week.  Why let your training and conditioning go to waste, when there is a flat and fast course to test yourself?  Apart from the people who are chasing their first 15:XX times, Zeb Nelessen should be a lock to break his PR of 18:31 (reminder: Coach's instructions --- Just follow our fast women!).
   
  Seen after the workout: a very pregnant Stacy Creamer who was given 'time off for good behavior' by her doctor to come out to the reservoir.
     
  You will recall that the You Gotta Have Park race was held in appalling weather conditions on May 18th.  That was why we thought that Zeb Nelessen's win that same morning at the Pine Barrens Sprint Triathlon was so remarkable.  Well, now we just found out that Harry Morales ran 6:29:14 at the Long Island Endurance Run 50K on the same day in that weather.  As for his time, you need to consider that he took a wrong turn on the course and ran an extra 3 miles.
   
  The weekend after the Women's Mini Marathon, we will be making a field trip to the Shawangunks for a long run in the sticks.  More details to come.
   
• WORLD TRAVELER:  Where in the world is Ramon Bermo ... ?  In London?  Or San Diego?
   
   
   
• SUMMER CAMP:  School's out and it is time for summer camp.  This particular camp is less physical than the usual one, but we note that it is transnational (Canada/USA).  More significantly, one of the camp mentors is Tivon Jacobson (NYU).
   
• STUDENT PROFILE:  Not to be outdone by his friend, Jonathan Pillow (NYU) gets a student profile.
   
• WORLD CUP FEVER:  With due respect, notwithstanding the many comments that have been received so far, we do sense an absence of deep passion.  Why was all this outpouring not good enough for us?  As Albert Einstein did not say, "Everything is relative."  Genuine passion can be observed if you go ask Tim Evans, "Tell us about the 1972 Canada-USSR Summit ice hockey series.  And tell us about Paul Henderson's goal ..."
   
• KEAUHOU-KONA TRIATHLON:  Olivier Baillet's 12th place finish is all the remarkable because in 18th place is eight-time Hawaiian Ironman winner Paula Newby-Fraser.
   
• TEXAS BARBECUE: This is a photo album and --- have no fear --- definitely not a food review ...
   
• SQUASH PARTNER WANTED: From Kevan Huston: "As exciting as all this talk about the forthcoming world cup tournament is, might I trouble you to post a solicitation for any squash players among the membership?  It's been some months since I've played -- I'm no Peter Nicol to be sure -- but would like to have a match now and then.  Interested parties can email me at khuston1@earthlink.net ."
   
• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT:  Two weeks ago, we ran this photo with the sub-title Timers In Peril.  Today, peril struck.
   
  Here is some background.  We train on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the East River Park track.  Today, we had sixty-three people running in four groups in the long distance runners, one group of fourteen middle distance runners and one group of nine sprinters.  Members of the New York Harriers, Millrose and Urban Athletics also used the track, as well as other runners in the community.  This park is a public facility, and is used by runners, soccer players, volleyball players, rugby players, children, etc. 
   
  In the infield, which was designed for soccer games, there were two soccer games going on simultaneously.  Each game took up half the field because they were two different teams playing intra-squad games for training.  One team brought their own three-foot tall mini-goals (see that photo) while the other team just placed markers on the ground.  Both teams elected to place their goals on the sidelines in their half of the field, and this has the very unfortunate effect of placing the goals at exactly the spot where the runners start (again, see that photo).  As we noted two weeks ago, the soccer balls were whizzing past by the runners and the timers.  The soccer players were reckless in this regard because this type of set-up was designed for goals to be scored as easy ground-level tap-in's and not as 70 mph Roberto Carlos-style shots intended to fracture goal posts and goalies' jaws; and, of course, they could have placed their goals anywhere other that the spots where the runners congregate.
   
  It was under these circumstances that a soccer ball hit the head of one of our runners tonight as she stood on lane three waiting for her group to start.  To our minds, the soccer player who made the shot was reckless because that was a high-velocity shot into a crowd of people.  What was he thinking?  For a moment, our runner actually passed out.  She is a triathlete used to taking lumps, but there may not be any real training for getting hit in the head.  She was alright afterwards, with the icepack from Frank Handelman coming in quite handy.  We prefer not to publish her name here, but we will say that it was not Shelley Farmer who has already paid her dues in her encounter with the unleashed dog in the park ...
   
  In the aftermath of the incident, there was a heated discussion about the placement of the goals.  In the end, after some words, those goals were re-oriented so that they appear respectively in the full goalmouth and the center circle and nowhere near any runners.  Someone had to say, "I can't wait to read what the workout report had to say about this tonight!"  Well, you will find no stories of hot Latino temper, steroid rage or whatever it is that you think you want to read about.  We will report on the only thing that matters --- Bola Awofeso's bike is safe and sound!
     
  As a warning to all troublemakers, we must say that we are not a group of people to mess around with, not just because we numbered 86 people on our team today, but because we've got the doctors (to look after our people) and the lawyers (to sue the bastards!).  Just kidding ...
   
• MORE WORLD CUP COMMENTS: 
  Jeff Wilson: "I wish there was some way for me to say that I care, but I don't."  Jeff, do you really think we care either?
  Josh Feldman: "How come nobody has picked Team USA to win?"  Josh, for good reasons.
  Paul Bendich: "My pick to win the World Cup is Italy.  After all, they killed the game with their dull, defensive play."  To quote Ronaldo: 'They still have catenaccio in Italy.  They just don't call it that anymore. Now they say ben messo.'  Read this story about the glory of Italian football.
  Tyronne Culpepper: "How come you didn't mention Bebeto?"  Who?  You mean the guy who played in the J-League?
  Steve Paddock: "I'm going home to sleep right now, to make sure that I have enough to stay up for a whole month."
  Magno Silva, an office clerk in Rio de Janeiro. was quoted in the New York Times today: "We've already won four Cups.  Let the Argentines win one for a change.  They need it more than we do."  To complete the circle, the first World Cup pick way back when was Argentina by Toby Tanser.
   
• THE GREAT CARROT CAKE ROBBERY:  We reported to you that our middle-distance runners elected to hold their Sunday workout at Van Cortlandt Park in order to have carrot cake (and eat it too) across the street afterwards.  So there they were, they ran their 3x1 mile workout hard on the track, they went for a two-mile warm down in the flats and then they crossed the street to find the carrot cake place ... CLOSED!  Marty Levine rued: "I even skipped breakfast in anticipation of the carrot cake."
   
  Much stranger things have happened up there, as we repeat this story from 1997 Peter McArdle 15K cross country race: "The race began over an hour late, due to one of the funniest incidents I've ever witnessed at a race. The MAC folks were expecting rain, so out of consideration for the runners, they decided to move the registration indoors to the Southend Bar across the street from the park. They put all the registration materials in there early Sunday, and then left to come back at 10 a.m. But so did the owner, who locked the place up and didn't come back! The only person in there at 10am was a drunk who was laid out on the floor. People thought he was dead, because there must have been 25 people banging on the windows and hollering to wake him up so he would open the door, and he wasn't moving. Finally, after a half hour of the kind of noise that would have startled Helen Keller, the guy got up, stared at the window, ignored everyone and lurched into the bathroom where he passed out again on the floor. It took about a dozen phone calls before they were able to find someone who worked in the bar to come down and unlock the door."  This story was told by Jeff Kisseloff, who was a long-time Central Park Track Club member and is presently with the Taconic Road Runners Club now that he is a Sleepy Hollow (Westchester county) resident.  We were glad to read that Jeff ran the Ridgewood 10K yesterday in 43:03, when he had previously thought that his running was over due to a knee problem.
   
• VAN CORTLANDT TRACK CLUB SUMMER SERIES XC:  As a reminder, the VCTC summer series will begin this week, on Thursdays every two weeks at, 7pm, Van Cortlandt Park, NYC.  (May 30th, June 13th, June 27th, July 11th, July 25th, August 8th.)  This is a small, friendly race that Jonathan Federman, Brian Barry and David Pullman like.  Race entry fee is only $3.
   
• MEMORIAL DAY THOUGHTS:  From Roland Soong: "Of the many people in my life that I remembered, the Central Park Track Club personality must be Jack Brennan.  So, as a small token of my appreciation of the 30 years of competition, leadership and humor, I have just sent in my contribution to the Jack Brennan Fund.  This is a community fund in Jack's name to benefit youth sports and community programs in Westchester.  The initial goal is $5000.  I am sure that it would please the Brennan family immensely if this goal was achieved by many contributions (no, size does not matter here) from his friends.  So I urge you too to make a contribution to: The Jack Brennan Fund, c/o the Westchester Community Foundation, 470 Mamaroneck Avenue, Suite 304, White Plains, New York 10605."

• EDUCATIONAL PHOTOS:  Last week, we showed a photograph of what not to do --- namely, hog up three lanes during the workout.  This week, we show you a photograph of what to do --- one lane is all it takes for the middle distance group.  It is that easy ...

  

WEEK OF MAY 21-MAY 27, 2002

• EVEN MORE WORLD CUP TALK:  From Roland Soong: "Of course, you know that once I start talking, there is no stopping the torrent of words.
   
  First of all, let me state that I am not making any predictions.  That is the domain of God, who is the only Infinitely Wise one.  Instead, I will vote from my heart.  My job is made easier because I consider myself a world citizen (having lived in Shanghai, Hong Kong, Sydney, Bogota, Lima, San Salvador, Buenos Aires, New York City, Boston, Philadelphia, San Francisco, Los Angeles and Memphis) and I do not feel bound to vote for nationalistic reasons.  I am of Chinese descent, but I have never seen the Chinese national team play, but I understand that their fans are mightily ill-behaved (on each of the previous six times that they failed to qualify, they responded with xenophobic street riots) and their coach is (no surprise at all) former USA national team coach Bora Milutinovic.  As for Team USA ... ehhh ... never mind ... there is a lot of public relations talk but there is no team identity to speak of.
   
  I do have a big problem because there is a deep bleeding hole in my heart.  Alas, the original orange team --- Holland --- will not be at the World Cup finals this year.  So the "Total Football" tradition invoked by names such as Johan Cruyff, Johan Neskeens, Johnny Rep, Rob Resenbrink, Ruud Krol, Marco Van Basten, Frank Rijkaard, Ruud Gullit, Marc Overmars, Dennis Bergkamp, Patrick Kluivert, Edgar Davids will not be seen this time.  What joy is joy, if soccer be without the orange team?
   
  But from the 32 teams in the final, there is an obvious choice --- Brazil.  While this is the nation which has won the most number of World Cups, they have fallen into hard times lately.  Soccer in Brazil is totally devastated due to financial mismanagement, and clubs raise money by selling their players to Europe.  This is best exemplified by my company's Brazilian partner, who owns the Rio de Janeiro soccer team Botafogo, which had fallen from league champion straight into second division faster than you can say Botafogo.  
   
