WEEK OF DECEMBER 24 - DECEMBER 30, 2002

• INDIVIDUAL ROAD RACE WINNERS [12/31/2002]  The list of our individual road race winners during 2002 is shown at the top of the results page.  The year is not ended yet, and there is one more realistic chance at a race near Pittsburgh but we don't know yet.  So far, we had 41 individual wins or events that involve some form of running (thus including the duathlons/biathlons and triathlons) open to all (thus excluding the PSAL races for high schoolers).  Not all these wins are of equal 'quality' but a win is a win.  
   
  If we have to identify the most impressive wins in the sense of good times against strong competitors, we would nominate Alayne Adams at the two scoring races (Fred Lebow XC 5K and the Staten Island Half Marathon), Margaret Angell at the Joe Kleinerman 10K and the duo of Olivier Baillet and Stefani Jackenthal at the Survivial of the Shawangunks.  Of those five wins, we were privileged to be present at two of those.  Very exhilirating, indeed!  At the cross country race, everybody was craning their necks to see who would appear first from the hilles and before we saw anyone, we heard Stuart Calderwood yelled out, "Alayne is going to win the race!" (see movie).  It was all the more exhilirating because that was a very, very long straightway run to the finish.  At the Joe Kleinerman 10K, the interesting question was whether Margaret Angell would catch all those alpha males on the team (see photo) ...
     

• TOP 10 FAVORITE PHOTOS OF 2002 [12/30/2002]  This annual selection has a team theme this year, as this is our 30th year.  By the way, there are actually 11 photos instead of the announced 10.
   

• MORE MAC HOLIDAY CLASSIC REPORTS [12/30/2002]  
   
  The meet started an hour late (there was a youth meet in the A.M.), and "quickly" proceeded to run 2 hours behind. MAC.
  Sid Howard was there to cheer, and recruit. Good for him, and us.
  Some of us were first or second in our age group. Some were not.
  Some of us were first in our own minds. Some who were first in their minds were not.
  Some who ran well do not think so, some think they ran well but did not.
  Some can quote from the official list of excuses, some do not know it exists.
  Most wore team uniforms, therefore some did not.
  All seemed glad to run. Ahhh..., the sport and beauty of it.

  We had intermediate 800m and 1600m for our two female 3000m runners.
   

• THE ASHES #4 (DAY FIVE) [12/30/2002]  It is over.  In the second innings, Australia went 5-107 to win by 5 wickets in the morning session.  Everybody (the teams, the press and the fans) will now move from Melbourne to Sydney for the fifth and final match right after New Year's Day.  The series now stands at 4-0.  Odinarily, a target of 107 runs should be notional for any first-class team, but it turned out to be harder precisely because it was a low total.  Instead of playing one's best, one plays safe.  Given the compressed time frame, the understaffed English bowlers also knew that they did not need to preserve their strength for a whole day's play.
   
  Meanwhile, this Ashes story is not even the top cricket story of the day anymore.  The burning question of the day is, Should England go and play in the World Cup next February in Zimbabwe, where the local government is accused of starving the population for political gains.  Once upon a time when we lived in Australia, the burning question of the day was, Should Australia play rugby/cricket in South Africa, the land of apartheid?  In those days, the sports authorities insisted that sports transcend politics.  South Africa could not tour Australia because public safety would be endangered due to the expected massive protests.  Instead, the Australia rugby and cricket teams toured South Africa.  Even if the sports people sincerely believed that they were engaging in pure sports, those tours unquestionably served to bolster the image of the apartheid regime.  Today, the situation in England is not the same.  On one hand, 10 Downing Street prefers the cricketers not to go but insists that it has no authority to force that decision.  On the other hand, the cricketers would rather have the politicians make an essentially political decision instead of asking these cricketers to become instant experts on world hunger and politics.  
    
  In track and field, the apartheid issue was not as traumatic as in rugby/cricket back then.  Still, the most famous incident was when a group Americans, including javelin thrower Tom Petranoff and middle-distance runner Ruth Wysocki, went on a bandit tour of South Africa.  For that one paycheck, Wysocki received a four year ban from competition (remember, Ben Johnson received a two year ban for using steroids).  Wysocki is a top masters competitor today, holding several American records (800m, 1500m, 5000m).
   

• ANTS [12/29/2002]  The sad part about the last week of the year is that there does not appear to be much to write about running.  This has always been the case.  But over here, we never lack anything to say.  So we will turn out attention to a puzzling statement in last Tuesday's track workout report in which the workout reporter claimed that he was late in filing his report due to  'applications, finals, ants ants ants everywhere . . . '  We know that Paul Bendich teaches mathematics and chess, so having to deal with applications and finals at the end of year is understandable.  But what about ants?
   