  The qualifying rounds were difficult for Brazil, who had to beat baseball-playing Venezuela in the last match to clinch their spot.  That is understandable when you consider the core of this team is dispersed all over Europe --- Cafu (AS Roma-Italy), Roque Junior (AC Milan-Italy), Lucio (Bayer Leverkusen-Germany), Edmilson (Olympique Lyon-France), Roberto Carlos (Real Madrid-Spain), Emerson (AS Roma-Italy), Rivaldo (Barcelona-Spain), Ronaldo (Inter Milan-Italy), Ronaldinho (Paris St Germain-Paris), Denilson (Real Betis-Spain), and they have no real opportunity to play together until they get together for the World Cup.
   
  My vote from the heart is based less upon Brazil's illustrious history than Brazilian style of soccer with flair.  Samba soccer, it is called and the names are Garrincha, Pele, Jairzinho, Rivelino, Carlos Alberto, Careca, Socrates, Zico, Junior, Romario, Ronaldo, Rivaldo ...  But the current coach Luiz Felipe Scolari has a reputation of being defensive-minded, and that would have killed all the joy.  A crude description of the team is: "Eight defensive-minded players and three offensive-minded players (namely, Rivaldo, Ronaldo and Ronaldinho)."  This is a grossly unjust caricature.  Over the last year, I have been watching AS Roma in the Serie A games and I must say that I have never seen a right back (Cafu) exert such a dominant influence in a game.  In terms of American football, this is like saying that your most potent scoring weapon is your right cornerback!  Mind you, Brazil has the equally potent Roberto Carlos at left back.  It is literally impossible to imagine a dull negative, defensive game from Brazil.  For what it's worth, the coach has dumped 36-year-old prima dona Romario as well as the volatile Edmundo (aka "The Animal").
   
  As for the forwards, this is largely irrelevant at this level of play.  All strikers are star athletes (Ronaldo, Ronaldinho, Francesco Totti, Christian Vieri, Alessandro del Piero, Thierry Henry, Michael Owen, Robbie Fowler, Luis Figo, Gabriel Batistuta, Alen Boksic, Davor Suker, Cuauhtemoc Blanco, Luis Hernandez, etc) and opposing teams will assign their best markers to shadow them and hack them down at every opportunity.  The stars that emerge from the World Cup are usually stay-back midfielders such as Hristo Stoitchov, Gheorge Hagi and Zinedine Zidane.
   
  So it is that I hope to see some exciting football over the next few weeks (without losing too much sleep) ...
   
  P.S.  You may think that this whole World Cup business is silliness, but we will tell you that the top investment bank in New York City does not think so (see the scatterplot  of GNP per capita versus FIFA ranking from their 56-page report). 
   
  
   
  Investment acumen would suggest that these data (especially the FIFA rankings) are suspect ( #13 ranking of the Team USA, right behind England and Germany!?).
   

• RANDOM POSTCARD FROM IOWA:  A home-made postcard with two "I Love NY" pictures came from Greg Wilcox of Des Moines (IA) to our mailing address (to wit, Craig Chilton): "Random selection #292 from the Internet. Dear New Yorker, All Iowans offer our support to you and NYC.  I developed both ideas for these two photos which were taken in Des Moines.  Again, NYC is in our hearts.  How is NYC doing?"  
   
  How is NYC doing?  We remember reading about the statistic that one-third of New Yorkers suffer from post-traumatic stress, whether they realize it, seek treatment or not.  We quote from W.H. Auden's seemingly prescient poem September 1, 1939:

Faces along the bar
Cling to their average day:
The lights must never go out,
The music must always play,
All the conventions conspire
To make this fort assume
The furniture of home;
Lest we should see where we are,
Lost in a haunted wood,
Children afraid of the night
Who have never been happy or good.

...

Defenseless under the night
Our world in stupor lies;
Yet, dotted everywhere,
Ironic points of light
Flash out wherever the Just
Exchange their messages:
May I, composed like them
Of Eros and of dust,
Beleaguered by the same
Negation and despair,
Show an affirming flame.

• MORE WORLD CUP PREDICTIONS:  From Gordon Holmes: "Sadly missing from the various CPTC World Cup predictions has been the Irish team.  Allow me to reminisce, moist-eyed, upon some famous victories we have recorded over the English team (Euro '88), Italy (World Cup '94) and the Netherlands (Dublin '02), and our quarter-final showing in 1990.  Putting aside the inconvenient fact that our captain (some might uncharitably say, our only quality out-fielder) has been ejected from the team, I will confidently predict that we will be tough to beat and have an excellent chance of making it to the second round, and that our supporters will drink those of any other country under the table.  If we get to play against, England, Sweden, or even les Bleus, I like our chances of producing a dull, defensive-minded draw which will live long in Irish memory.  Ole, ole ole!"
   

• 2002 NEW YORK CITY MARATHON:  Yes, this race is more than six months away, but the database contains the accepted runners as well as lottery choices.  A cursory glance shows that we'll have a strong women's team --- Alayne Adams, Margaret Angell, Stefani Jackenthal, Kate Crowley, Stephanie Gould, Audrey Kingsley, Shelley Farmer, Etsuko Kizawa, Sarah Gross, Ana Echeverri, Anna Fyodoroa, Andrea Ostrowski, Mary Minieka, Laurie Jones, Yumi Ogita, Kellie Quinones, Sandra Scibelli, Glenis Frank, Julie Buck, Martha Rojas (note: this list is very much incomplete due to the fact that there is no easy way to run a search such as by team code) and ... oh my God! ... Stacy Creamer!  This is a team that is capable of averaging better than 2:55 for the open women scoring team (note: the fastest three have a sub-2:50 average PR).  And, for once, we will even field a strong masters team with a possible sub-3:00 average.  All we can say is, "Stay Healthy and Strong."  If not, Dr. Hamner is always there ...
   
  Just to be fair, we also looked at the men's team --- Toby Tanser, Alan Ruben, Craig Chilton, Richie Borrero, Kevan Huston, Jonathan Pillow, Peter Allen, Hank Berkowitz, Noel Comess, Graeme Reid, Victor Osayi, Patrick Cowden, Bill Komaroff, Rick Shaver, Ricardo Granados, Craig Plummer, Eric Boucher, Charlie Stark, Anthony Munk, Glen Carnes, Olivier Baillet, Ramon Bermo, Michele Tagliati, Marty Levine, Tyronne Culpepper, Adam Newman, Casey Yamazaki, Fred Trilli, Vincent Trinquesse, Jerome O'Shaughnessy, Jeff Wilson, Jesse Lansner, Larry King, Blair Boyer, J.R. Mojica, Jonathan Zuckerman, Robert Haig, Luis Lima, Scott Gac, Erik Schmitz, Jamie Rosen, Michael Rosenthal, Seth Rosenthal, Brad Weiss, Paul Sinclair, Chele Modica, Robert Francis, Mel Washington, Bob Schulz, Dave Howard, James Siegel, Kent Freeman, Guenter Erich, Jay Borok, Jonathan Cane, Peter Homsher, Jose LaSalle, Anthony Mayorkas, Phil Vasquez, Derek O'Connor, Bill Schaaf, Jarl Berntzen, Jeff Aronis, Tom Rodman, Dion Mulvihill, Bola Awofeso, ...  Not all entrants were identified here, and not all those listed will be in the race.  But this is a long list that should put us in the money for 40 runners under 4:00.  And that men's masters team is incredibly deep with at least 10 sub-3-hour runners in there --- if only this competition were scored ten deep!
   
  By the way, we checked (with a lot of trepidation) and did not find our middle-distance stars Erik Goetze, Isaya Okwiya, Lauren Eckhart, Kim Mannen, Steve Paddock, ... phew!
   

• SUNDAY TRACK WORKOUT:  This Sunday, the middle distance group is holding a track workout.  But where?  It is somewhat boring to hold workouts again down at the East River Park track.  Fortunately, there are plenty of other facilities around --- the trails and roads of Central Park, the Riverside Park track at 145th Street, the Rockefeller estates and the trails and track at Van Cortlandt Park.  When put to a vote, the majority chose Van Cortlandt Park because they want to have carrot cake afterwards (see, for example, Bola Awofeso).
   

• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT:  Temperature --- mid 60's; sky --- clear blue; humidity --- none.  This is as good running weather as it can ever get.  Forty-eight people were present at the workout.  This was a decent turnout if we remember that the Memorial Day weekend has already begun for some people (e.g. our work office will be closed on Friday).  Unfortunately, this workout was the dreaded Harlem Hill workout, which has been rated as follows: "The reason that I subscribe to the Coollist email workout descriptions is that I know I don't have to come if we have the Harlem Hill workout." 
    
  The coach would like to convince you that the upcoming scoring races (the Women's Mini Marathon on June 8th and the Gay Pride 5M on June 29th) are important for us.  Unfortunately, the conversations during the workout seemed mostly about the logistics of staying up very late (or getting up very early) to watch the World Cup games.  The opening game is on May 31st, between France and Senegal.  Paul Bendich says, "I'll be down at the pub at 730am to watch this game.  Since I don't have to teach now that the semester is over, I really don't care what time of day they play."  By the way, we have to warn you that the website maintenance routine is expected to be seriously interrupted because we expect to be watching the French team ... where else? ... in France!  More about that later ... 
    

• CAREY WALL STREET RAT RACE:  In this race, Toby Tanser won in 13:52 while Audrey Kingsley was third female in 16:56.  While the race distance was advertised as 2.5 miles (or 4.01km), the actual distance was more like 2.7 miles (or 4.3km).  In other words, Toby and Audrey were really not as slow as those times originally implied.  Even so, Toby's 13:52 is slower than his 5K PR time.  Audrey's pace in this race (6:16 min/mile) is still slower than her 5K PR pace, which is a relevant issue now because that was achieved at the very flat and fast North County News 5K.  This year's North County News 5K will be held on June 2nd, and Steve Paddock has a couple more seats in his car.  Please email Steven.Paddock@badenochandclark.com if you are looking for a 5K PR.  But if you cannot make it to that race, there is always the Ridgewood Races on Memorial Day, where we expect to see Sylvie Kimché, Andrea Ostrowski, John Gleason and the French spouse of one of our teammates.   As with this time of year, the weather may be unpredictable.  The first time that Andrea ran that race, it was cold.  The second time, Andrea got her sister to run the first race of her life and it was ninety-nine degrees.  For what it's worth, the long-range weather forecast has Memorial Day as being cloudy and mild (high temperature of 72 degrees).  Bola Awofeso is also thinking of going, not so much to run because his hip is still hurting, but to bring his brother who has come to visit him from Africa and has so far not ventured outside of the apartment much (it's too cold!).  Yes, New Jersey should be quite a culture shock!  Oh, this tip may come to you too late, but if you don't like meandering trains of thought, you should not be on this website ...
   
  
  Tyronne Culpepper
    

• ALLEZ LES BLEUS!  From Kevin Arlyck: "Yay! I've been sitting around biting my tongue as all the blowhards out there assault us with their wrong-headed WC prognostications, and the French contingent stands quiet. Imagine, we had to wait for a Brit to bring some sense to bear on this matter!

  I'll admit I don't exactly know what "going for" means.  Is Steve rooting for France (a commendable act), or just picking them to win (an intelligent one)? Seeing as how England will most likely need to beat France to make it to the finals, he's in a bit of a bind.

  I've discovered a painless solution: I am both rooting for France AND picking them to win the whole thing. An easy choice, really, when it concerns the best team on Earth.

  The Swedes are tough, granted, but Toby is certainly picking with his heart, not his head. They'll be a welcome treat for the French in the second round, if they manage to get that far. 

  As for Ramon, I'm glad he enjoyed the Real Madrid victory handed to him by Zidane (note: the captain of France), because, as he well knows, his quadrennial fortnight of embarrassment and heartbreak are just around the corner.

  And why are the Italians so silent? Perhaps recent history has taught them well the folly of getting their hopes up for a major international tournament.

  I'll be prepared to lead a rousing chorus of La Marsaillaise at the July 2nd track workout, if any one cares to join me. Allez Les Bleus!"
   

• MORE VICTORY COUNTS: According to the prevalent usage, the Kingsley number refers to your total mileage over the last 7 days.  But for this website, we adapt the seven-day rolling total concept to the number of reported races and that Kingsley number today is sixteen (bearing in mind that we don't have and may never have the MAC meet results). 
  
  - SRP Night Run For The Arts (Phoenix, AZ)
  - Briarcliff Manor Centennial Race (Briarcliff Manor, NY)
  - Carey Wall Street Rat Race (Financial District, NYC)
  - Buckley's To JFK 6 Mile Run (Queens, NYC)
  - Forest Park Classic 5K (Queens, NYC)
  - Bay to Breakers 12K (San Francisco, CA)
  - Middletown 5K (Middletown, PA)
  - Pine Barrens Sprint Distance Triathlon (Shamong, NJ)
  - Columbia Triathlon (Ellicott City, MD)
  - National Veterans Eight-Stage Road Relay Championships (Birmingham, UK)
  - Volvo Midland Run (Far Hills, NJ)
  - 19th Annual Queens Biathlon (Queens, NYC)
  - Home Depot Mid-May Classic (Fairfield, CT)
  - Bonac Shuffle 5K (Easthampton, Long Island, NY)
  - You Gotta Have Park 5M (Brooklyn, NYC)
  - JP Morgan Chase Corporate Challenge (Central Park, NYC)
   
  Comment #1:  This list of races covers all types of categories across the globe.  The person who has the data entry job actually found it exhilirating to see all these events stream in.
  Comment #2:  There were four individual wins: Toby Tanser twice, Zeb Nelessen and Charlotte Cutler, making this one of our best weeks.  We note that Toby beat a legend in the Carey Wall Street Rat Race --- Doug Kurtis, now 50 years old, who has the highest number of sub-2:20 marathons at 76.
  Comment #3:  In the case of The Website vs. The People, the website discovered ten of those races on its own and thus held a 10-5 advantage.  However, we are delighted to report that at least one of our members has discovered a loophole --- the pre-emptive win.  So it was that Matt Newman informed us today that he will be doing Ironman Brasil on Saturday, so the score for next week is 2-1 (note: the website has two wins already because we have read the entrants' lists for the Spring Lake 5 Miler and the Ridgewood Races).  We encourage this method because it certainly makes things easier for us.  But we suspect that there will always be those who prefer to torture us with "I ran a race this weekend and it has not been posted yet!"  Now who would say a mean thing like that?  You know who you are and we know who you are ...
   

• AN APPEAL FROM STEPHANIE BECKER (note:  Stephanie Becker is the fiancée of Matt Newman and she will be a new member of CPTC)

  Dear Friends,

  I hope all is well with you as we approach this holiday weekend!

  From June 30th to July 6th, I will be participating in the European AIDS Vaccine Ride from Amsterdam to Paris - cycling 500 miles in 6 days. I will be one of the 1,200 idealists riding to raise money for two of the world's leading university research facilities: the UCLA AIDS Institute and the Emory Vaccine Center.

  I have agreed to raise at least $6,000 in donations by June 15th. In need your help. (Plus, I would like to beat my last years' total!) Would you consider making a fully tax-deductible contribution to help me reach this goal?  Please consider only an amount that is right for you.

  You can visit my homepage to make the donation, and get more info. You can pay by credit card  or check on-line, it's really pretty easy.  (But if you could just shoot me an email or a xerox of your check so i can make sure i thank you appropriately!!!)

  Sorry this is so last minute (I admit I did procrastinate a little, I hate bugging people for money) . I would love to chat, or send you a paper copy of a donation form, or answer any questions........

  Thanks in advance for helping me support what I feel is a really worthwhile cause - I would not have registered for this three years in a row if  I didn't think it made a difference!!!!!

  Sincerely,

  Stephanie
   

• NORTH COUNTY NEWS 5K  This race will take place on June 2nd, Sunday in Yorktown on one of the flattest, fastest course in this area.  Steve Paddock says: "I am definitely going to go to this one.  Can you put something on the web to see if we can get a bunch of people together to share the car?  Email me at Steven.Paddock@badenochandclark.com)."  Yes, Steve, it's 15:XX or broke!
   
  From Marty Levine: "The Kannouch, who is the current world record holder for marathon, will be at this race to run talk and sign autographs (for any running groupies).   The race got a very low turnout last year because of the lousy weather but they had a very nice spread of food afterwards.  The course is definitely flat and fast."
    

• MORE WORLD CUP  PICKS:  The same Steve Paddock wrote: "You knew that I had to comment on the greatest month of any four years at some point.  I am going for France in the World Cup although it pains me to do so.  But I predict a heart-stopping roller coaster ride for England, hopefully as far as the final. This is the best team we have had in a long time so I am hopeful for a high finish."
     

• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT:  It is definitely not yet summer, with cold, breezy and sunny weather.  The workout was straightforward --- 4 x 1200m and it was over by 7:45pm.  This is probably the record for the earliest finish, but it was still later than the record for the latest start (7:37pm, according to the official records).  Highlight of the day was Zeb Nelessen's retelling of the Pine Barrens Sprint Triathlon (see item below).  This is hopefully the first of many triathlon triumphs this year, since we all know that the real CPTC is the Central Park Triathlon Club.  But Shelley Farmer warns us, "Ehhhh ... don't count on me winning anything right now.  I'll be lucky if I finish.  I am going to skip the Montauk Triathlon, but I will do the Lake Placid sprint triathon where I expect to die terribly."
   
  Stranger #1 of the day was Brian Marchese: "I've been spending the last few months in Münich, Germany where I did not run and I drank a lot of beer.  I came back today to take an inventory of the pains and aches on this club, and there is a lot of it around here."
   
  Stranger #2 of the day was Tivon Jacobson: "Hi, remember me?  I'm the rock climbing NYU graduate student who is studying hyperbolic laws of conservative systems ..."
   
  Social talk of the day (of the week? of the month? of the year?) was that Kim Mannen is engaged.  This raised a certain amount of speculation since Kim's fiancé is not a member of the team (yet).  So we promised to publish some photos.  Kim does not believe that we have pictures of the couple, so we will produce the first of the series:
   
  
   
  We offer people fair warning that even with 7,000 photographs published so far on this website, we still have a few hundred more reserved for odd occasions (such as blackmailing).
    

• PINE BARRENS SPRINT TRIATHLON: Zeb Nelessen's report: "So we got out there on Saturday morning.  The weather was atrocious, but the race organizers knew that it would stop later, and therefore delayed the race start by an hour.  We sat and wait in our car in the parking lot, and the rain was coming down in buckets.  When we got out of the car, we found that an umbrella was useless because the rain was coming in horizontally.  All the while, we could see people giving up and backing out of the parking lot to go home.  Finally, around 945pm, they called for the first wave.
   
  Now this was a strange day because the air temperature was in fact colder than the water, which meant that a fog was rising up.  Swimming in the rain does not really bother anyone because they are going to get wet anyway.  What was ridiculous was when I got out of the water and headed into the bike transition, I had to pick up my helmet and empty the rainwater that had accumulated in it first.  For the first ten miles of the bike ride, there was a cross wind.  Then we turned into the wind, which was strong but not impossible because the road was lined with trees on both side.  But it was really great when we came back with the wind on our backs.  I was flying at 33, 34 miles per hour, and the only annoyance were the puddles in the road.  I actually had the fastest bike leg of the day, except my transitions were horrendous.  
   
  I thought that this race was sufficiently obscure that the website guy will never find it.  But I was wrong ..."

• PHOTO ANALYSIS:  The above seems to be an idyllic romantic photo with suitably soft edges, featuring from left to right: Andrea Costella, Jerome O'Shaughnessy, Shula Sarner, Frank Morton, Peter Homsher, Sarah Gross in a track workout.  However, this photo is shown here as material for educational purposes --- NEVER TAKE UP THREE LANES WHEN YOU RUN!!!  PLEASE!!!

WEEK OF MAY 14-MAY 20, 2002

• VICTORY TOTALS:  With three wins this week, our individual total just went up to 9.  At the same time last year, we had 23 wins already (with 13 coming from Toby Tanser!).  But it looks like Toby Tanser might be back on a roll again with his win this weekend.  We were also quite impressed by Zeb Nelessen's win at the Pine Barrens Sprint Distance Triathlon on Saturday in all that cold wind and rain.  He was 20th in the swim and 7th in the run, so his victory was built upon his 2nd place in the bike.  Imagine sloshing through the water in that driving rain!  Yes, we knew it all along --- triathletes are CRAZY!
   
  By the way, our original metaphor for the conditions at You Gotta Have Park was 'This must be what running in Iceland is like.'  Then we thought better because just the sort of thing that someone who has never been to Iceland would say.  After all, nobody got blown away by the wind into the ocean in this race.  Perhaps Toby Tanser will care to tell one or two real Icelandic eddas, in prose or poetry.
    
• NEWS CYCLE:  Just to re-iterate the rules of the game: you run a race on the weekend, you tell no one and you check the race results posted on the website on Monday.  If it was published already, you lose; if it was not published, you send in an email to claim the win.  This weekend's score was 8-3 in favor of the website.  The winners are those who ran the Forest Hill Classic 5K, the Middletown (PA) 5K and (what do you expect!?) the National Veterans Eight-Stage Road Relay Championships (UK).  The website has maintained a winning percentage for the longest time, but it has seldom achieved shutouts.  So while we know that our heaviest traffic occurs on Mondays because of the weekend race results, we emphasize that you ought to check in on Tuesday as well.  We think that we are a better team for this, for how else could you keep with all your many, many friends' accomplishments without the website (and all the intrigue)?
   
  POSTSCRIPT:  The score moves to 8-4 with the addition of the Buckley-To-JFK race.
   
• WORLD CUP PICK:  Still no pick by us yet due to the fact that not all the rosters are in.  We must admit to being less than enthusiastic about the whole process, since our sentimental favorite failed to qualify.  (Sniff, sniff, sniff).  Who would you suppose is our sentimental favorite?  Silly, why do you even have to think twice?  It must be the orange team.  TOTAL FOOTBALL, ALL THE WAY!  Now instead we are going to stay up late at night to watch the Italians play the catenaccio for 0-0 draws ... yawn ...  By the way, those are not solely our personal sentiments.  After all, even Sid Howard has been seen wearing that real orange sport suit.
   
• FUND ESTABLISHED IN MEMORY OF CLUB FOUNDER JACK BRENNAN

  May 18th would have been Jack's 53rd birthday. His family has established a community fund, to benefit youth sports and community programs in Westchester, and keep Jack's memory alive. Eventually they plan to establish an annual run in his honor (they promise to have a special award for the first CPTC finisher). The initial goal is $5000.00. Jack gave our team 30 years of competition, leadership and humor.  CPTC members can make contributions of any size to: The Jack Brennan Fund, c/o the Westchester Community Foundation, 470 Mamaroneck Avenue, Suite 304, White Plains, New York 10605.  
   
  Thanks - Marian Brennan and Frank Handelman
   

• GREAT CPTC T-SHIRT GIVE-AWAY:  The great CPTC T-Shirt giveaway will continue at Tuesday night track workouts while stocks last. These T-shirts are colloquially known as the ' No Smokin' therefore no need to quit' t-shirts and are generously brought to you by David Pullman of The Pullman Group. For those members who cannot pick up their t-shirts on Tuesday evenings, they can be picked up at Alan Ruben's apartment at 801 West End Avenue, Apt 5E (99th Street) ( alan@montran.com ).  Incidentally, Alan brought some of those t-shirts to the You Gotta Have Park race on Saturday, and they were greatly appreciated because everyone wanted as many layers of clothing as possible in that cold.
   

• ... AND HOW MANY LAWYERS?  Now that we answered the question about the number of doctors, someone else wants to know how many lawyers are on the Central Park Track Club.  After all, the J.D. degree stands for "Juris Doctorate," or "Doctor of Jurisprudence."  That is a tough question, because lawyers do not usually betray their origins whereas doctors reveal their professions by using highly technical terms to describe their injuries.  We know that the following are practicing lawyers: Devon Sargent, Frank Handelman, Mary V. Rosado, Bob Laufer, David Blackstone, Mark Gumbiner and Marissa Tiamfook.  And to that list we can add one guy who has a J.D. but never took the bar exam --- John Prather.  Noah Perlis has a law degree but does not practice law other than dispensing free legal advice.  Nine people out of a hypothetical base of 200 would be just 9 / 200 = 4.5%.
    
  What is the baseline for comparison?  The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports a total of 890,910 persons 15+ employed in the legal occupation in year 2000.  But that is a larger group because it presumably includes judges, legal scholars, clerks, paralegals and adminstrative staff.  890,910 out of 215 million is less than 0.5%.  Again, it would seem that we are above the national average.
   
  Of course, all these silly little comparisons against national averages are really not relevant.  The Central Park Track Club draws its members mainly from around the Central Park area in New York City (but we also have members outside of New York such as London, Paris, Tokyo, etc).  Necessarily we reflect the composition of our immediate neighborhood.    Furthermore, the base of 200 is so small that it is sensitive to the status of just a few individuals.  For example, we have five Harvard University graduates (Tom Phillips, Margaret Angell, Margaret Schotte, Lee Shearer, Sara Grillo and that is without even counting Devon Sargent (Harvard Law) and John Sargent (Harvard Medical)); this 5/200 = 2.5% incidence is much higher than the national incidence of Harvard University graduates.  At the same time, we have one Grinnell College graduate in Paul Bendich; this 1/200 = 0.5% is also much higher than the national incidence of Grinnell College alumni.  (Frank Morton adds: "Add one more for Grinnell College. I attended Grinnell for 2 years, so although I am not a graduate, I am considered an alumnus (I must be because I keep getting solicited for contributions).")  Another way of looking at this is: as a percentage, each one of us is 0.5% = 1 / 200, and 0.5% out of 210 million adults is over 1 million.  If we all went to 200 different universities (note: not strictly true, since one of us attended seven different universities!), then all those universities are over-represented in our club and all other universities in the country are under-represented.
   
  The point here is that, as with any other similar social organization, we are going to be diverse and eclectic.  From our About The Central Park Track Club page, we had listed these occupations: "Actuary, ad salesperson, art historian, athletic coach, author, bank teller, beach bum (okay, use the euphemistic 'lifeguard' label, if you insist), actor, advertising strategist, AIDS researcher, architect, attorney, baker, biology researcher, chemist, chiropractor, computer programmer, copier machine maintenance worker, editor, emergency room doctor, fashion designer, fireman, health care consultant, counselor, investment banker, journalist, lawyer, mathematician, midwife, model, molecular biologist, motorman, movie reviewer, nurse, nutritionist, physicist, poet, policewoman, portfolio manager, probation officer, university professor, prosecutor, psychologist, public and social policy analyst, publisher, real estate broker, reporter, running coach, salesperson, sculptor, sociologist, sports doctor, sports writer, statistician, student, surgeon, teacher, trader, trainer, translator, triathlon coach, underwriter, university administrator, university professor, urologist, venture capitalist, webmaster, writer, ..."  Each and every one of us is unique in some fashion.  By chance, we happen to meet each other within this organization.
   
  A more important question might be this: "How many of the members of the Central Park Track Club are narcs (e.g. worked for the Drug Enforcement Administration)?"  We know of three people, but we will not name them because they were all involved in undercover work.  So you are hereby warned to be a bit more discrete in the future about telling your little stories of indiscretion, because one or more of them might be in your audience.  This has been a public service announcement from your favorite website.  (Point of clarification: In spite of what you may believe, the above was not created for the purpose of chasing undesirables away from the team).
   

• PLACE MARKERS:  A query came in about the presence of a link in the results page without actual results being posted (e.g. Columbia Triathlon).  This is a place marker for an event in which we know that we have entrants and the results are not available yet (e.g. the entrants' database showed Nicole Billman, Sylvie Burlot and Erik Schmitz).  Come back later, and those results will be posted as soon as we get them.
     

• NAME YOUR TEAMMATES:  This week's front cover photo is quite challenging insofar as your ability to name those people who were at the track workout.  There are 10 persons who are clearly identifiable (L-R: 1 female in black, 1 female with orange top/black pants standing in the rear, 1 male in black top/light shorts, 1 female in light grey/white/green in front,  1 female with white top and long blue pants with white stripe, 1 male with green top/blue shorts, 1 female with light blue top/dark shorts/big smile, 1 female in profile with black top, 1 male with grey top and beard, 1 male with orange t-shirt) in this photo.  How many can you name?
   
  
   
  If you got a lousy score, don't fret too much.  Even your photographer could not name two of them.  To raise your score, just come down to the track and talk to people ... 
   
  Okay, you want some extra points?  Who is that woman in profile on the left right behind the female in black?  This bonus point is an absolute give-away.
   
  Jesse Lansner: "Will you be posting the answer to this at any point?  I'm only sure of 4 of them, plus 2 that I think I got. Pretty sad considering that I was running with this group when the photo was taken (white shirt, blue shorts, and one leg visible in the far left foreground, identifiable mostly by the garish pink thing with the Discovery Channel logo on my sneaker that holds my keys)."
    

• YOU GOTTA HAVE PARK WRAP-UP: We understand that when the schedule for club scoring races came up for discussion, there was the notion of having no races during the month of May.  However, someone (and it had to be someone representing the Central Park Track Club) put forward the idea that May has the best running weather of the year, and consequently this race was put on the schedule.  What great running weather!  It was cold, windy and wet out there.  The coach's pre-race instructions were simply: "When you see the first puddle, just run right through it instead of skirting around it like everyone else.  You are going to get wet, sooner or later."
   
  Before the race, the question came up as to whether this one might be cancelled.  Why?  Running races are cancelled due to ice/snow because of the possibility of injury due to slipping or extreme heat/humidity.  Rain?  Cold?  What has that got to do with anything?  Meanwhile, we heard that the Peter Schlendorf Duathlon was cancelled due to 'flooding.'  We suppose that while it is possible to cross a river by foot, it is harder on a bicycle.  We remember that Jonathan Cane wrote a few days ago: "I won't be racing, but will be out on my geeky tri-bike for a little while, so I hope to see everyone there."  Did he make it out of that swimming pool with his bike?  Jonathan answers: "No, I did not brave the conditions to come out and train on Saturday. I used my fancy CompuTrainer and 'rode' indoors.  Large puddles, racers in my lane and general lousy conditions made it seem like an easy choice, though somehow I knew my absence would be noted on the web site."
   
  The talk after the race was not about personal records or accomplishments.  Everyone seemed to be glossing nostagiac about that swimming pool-sized puddle that had to be traversed twice.  Stéphane Bois said, "It was guaranteed to wash away all the mud that you got on your body  to that point of the race."  Another topic is the number of times that one's shoelaces became undone and how impossible it was to retie them when your fingers have no feeling.  In that section of the race, Sarah Gross beat Kate Crowley by a score of 4-2.  Steve Paddock had the foresight to demand someone else to double-knot his shoelaces beforehand.  
   
  Scoringwise, the men's open team was in fourth place.  The bad news is that the masters men will not go undefeated this year, although our lead is still considerable (72-55 over JSRC).  The good news is that Jerome O'Shaughnessy, by virtue of this third place today behind Alan Ruben and Victor Osayi, has earned his rightful place on the podium at the awards ceremony.
   
  Of course, the rain stopped around 10:45am right after the race.  Our middle-distance running group had scheduled a workout at the Van Cortlandt Park track
       11:25am Warm up & stretch 
       11:45pm Light Drills & Strides 
       12:00pm Start Intervals 
       3 x 1 mile @ 5k pace, 2:00--2:30 min rest
  The rain would no longer be falling at 12:00pm.  The only problem is that there might still be water barriers around the track.
   

• CHAMPIONS LEAGUE CHAMPION: ... is Real Madrid, beating Bayer Leverkusen with the deciding goal coming from Zinedine Zidane.  Ramon Bermo wrote: "I think it's only fair, that we show all those Brits, Italians and other wannabes just who the best team really is....Real Madrid, already having been named the team of the 20th century and, at this pace, to be named the team of the 21st century ... P.S.  Yours truly was lucky enough to take off from work and watch the game... ole,ole,ole,ole ... Madrid, Madrid..... ..."
   
  So Ramon took a day off.  What did our Arsenal fans do?
  At one extreme, one of our Arsenal fan was at the office and listened to the Manchester United game on webcast.  When Freddie Ljunberg scored at the 70th minute for Arsenal to break the deadlock, she jumped up, pumped her arms and yelled Gooooooooool, much to the consternation of everyone in her workarea!
  At the other extreme, another of our Arsenal fans called in sick for the entire week.  Unfortunately, but very typically so, this very private matter was published on the website for the whole world to read.  So for that entire week, his heart would skip a few beats whenever the phone rang at home because he was so sure that his boss must have just read that news item on this website ...
  Meanwhile, our Tottenham fan keeps his distance from all this (note: after all, he is in Tokyo (Japan)).
    

• HOW MANY DOCTORS?  Apparently, we opened up a can of worms when we mentioned that we had the reputation of being the team of 'lawyers and doctors.'  We were asked, "How many doctors are there on your team?"  Well, since our policy is "Don't ask, don't tell," we don't know the exact number.  Notwithstanding that artless dodge tactic, we can name those that we know ('by accident', of course) possess doctorates.  We think that we can count them on one hand: Dan Hamner, Randy Ehrlich, Alan Bautista, Dan Sack, Michele Tagliati, ... okay, how about with both hands? ... David d'Adamo, Gordon Streeter, Shula Sarner, Alayne Adams, Tim Evans, ... okay, so maybe this is getting out of hand ... and Joseph Kozusko, Marie Davis, Josh Friedman, Jiyon Lee, Chele Modica, Eric Vanden-Eijnden, John Sargent ... oh, of course, we almost forgot Roland Soong ... did we miss anyone? ... yes, Dr. Isaya Okwiya and Dr. Fritz Mueller.  These are people with doctorates, in medicine as well as chemistry, biomechanics, psychiatry, mathematics and thermonuclear physics.  Assuming that this is all and that our total membership is 200, this is 20/200 = 10%.  
   
  What is the benchmark for comparison?  According to the Current Population Survey from the US Bureau of the Census, there are 2,032,000 persons with doctorates out of the population of 213,773,000 persons 15 years of older, which is less than 1%.  Okay, so maybe we are slightly above average ...
   

• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT:  The men's scoring race is set for Saturday morning in Prospect Park, so today's workout drew only forty-eight people.  That is surely a good sign, but for the fact that Kevan Huston will not be racing.  All racers were sent out to run easy with Erik Goetze around the reservoir.  For the racers, we'll remind you about two things: (1) If you are taking the Q train to Prospect Park, please be aware that there will be delays due to track work (see the item further down the page for details); (2) please make sure that your club affiliation is listed on your bib when your pick it up --- do not let your talents go to waste! 
   
  THE THINGS THAT WE FIND OUT:  Today is the tenth anniversay of John Gleason with the Central Park Track Club.  We bet that you didn't know that.
   
  NO MORE STALE JOKES: Stop already!  This one has been beaten to death: "How many Ph.D.'s does it take to fill out an NYRR race application form?"
   
  Q&A: "How do you know if Jerome O'Shaughnessy is ready to run?"  "He is ready to run if he is under-dressed, like showing up in shorts and singlet in early January.  He is not running if he shows up in a t-shirt and tights, like today."
   
  HOW TO YOU FIX YOUR BIKE:  Bring your bike to the workout and ask any of our many cycling pros, such as Noel Comess.  You get a full explanation of the speedometer too.
   
  WOMEN'S MINI-MARATHON:  This June 8th race is the premier race for women on the calendar.  Scoring will be five deep instead of the usual three, so we would like to have a large turnout by the women.  Now that the two half marathons are done, we have several shorter races (10K or under) coming up.  Therefore, in addition to our endurance athletes, we should be able to add the likes of Kate Crowley, Nicole Billman, Stefani Jackenthal, ...  We will also see the debuts of our new twenty-something-year-old runners too.  What fun!  Apart from the women, we plan to organize a mass turnout of men at certain locations for cheering sections.  For example, a traditional gathering point has always been the one mile mark across the Museum of Natural History.  Details will be forthcoming.  Clear out your very busy social calendars for this.
       

• CHASE CORPORATE CHALLENGE SPECTATOR LIST:  Ana Echeverri, Audrey Kingsley, Steve Paddock, Bola Awofeso, Stacy Creamer (violating bed-rest laws), Frank Schneiger, and Peter Gambaccini.  Of the aforementioned, only Bola Awofeso received mention by Toby Tanser: "Bola from CPTC would have won the race but he took a wrong turn, and did an extra lap of the bridle path."  Unsolicited comment: "Are you so desperate as to publish even spectator lists?"
    

• BOARD OF ED WINS CHASE CORPORATE CHALLENGE: The Board of Education team which includes Kevin Arlyck (5th place overall, 2nd on the team, 19:02) and James Siegel (5th on the team, 19:57) won the men's team competition, thus proving that the hard-working, underpaid teachers are better runners than the best from corporate America.  Joe Tumbarello also ran for the Board of Education.  Hopefully, our teammates' success will go a long way to erasing the unfair reputation that the Central Park Track Club is the team of 'doctors and lawyers.'  We are just as blue-collar working class as the next team ... (at least, we like to think so) ...
   

• CHARLOTTE CUTLER WINS CHASE CORPORATE CHALLENGE:  From the race website:
    
  "(Deena) Drossin held the finish tape for a pair of outstanding winners on this night. Rolly, one of the top 10 marathoners in his native France and a physical therapist for Columbia Presbyterian, won the men's crown in 17:21, topping Ricardo Bailey of the Board of Education (18:24) by more than a minute. Charlotte Cutler, a British diplomat for the United Nations, defeated teammate Stephanie Hodge 20:45-21:55 for the women's crown.
   
  "Stephanie won this race (New York #1) last year, and I happened to see her at another race a week later," Cutler said. "I didn't realize at the time we both worked for the U.N. She told me about what a terrific event it was, so I had to try it for myself."
   
  Both Cutler and Rolly are first-time Corporate Challenge® winners, and come from different backgrounds. Rolly is a devout marathoner with his sights set on running a 2:15 in the 2002 Chicago Marathon. Cutler is a half-mile specialist, having honed her craft as one of the U.K.'s top collegiate 800 runners at Cambridge University.
   
  "Normally I tend to go out too fast because of my training," said Cutler. "But tonight I went out evenly and had a fun race."
   
  The London native also had a message for the U.K.'s Royal Mail Letters team, the defending champions from the 2001 JPMorgan Chase Corporate Challenge Championship®.
   
  "Last year we finished second to them," said Cutler. "This year, we're going one better." Let the rivalry begin."
    

• MAC TRACK MEET (ASTORIA PARK, 10am, MAY 19, 2002):  Almost slipping under the radar screen is this MAC track meet.  Event details are published in the linked page.
   

• MORE WORLD CUP PREDICTIONS:  Three more predictions from Toby Tanser:
  (1) the leading goal scorer will be Gabriel Batistuta (AS Roma)
  (2) Sweden will make at least the semi's, and be the tournament's surprise.  
  (3) England will be the flop (note: a spice of Orange controversy)
   
  Our comments:
  (1) It does not matter how good Gabriel "Batigol" Batistuta is, because every opposing team will send someone like Jens Jeremies (Germany) to hack him all over the field.
  (2) Hmmm ... how is a bunch of people who drive trucks on weekdays and play soccer on weekends going to get into the semi's?  Toby replied: "Samman vag de tog i '94!!  (The same road they took in 1994 when they got into the Semi's only to lose to Brazil on penalties)."
  (3) Ooops ... Toby just lit a match underneath Shula Sarner, Steve Paddock, Charles Allard Jr., etc.  Nothing beats an intra-mural mud-wrestling match for entertainment.
   
  Shula Sarner's comments:
  "Well, I think it's too close to call. The only comment I have at this stage is ... it's not fair. England are in the hardest group, and since Freddie Ljunberg is an Arsenal player, I kind of have a soft spot for Sweden. Hmm. My only other comment is, I'll be surprised if the USA (perennial winners of the 'World' series) will win anything."
     

• ALBANY SPRING CLASSIC PHOTOS:  The photos from Sue Pearsall are most enjoyable for the pained expressions of Isaya Okwiya running in the gale-force wind.
   

• YOU GOTTA HAVE PARK:  As you all know, most Manhattanites do not own cars unless your name is Sandra Scibelli.  That means the easiest way to get out there is via the subway (see MTA map).  If you are taking the Q train, please read the following very carefully: "Participants planning to take the Q train to Saturday's race should allow extra time to get to Prospect Park.  Due to track work in Brooklyn, the Q train is terminating at Atlantic Avenue, with shuttle bus service to the Prospect Park stop. Please allow ample time to make it to the 10:00 a.m. start in Prospect Park."  We would like to proclaim the usual "This has been a public service announcement from your favorite website" but truth-in-advertising requires us to disclose that the above paragraph was cut-and-pasted from the NYRR website.  If nothing else, we are scrupulously honest ... if you can believe that, then we have a bridge to sell you.
   
  From Jonathan Cane: "In case anyone wants to avoid the Q train and the shuttle bus to Saturday's race, there is another option. The 1 or 2 to Grand Army Plaza will leave you about 1/4 mile from the entrance to the park and about a mile from the start. Just follow Flatbush Av. through the huge traffic circle and you'll be at the GAP entrance. Turn left along the park drive when you enter the park. I won't be racing, but will be out on my geeky tri-bike for a little while, so I hope to see everyone there."
   

• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT:  Only forty-eight people showed up at the distance runners' workout.  It was cold (low 50's) and windy (20mph gusts), which makes it unpleasant all the way through.  Steve Paddock wondered, "When will it ever be summer?"  Be careful --- you may get what you wish for ...  And if you did not leave soon enough after the workout, you would have been caught in the rain.  But the real danger came not from chill, cold, rain, wind, thunder, lightning, wildin' teenagers, taxis or muggers, but from getting hit by the shots on goal by the soccer players!  Our timers are especially at risk because the finishing point of every set is located right next to the mini-goals, which meant that they stand there reading the splits as soccer balls go whizzing by.  

              Timers in peril: Audrey Kingsley, Stephanie Gould, Lauren Eckhart
 
TIMERS' OPINIONS:  There are two schools of thought.  There are timers who are injured and who therefore preferred to move as little as possible.  For them, the ideal workout is one in which they don't have to move an inch.  Then then are timers who actually enjoyed sprinting across the field to catch the group on those 200m, 600m and 1000m sets.  That is because we have all noticed that we were running as if we had springs on our feet when we run across the artificial grass field!  It felt wonderful! 
   
ART CRITIC: About her photo at the Allure Mother's Day Half Marathon, Shula Sarner said, "That was the worst possible picture that can be taken of me!"  We told her that we were actually contemplating the footnote: "... and this is the sort of photo that her 'awful' boyfriend will e-mailed to her relatives all over the world!"
 
PILLOW TALK:  On last night's update, we wrote an item about Jonathan Pillow, whose name had not been mentioned for many months.  Before we know, the real Jonathan Pillow showed up at today's workout.  Is this sheer coincidence?  If you think so, you deserve to be hit by lightning.  He did read that item because he said he went to check the workout schedule and saw the news headline "Pillow Talk."  In any case, he is back in the running, ready for the summer races and aiming for the New York City Marathon.  Jonathan reminisced about some memories: "I remember that there was a determined effort to get the workout to start on time ..."  That was then, this is now ...

• ALLERSEELEN:  In the USA, Memorial Day falls on the last Monday of May.  This is a national holiday in memory of those who died in the armed forces.  In Europe, All Souls Day (Allerseelen) falls on November 2nd, and is a day for us to once again be close to those whom we loved in the past but who no longer grace us with their physical presence.  In the poem of Hermann von Gilm below (which has to be appreciated in the form of our all-time favorite lieder composed by Richard Strauss), the memories go back to what happened once upon a time in May.  So this May, we ask you to spend a moment to remember all of those who have departed, including Jack Brennan whose birthday is this coming Sunday.
  
              ALLERSEELEN (Hermann von Gilm)

  Stell auf den Tisch die duftenden Reseden,	Place on the table the fragrant mignonettes,
  Die letzten roten Astern trag herbei,	Bring inside the last red asters,
  Und laß uns wieder von der Liebe reden,	and let us speak again of love,
  Wie einst im Mai.	as once we did in May.
  Gib mir die Hand, daß ich sie heimlich drücke	Give me your hand, so that I can press it secretly;
  Und wenn man's sieht, mir ist es einerlei,	and if someone sees us, it's all the same to me.
  Gib mir nur einen deiner süßen Blicke,	Just give me your sweet gaze,
  Wie einst im Mai.	as once you did in May.
  Es blüht und funkelt heut auf jedem Grabe,	Flowers adorn today each grave, sending off their fragrances;
  Ein Tag im Jahr ist ja den Toten frei,	one day in the year are the dead free.
  Komm an mein Herz, daß ich dich wieder habe,	Come close to my heart, so that I can have you again,
  Wie einst im Mai.	as once I did in May.

WEEK OF MAY 07-MAY 13, 2002

• ALLURE MOTHER'S DAY HALF MARATHON:  In that race, our first three runners Margaret Angell (1:21:34), Alayne Adams (1:22:23) and Stephanie Gould (1:23:45) delivered one of the best team performances ever.  Unfortunately, Alayne was not scored and we had to cash in our insurance policy in Lauren Eckhart.  As a result, the open women's team placed second in the club scoring instead of first.  
   
  Coach Bob Glover from the Greater New York Running Team wrote: 

You stated: "As far as we can remember (and that would go as far back as 1988), this is the best showing of a Central Park Track Club women's half marathon team."   I remember back to 1975. This was indeed the best performance ever by a CPTC half marathon team. And considering the "traffic" they had to run through and the extra distance they had to run (pushed to the middle lane several times to pass the underachieving masses), their times were amazing. PRs for all I believe?

It appears that technically CPTC was second because one of your heroic runners somehow didn't put down the team name on the app. Our women agree with my decision to collect our first place team medals and turn them over to the team that rightfully won the race. We took it to the Orange in an effort to pull off a major upset. In just our 5th year as a grassroots program, we have yet to win a team point race. It almost worked, but your runners rose to the challenge. We certainly did not lose by going for broke---and the athletes chose individually to take that strategy. What was lost in minutes over the last miles was gained in pride over the next few years.

However, we won't give back the team points (even if we could). That is because the same thing happened to us at the Brooklyn Half. Our top runner somehow forgot to place the team name on the app and was not scored. It cost us two points to CPTC in the standings. So this evens things out.  One could argue that both these runners are team regulars so why shouldn't they count anyway. Unfortunately, not all teams are honest and in past years a lot of manipulation took place (mostly by you know who). Thus, the NYRR is quite firm on their rule. Scares the hell out of me every race.

The important thing is that both teams today are legit, were at full strength for present day fitness, and pushed each other to another level.  For that, we both are winners.

It was only at last Thursday's road workout that we were speaking with Lauren Eckhart, who was penalized four minutes for crossing the yellow line at the Wildflower Triathlon.  When we heard her story, we were able to quote from the top of our head what Sid Howard said in the event that was narrated in Famous Saying #1051, and which we publish again here.

#1051.  WHO:  Sid Howard
SITUATION:  At the 2000 USATF National Masters Outdoor Track & Field Championships in Eugene (Oregon), Sid was disqualified in the M60-64 800m finals for having stepped on the lane line more than 3 times.  Although he has been running for over twenty years, this has never occurred to him.  In this race, he crossed the finish line two seconds ahead of the runner-up, so that any advantage he might have gained is immaterial.  When the race director told him that he was disqualified ...
WHAT HE SAID: "You can change the outcome of the race, but you cannot change the performance.  I am satisfied with what I have done."

We have always said that we don't care if our team finishes first or twenty-ninth.  All that matters that our runners were happy with what they are doing.  This particular race will always be remembered for what our three runners did.  And it will also be remembered for the gracious things that Bob Glover and his Greater New York Running Team did and said about us.  We are all satisfied with what we have done and that is all that matters.

• A HISTORICAL FOOTNOTE:  Sadly, unscored runners still occur frequently but the rules are the rules ("To declare your team, put your team name on your race application. Even if you indicated your team with your NYRRC Membership information, you still need to declare your team on your application. If you are unsure whether you declared your team on your application, check the printed tag on your race number when you pick it up. Your team code should appear below your name. Changes and edits can be made at registration anytime prior to the start of the race. Changes to your team affiliation cannot be made after the race has started.").  But we thought that we would share a bizarre moment in history with you from the 1999 New York Road Runners Club Cross Country Championships.  

According to the race officials, our masters men's team won the second place award even though they finished in first place.  Sounds crazy, doesn't it?  This divergence occurred because the race officials decided to take a literal interpretation of the fine print on the entry form, to the effect that "all runners must include their team name on their application (in the team box) and runners who post-register must write their exact team name on the tear-off tag on their bib number in order to be scored properly."  

Our first finisher Stuart Calderwood arrived at the race to post-register, obtained an entry form that is identical in format to that used in other NYRRC races, failed to read the fine print on the back amidst the chaos, filled out the entry form with CPTC in the team box but did not write down CPTC on his bib.  Filling out the team box is sufficient in most other NYRRC races.  All the registration information is filled out in the front and the fine print appears only on the back with a lot of other rubbish (for example: read this --- "AGE VERIFICATION: In the event of age protest ($25.00 protest fee) only an original Birth Certificate, Baptismal Certificate, or Driver's License will be accepted."  May God help all you foreign-born pagan New Yorkers who don't drive!)

Subsequent to the race, the race official disallowed our first runner (Stuart Calderwood in third place with 3 points) and instead scored  another of our runners who finished in forty-ninth place (for 49 points), which meant that the Millrose team was able to win by 6 points.  At the same time, the same race officials did not deny that this same Stuart Calderwood is a member of the Central Park Track Club, as indicated and re-verified  in the team box on his correctly-filled-out entry form, and they posted the top individual results as such (see photo below).  Meanwhile, the team scoring posted nearby reflected something different.  The race officials said that they did not see this as a contradiction at all.  Living la vida loca?  And while we are at it, let us also point out that we found out that our second finisher Dan Sack (in 10th place) was not scored either.

Race results sheet posted after the race on the side of the NYRRC van at Van Cortlandt Park

When the Millrose team learned about this situation, they were very gracious and magnanimous, and we ended up swapping the first- and second-place medals between us.  Both teams informed the race officials that these two teams accept the fact that the Central Park Track Club team had won this race fair and square.  We don't care what those race officials will enter into the 'official' record, because this case is closed as far as these two teams are concerned.

Both the Central Park Track Club and the Millrose Athletic Association are long-time established running clubs in New York City with wonderful traditions.  Over our histories, we have won thousands of individual and team awards.  The placing in this particular race (and a non-scoring race too) is therefore immaterial to us in the grand scheme of things.  This is really about doing what is obviously the right thing.  The intransigence on the part of the NYRRC race officials in this matter is a sure way to kill the joy of running and leave a bitter taste about that organization.

So now you understand why this website has been so partial to Herbie Medina (who initiated that exchange) and the Millrose team.

• THE YOUNG ATHLETE: We hold our parties at the Parlor on the Upper West Side, courtesy of Jane Kenney whose women's soccer team is sponsored by the Parlor.  Through the soccer mom connection,  John Kenney has forwarded this letter to us: "Dear Manhattan Soccer Club families, As you know, Manhattan Soccer Club has distributed several  handouts by Dr. Jordan Metzl on topics such as injury prevention, strength training, hydration, concussion, etc. Dr. Metzl is co-founder and medical director of the Sports Medicine Institute for Young Athletes at the Hospital for Special Surgery.  More detailed information on these subjects is now available in Dr. Metzl's book "The Young Athlete," written with Carol Shookhoff, and just recently published by Little, Brown.  The book also covers other issues of interest to the club:  sportsmanship, effective coaching, nutrition and nutritional supplements, keeping a balanced perspective, sports and college admissions.   Dr. Metzl has been very generous with his time and expertise, conducting several injury-prevention workshops for MSC, and Carol Shookhoff has been an MSC parent since the club's inception. Yours in soccer, Bruce Millman MSC President."  To this note, John Kenney appends: "Jordan does a great job."  (Note:  This has been an unpaid announcement for Jordan, for future considerations such as putting down CPTC on race applications)
   

• BROTHER, CAN YOU SPARE SOME CHANGE?  The race results on this website are mostly culled from race websites.  These days, there are still races without websites.  In that case, we have to rely on people reporting in.  While people can report accurately for themselves, they will have to estimate the times for their teammates in the race.  This becomes somewhat imprecise unless they finished right next to each other.  Recently, for the Cinco de Mayo 5K in Prospect Park, we received the report that Toby Tanser ran "16 and change."  So how much is change?  16:01.  The benefit of doubt will always go to our team (hehehe).  On second thought, change somehow always mean four pennies whenever we don't carry change ...
    

• TRACK MEET OF THE WEEK:  Last week, it was the Albany Spring Classic.  This week, we move on to the Boston High Performance meet on May 18th (Saturday).  The current entry list (May 8th) is very short, but there will obviously many more people entered as this has been a very high quality meet in past years.  Meet entry will close at 6pm on Thursday, and the seed sheet will be posted by 6pm on Friday.
     

• SPRING COUPLES RELAY TIP:  Jonathan Cane wrote: "Margaret Schotte was great - 1st woman and 2nd overall on the run.  She trailed Jesse Lasner (who was obviously 1st overall) by just a few yards.  I had a pretty good ride and was able to open our lead a little on the bike.  We were ahead of two other teams by about 30 seconds going into the boat.  Unfortunately, the same team that beat us last year put a hurtin' on me again in the row boat.  We held on for 2nd place.  Looks like Margaret and I will be practicing our rowing (and/or sabotaging boats) before next year's race." 
   
  Let us offer this secret.  This is not about putting in training on rowing.  Nor is it about sabotaging boats.  It is about learning how to repair boats.  You are assigned a boat by the organizers.  So unless you bribe someone to give you a good boat, you are at the mercy of random chance.  Based upon our many years of observation, all boats are defective in one way or another.  The question is how to make the best of a bad situation.  This begins by making sure that you have the right repair kit.  Randy Ehrlich, who has won this event several times with different partners (and, according to our records, he still owes Audrey Kingsley a date), brings in shoes laces to fasten the oars.  So make sure that you plan ahead for all the contingencies, and then nothing can stop you even as all those people ahead of you flounder.
     

• WORLD CUP PICK:  We mean the WORLD cup, and not the WORLD series that is played solely among US teams.  Now we will not be stating our preferences as yet, since we have not seen all the rosters.  We have not polled Shula Sarner nor Steve Paddock because we are going to get partisan responses from them anyway (trust us --- Arsenal will NOT win the World Cup because this is a competition among nations).  But we read that Toby Tanser has made his pick --- Argentina!   Sorry, but somehow we don't think Ariel Ortega is the second coming of Diego Maradona.  Here is one set of current betting odds.   Somehow, if we had a dollar, we would put it on South Korea because we know all about the mythical host country advantage --- remember Roy Jones Jr. at the 1988 Seoul Olympics?  ¡Qué barbaridad!
    

• JONATHAN PILLOW:  Here is someone that we missed a lot (and not just because he runs fast).  This biosketch is amazing because we don't know of anyone else who can say that their majors were mathematics, French, African literature and psychophysics.  He says that he is currently training for the 2002 NYC Marathon.  Please, Jonathan, can't you just be satisfied with running some 5K/10K's for us!?
   

• THE GREAT CENTRAL PARK TRACK CLUB T-SHIRT GIVE-AWAY CONTINUES:  At next Tuesday's track workout, you can pick up the free t-shirts courtesy of David Pullman.  If you cannot make it to the workout, stay tuned to the website for alternate arrangements after this Tuesday.
    

• RIDGEWOOD RACES:  Each year on Memorial Day (Monday, May 27th this year), a series of races are held in Ridgewood, New Jersey.  The events are scheduled such that you can run the mile, the 5K as well as the 10K!  Let Sylvie Kimché ( Sylvie_Kimche@abercrombie.com ) know if you are going.  This is a flat, fast (and we mean flat, fast) course which should be especially appealing to those who are looking for a sub-16 minute (reading this, Steve Paddock and Craig Chilton?).
   

• ALLURE MOTHER'S DAY HALF MARATHON:  The NYRR listed our team result as 4-9-16 = 29 for second-place open team.  Our team runners were actually 4-5-9, which would have been the winning score.  We are pretty sure that there will be a revisit of this issue during the week.  While we are on this subject, it is not just we missed a runner but we also added a runner --- Shula Sarner was credited with 29:38 in the concurrent 5K race while carrying an all-over-the-place conversation with our photographer during the half marathon!  Way to go, Shula!  Goal!!!!!!!!!
   
  Our first three runners were Margaret Angell (1:21:34), Alayne Adams (1:22:23) and Stephanie Gould (1:23:45).  As far as we can remember (and that would go as far back as 1988), this is the best showing of a Central Park Track Club women's half marathon team.  Individually, Stephanie Gould's performance was yet another personal breakthrough, this year.  The coach had written down a predicted a 1:25:05 for her, while we told her personally that she would no longer surprise us unless she runs 1:21.  She came in between, and everyone is pleased.
   
  Tactically, the three set out at their own pace instead of running in a pack.  This was a long distance race on a cool day that was very humid, and it would be suicidal to start with an unsustainable pace.  To run together may mean that someone is going faster than they would want while someone else is running slower.  Worst yet, they may all be running faster than they should.  At the halfway mark, they were 6-7-8, essentially alone but still being able to see the others in front.  Towards the end, they picked up their pace and ended up 4-5-9.  
    
  Those were our three fittest runners for that distance today who were projected to lead the team.  For insurance, we had Lauren Eckhart (back from a half Ironman triathlon last weekend and a 55-mile bike ride yesterday), Audrey Kingsley (3:05 at the 2002 Boston Marathon in mid-April and taking it easy since then) and Shula Sarner ("I've been getting the best physical therapist in New York City working on me this year ...").  All three were not going to run at the pace of their ideal fitness levels, but they can be expected to put in competitive times.  Here are their respective times: 1:29:14 (16th place), 1:32:16 (25th place) and 1:32:20 (26th place).  Irene Jackson-Schon was second W50-54 too.
     

• ALBANY SPRING CLASSIC:  The three-word summary is this: "VERY VERY WINDY" so they can forget about PR times.  Although the race website lists Isaya Okwiya as running the 5,000m in 18:20, his actual time was 16:03 (5:08 min/mile), to which that ferocious wind must be factored in.
   

• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT:  It was a dreary day with an overhanging soupy fog.  No sooner than we thought about London fog when Colin Frew popped up, having arrived from London at 5pm and just in time for the workout.  Actually, he was plenty early for he had to listen to the whole twenty minute speech.  Colin looked around and said, "Ahem ... I think I know about a total of five people here today."  Afterwards, he asked, "Who was the guy leading in the workout?"  That would be Steve Paddock, also from London.  All roads lead to the Daniel Webster statue, from London and from Canada.
   
  The head count was forty-four people, of which there were five women.  Where are the rest of the women?  We hope that they are resting for the half marathon on Sunday.  Of the women present today, Lauren Eckhart will be running the half marathon.  Since she had just done the Wildflower long course triathlon (in 5:53:14, including a four minute penalty for crossing the yellow line) last Satuday, is this too soon?  She said, "I really did not do a lot of running in that race --- I was walking but I was still passing other people who were walking."  But before the half marathon on Sunday, she has a 55 mile bike ride set up for Saturday.  Is that too much on the day before?  She said, "No, I'll be riding easy."  Well, well, well, one way or the other, this one will go into the history books ...
   
  According to David Smith, the Wildflower Triathlon bike course was a loop of beautiful rolling hills through wine country but the run was not so nice because it was a trail run that was quite dusty from the recent dry weather.  The key feature was the rest stop at mile four of the run, where nude women handed out water.  His wife was not impressed.  Unbeknownst to David, a new teammate Nicole Billman finished less than 30 seconds behind him.  Bob Summers was also there while Erik Schmitz wished that he was there.
   

• SEARCH ENGINE TECHNIQUES:  The Central Park Track Club is a website primarily intended to serve its own member community.  Therefore, we are really not too interested in building massive traffic from the outside.  Nevertheless, we will have a reasonably high ranking on many Google searches, even on subjects that are completely unrelated to our club.  For example, we may be among the top results for certain races.  Just how Google does their ranking is cloaked in secrecy, which we accept as necessary to prevent unscrupulous people from exploiting loopholes.  We can still make some observations.  A couple of years ago, when Google first emerged, we could see that they were indexing our website once every two to three weeks.  That is to say, typing in "Central Park Track Club" would bring up a cached home page that may be as much as three weeks old.  Nowadays, Google is caching our home page almost instantaneously.  The lesson is as follows:  a search engine loves (and it ought to love) a website that produces fresh content every day, and we have been doing so day in and day out for the last five years.  In the end, it is not those titles, meta tags, repeated keywords, or fake links that should matter --- good content will always be rewarded.
     

• EXCUSES, EXCUSES: From Kevin Arlyck: "Dearest teammates, I have to apologize once again. Some of you may remember that after my last-minute cancellation of the Brooklyn Half-Marathon bagel breakfast, I promised to host you all at my apartment following the You Gotta Have Park 5-Miler. Well, a recently-revealed work obligation means that I will not be able to do so.  The only compensation I can offer is an invitation to join me and my students after the race at the Red Hook Waterfront Arts Festival on the suprisingly beautiful Brooklyn waterfront. Art, music, dance, poetry, and great views of the Statue of Liberty are on offer, plus a chance to see a part of NYC you probably didn't even know existed. For more information, visit www.dancetheatreetcetera.org/upcoming.html ."
    

• CLUB DUES:  There is laissez-faire and then there is Big Brother.  We have tried that first with a nice dues notice, and our coffers are brimming with the club dues that people have sent in so far.  But there are still a lot of you are there who are delinquent.  So we are going to come after you soon with the Big Stick.  For those who don't want to find out what that means (and yes, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police will be involved somewhere), here is the renewal information: Regular $75, Sponsor $100+, Couple $125, Student $25, Out-of-town $25, Inactive $25, Hardship $25.  Send checks to Central Park Track Club, c/o Richard Kixmiller, 14 East 96th Street, Apt 14, NY 10128.
   

• STEVE PADDOCK'S DREAM CAME TRUE:   Final score: Arsenal 1, Manchester United 0 on a goal by Sylvain Wiltord.  Arsenal wins the double --- the Premiership and the FA Cup this year.  Of course, the fall guy had to be an Argentine: Juan Sebastian Veron.
   
  On Tuesday, when asked "Are you going to take the day off to watch this game?", Steve Paddock said, "I'm taking the whole week off!"
   

• STYLE CRITIC:  You know that we have a publicly viewable email directory on this website.  This enables all sorts of unsavory characters to harvest those email addresses and spam you like crazy.  Here are two letters that we received on the same evening

Letter #1: 
"Sir

You may be surprised to receive this letter from me, since you do not know me personally.  I am Matt Tobi the son of Mr. Simon Tobi who was recently murdered in the land dispute in Zimbabwe.  I got your contact through network on line in search for a reliable and reputable person to handle a very confidential matter which involves transfer of fund to a foreign account.  My late father was among the few rich black zimbabwean farmers murdered in cold blood  by the agents of the ruling government of president Robert Mugabe, for his alleged support and sympathy for the Zimbabwean opposition party controlled by the white minority.

Before my father's death, and like he had already foreseen the looming danger in Zimbabwe, he had deposited the sum of twelve million five hundred thousand united state dollars (US$12.5 million) in a Trust and Finance company oversea till normacy return to Zimbabwe.This Fund was supposedly meant for purchases of new machinery and chemical products for Agro-allied farms and for the establishment of new farm in Lesotho.

This problems arose when President Robert Mugabe introduced a new land act that wholly affected the rich white farmers and some blacks vehemently condemned the "modus operandi" adopted by the government which resulted to rampant killings and mob action by the war veterans and some political thugs. Precisely more than three thousands (3,000) people have so far been killed. Heads of governments from the west, especially Britain and United states have voiced their condemnation of Mugabe's plans to no avail. It is against this background that I, as the eldest son of my father, and having made some reasonable contact with the Trust company where the fund currenetly is, decided to seek a genuine foreign partner who can assist me in transfering this fund from the Trust company since I have all the documents that relates to the fund and was refered to as the next of kin.

I am now looking for somebody on whom I can entrust this fund, and help invest this fund in a risk free and profitable ventures.I am ready to offer you 20% of the fund, if you are ready to assist me. And I await your response to enable me give you the full details of the transaction.

Best Regards,

Matt Tobi"
 
Letter #2: 
"Sir,
URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

Firstly, i have to introduce myself to you.My name is Dr.Chakaodza Tendayi from Zimbabwe.i was the chairman of contract review panel in my country before the problem of the land reform program.  Before the escalation of the situation in Zimbabwe i recovered $26.8million US dollars from over inflated contracts by some government officials.But i was a member of the opposition party the MDC(Movement for Democratic Change).And the ruling party,(ZANU PF) has been against us.So i had to flew the country for a neighbouring African Country which i am currently residing.

But before the escalation of the situation in Zimbabwe i had not reported the recovery of my findings in the panel.So this money was in my posession and i lodged it in a security company here in Africa and currently this money has been moved to thier security branch in Amsterdam, in the Netherlands.  i have been trying to fly to Europe but it has been difficult for me get a visa from Africa.So i want you to help me make claims of this fund($26.8m) in the Netherlands as my beneficiary and transfer the money to your account or any account of your choice before I can get a visa to fly down.  So that we can share this money. 

I have agreed to give you 10%,which would be ($2.6m dollars) of this money for your assistance, and 80% would be mine and the other 10% would be set aside for any expenses that may incurre during the course of this transaction.And my 80% would be invested in your country in any profitable business propossed by you.

I know i have nevr meet you,but i want to trust you and please do not let me down when this funds finally gets into your account.Please if you are intersted, get to me through the email address below to enable me feed you with more details and all neccessary documentations.Please treat this as confidential. 

Regards,

Dr.Chakaodza Tenday."

Point #1:  The English is the first letter is undoubtedly more fluent, but does that make it more effective?  Would the awkwardness in the second letter make it more authentic?
Point #2:  The second letter immediately offers $2.6 million dollars to the recipient, compared with the vague promise in the first letter.  Is the directness a drawback because it seemed presumptuous.  
Point #3:  Like many other people, we have multiple email accounts to compartmentalize our lives.  These two emails went to webmaster@zonaeuropa.com, in which the identity of the individual account holder is not disclosed because it is irrelevant for any purpose.  Therefore, the idea that the address was obtained by any referral is absurd.

• THE GREAT CENTRAL PARK TRACK CLUB T-SHIRT GIVE-AWAY:
  At the end of the workout today, all members were invited to take one of the new orange t-shirts.  The big t-shirt giveaway will continue next week.  So if you miss this week's workout, please make sure that you come next week.  Is it possible that anything can be free these days?  Of course.  These t-shirts come to you courtersy of David Pullman, and one sleeve carries the logo of Pullman, Inc. You can click on the logo below to reach the company website.

The Pullman website carries an interesting story about a lawsuit filed against Prudential.  If (and when) Pullman wins that lawsuit, our sponsorship package will probably go much more beyond the t-shirts.  So let's keep our fingers crossed ... 

• WELCOME NEW MEMBERS:  Accepted at this month's Central Park Track Club board meeting yesterday were:
  Jeff Aronis
  Nicole Billman
  Julie Buck
  Sean Fitzpatrick
  Joseph Kozusko
  Vram Malek
  Tom Rodman
   
  Our question of the day:  "Where is Laura Lee (sp)?"
   

• MOTHER'S DAY HALF MARATHON:  This is a women's club scoring race.  At the Tuesday's workout, we ran a quick headcount as to see who is going to be racing.  As with these long distance races, we may be short-handed.  So let the coach Tony Ruiz know if you are running.  This race has some importance, as we are presently the leaders in the open women competition.  For this race, we know that our two team leaders will be there --- Margaret Angell and Alayne Adams.  In the case of the Alayne, let us state our appreciation that for the second year in a row she has to come out on Mother's Day to run a half marathon, purely for the sake of the team and definitely not for her own enjoyment.  Alayne is a mother of three kids, and really deserves to have breakfast in bed instead!  We will not desist from lobbying until the club scoring race schedulers get it into their heads that a half marathon on Mother's Day is cruel and unusual.
    

• TUESDAY WORKOUT REPORT:  Sixty-three people were at the road runners' workout and twelve people at the sprinters' workout (including Phil Carpenter Lee coming back).  The middle distance runners' workout had been moved to Monday because they are travelling this Friday to the Albany Spring Classic.  We counted Richie Stewart, looking way too cool in street clothes.  Our timers today were Jeff Wilson, Josh Feldman, Dion Mulvihill and Paul Sinclair.  Your workout reporter was once again reduced to half-spectatorship as he has not been getting enough sleep due to overworking.  This is the current impression of him.

 
Question:  How do you know someone is a track novice?
Answer:  When she doesn't know which direction the gate at the East River Park entrance turned.
Her comments: "I was hoping nobody saw that ..."
 
Question:  How do you know Herbie Medina has been visiting Toby Tanser's website too often?
Answer:  When he addresses someone as 'Sir Roland.'
P.S.  Although Herbie thanked us for getting rid of the Godfather music, we must say that we cannot claim credit.

• WEEKEND RACE RESULT 'WINS': James Siegel says, "I'm glad to hear that people win by not having their weekend result located by the website.  Well, there was something that I did two weeks ago that has not appeared yet ..."  The Zen koan asks, "What is the sound of falling leaves in the still of a forest when there is no one to hear it?"  Answer: Loser!
   
  When we floated the idea, we had mentioned the Mount Penn Mudfest, which took place on March 31 but which we linked one month later as an example of how we will catch up with people, sooner or later.  G'mo Rojas wrote: "Hats off to you!  I thought you missed us at Mudfest.  I think I fell on my face four times, twisted my ankle at mile 2 and then sprained it with a 1/2 mile to go.  About ten people passed me at the end, it was very embarrassing....."
   

• STEVE PADDOCK HAD A DREAM: ... that Arsenal would march into Old Trafford, beat Manchester United and win the double ...  
   

• ARGENTINA'S WORLD CUP TEAM ROSTER:   Twelve players have been named to the team --- two players from the national club champion River Plate and 10 players who play in Europe, most of them quite familiar through those RAI-broadcast Serie A games:
  Defenders: Jose Chamot (AC Milan), Mauricio Pochettino (Paris St Germain), Walter Samuel (AS Roma).
  Midfielders: Diego Simeone (Lazio), Javier Zanetti (Inter Milan), Marcelo Gallardo (Monaco), Ariel Ortega (River Plate), Claudio Husain (River Plate).
  Forwards: Claudio Caniggia (Rangers), Gabriel Batistuta (AS Roma), Hernan Crespo (Lazio), Claudio Lopez (Lazio)
   
  Why were we so interested in Argentina's roster?  Because we wanted to know if the infamous Aldo Duscher (Deportivo Coruña) made it.  You will recall that Duscher was the guy who took out English captain David Beckham last month in a Champions League game.  Here was the Buenos Aires newspaper Clarín's report: "Indignación, decepción, ira, esperanza. Las pulsaciones de los hinchas ingleses se dispararon a mil por hora al enterarse de que la participación del niño mimado David Beckham en el Mundial estaba en grave peligro. La fractura en el pie izquierdo sufrida por el volante del Manchester hizo estallar palabras y sensaciones. Y también algunas explosiones de chauvinismo deportivo que apuntaron los dardos a la nacionalidad argentina del 'victimario' Aldo Duscher."  Of course, conveniently forgotten by the English press was that extremely stupid tackle by David Beckham on Diego Simeone in the 1998 World Cup.  Simeone was not evenly remotely near the goal and Beckham got a red card for his troubles.  Right now, it looks like Beckham will indeed recover in time for this World Cup.  On June 7, in Group F, Argentina meets England at Sapporo.  We shall see if Beckham, Simeone and Duscher show up ... 
     

• BRUCE MANDELBAUM:  From Frank Handelman: "I am writing to recommend the acupuncture practice of longtime CPTC member Bruce Mandelbaum, who just helped me get through the Penn Relays. My left hamstring was very tight for several weeks, so that I couldn't do any real speed work prior to the 4x400 relay on April 26th. I procrastinated, but finally got over to see Bruce two days before the race. If I couldn't run, there would be no 50+ team as we had no alternates - the team would have to scratch. Bruce didn't want to do any drastic treatment that soon before the race, so he did what he called mild acupuncture and then some light massage. After a sore night, it felt much better Thursday, and was no problem Friday in the race (only problems were my lack of speed work and lack of speed, period).

  So I highly recommend Bruce, as well as his colleague and suitemate, Dr. Eugenie Tartell, a certified sports chiropractor with a holistic approach who has also helped me enormously over the last few years - she is now treating me for tendonitis in my bicep (don't laugh, these things happen when a life-long middle distance runner tries to evolve into an age-group sprinter).  Their offices are at 2121 Broadway, above Fairway, 4th floor. Bruce is at (212) 769-4295, and Eugenie at (212) 496-1630.