  We don't know what Paul's ant problems are.  But, as we like to say around here, "You got your problems and we've got our own problems."  Our problem right now happens to be related to ants.  We are shopping around for an optimisation algorithm to solve a difficult combinatorial problem, and it turns out that ant colony optimisation methods are currently in vogue.  Since we are snobs, we will give you the theoretical foundations of ant colony optimisation in French: "La principale qualité des insectes dits sociaux, fourmis ou abeilles, est de faire partie d'un groupe auto-organisé dont le maître mot est la simplicité. Tous les jours, les fourmis résolvent des problèmes complexes grâce à une somme d'interactions simples entre chaque individu. Par exemple, en suivant la piste de phéromones laissée par une de ses congénères, une fourmi est capable de prendre le chemin le plus court pour se rendre du nid à la nourriture. Le repérage est facile mais le choix nettement moins. Guy Theraulaz, spécialiste du comportement et des mours des animaux, a observé ce phénomène chez les colonies de fourmis d'Argentine, Linepithema humile pour les intimes. Il leur a proposé deux branches, l'une nettement plus courte que l'autre, pour aller faire leurs provisions. Dans un premier temps, les fourmis, qui ne se prennent pas pour madame Irma, font un choix aléatoire. Mais celles qui empruntent la branche la plus courte vont plus vite et font un plus grand nombre d'allers-retours entre le nid et la nourriture. Progressivement, la quantité de phéromones augmente sur ce chemin. Le message est passé, les fourmis décodent que c'est le plus court. Elles optimisent ainsi leurs déplacements."  The applications of ant colony optimisation are many, including this one: "Aujourd'hui, les banques peuvent trier leurs clients comme les fourmis leurs cadavres. Un principe pas très engageant mais qui fonctionne."  What an imagery!!!  We'll remember that the next time we walk into a bank.
    

• THE ASHES #4 (DAY FOUR) [12/29/2002]  England resumed batting at 111-2 and continued to score 387 runs near the end of day.  That was a decent effort, and it will be the first time this series that they managed not to lose by an innings.  Today, the pitch was rubbery and lifeless as it has lost the lively bounce of a new pitch but not yet broken up.  And as it was hotter than 100 degrees out there, it was tough going for the bowlers and fielders.  The English star was once again Michael Vaughan with 145 runs.  At the end of the day, Australia came out to bat for two more overs. Here is the excitement as reported by the Guardian: "Caddick raps Langer on the pad first ball and it's a very close shout. Umpire Tiffin judges that it hit Langer too high on the leg and Caddick counters by arguing that Langer only has short legs. Of course the Barmy Army's shout for the lbw is deafening. Caddick ends proceedings by wiping his nose on his sleeve." At close of play, Australia has eight runs without loss, and needing only 100 runs to win over the course of one full day tomorrow.
   
  Now you ask, "How can you be writing about this cricket match that is taking place on the other side of the world?"  Remember that this is the Internet age, and we were listening to the live broadcast on Australia's national network Nine, including all the singing.
     

• MAC HOLIDAY CLASSIC [12/29/2002]  Thanks to the diligence of Bola Awofeso, we are now the only outfit in this universe who has race results for this meet (see the Results page on this website).  But if you are not a member of the Central Park Track Club, you are out of luck.  What is not recorded is which of our runners got personal bests, and there might be quite a few (Glen Carnes, for sure) since they have never run 300m's, 600m's or 1000m's.  
    

• WHERE IN THE WORLD IS TOBY TANSER?  [12/29/2002]  Tanser.org will be closed temporarily until January 8th.  Where in the world is the man?  The details are here, but you may have to learn to read Icelandic first ...
   
  
   

• MONDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT #1 [12/28/2002]  The Armory was closed on Christmas Eve (12/24), and therefore the regular track workout was moved to Monday.  The first report comes from Jonathan Cane:

"I believe that there were three interlopers (Paul Bendich's word - I work in a gym so I don't know such fancy, multi-syllabic words) from the Long Distance group mixed in with the Middle Distance runners. We successfully snuck past the Armory guards despite the fact that we were 1.5 hours early, so it would seem that Noah Perlis' generous collection helped.

The Middle Distance group's workout was faster and shorter than we're accustomed to.  Only 1.5 miles worth of intervals, but all at mile pace. Since they do a timed recovery, my patented jog-your-recovery-as-slowly-as-humanly-possible, tie-your-shoelaces-and-take-a-leisurely-sip-of-water-so-that-you-get-more-rest trick was of no use. All in all, the workout was very intense, but mercifully brief.

In addition, Stacy Creamer was in attendance - watching Kieran while Stuart ran. She ran after Stuart's workout. Take three guesses as to which oxygen starved, Jewish-guilt ridden Long Distance runner stayed and accompanied her through her workout because he felt like he needed more miles." 

We are still waiting for Paul Bendich's report, already way past due date.  If it doesn't come in soon, we threaten to make up one of our own.  

• THE ASHES #4 (DAY THREE) [12/28/2002]  On the third day of the test match at Melbourne Cricket Ground, England was all out for 270 runs at the end of the afternoon session.  This is a modest total, with the key contributor being Craig White at 84 not out.  Unfortunately, that still leaves England 281 runs behind Austalia's first innings score.  Aussie captain Steve Waugh forced the follow-on (definition: "In a full two-innings game, where the team batting second is asked to bat again because its first innings total is far behind that of the other team").  At the end of today's play, England was 111-2 in their second innings.  Tomorrow, the Aussie bowlers will start fresh.  It would not appear that England has any chance of winning, since they would have to overcome that big first innings deficit, accumulate a reasonable lead and then get the Aussies out.  The chances for a draw are not good either, since they cannot play defensive cricket for two more days against those 97 mph fast balls.  Ah, but help is on the way for this five-day match, as thunderstorms are in the forecast for the last two days!
   
  Cricket is a funny sport in that there are some rules as to how one may pitch a ball.  Specifically, a crooked elbow is illegal.  Brett Lee of Australia was cited once upon a time for an illegal pitch, but he was cleared after a special committee of 10 professional bowlers was convented, examined the films and passed his action 10-0.  But that did not stop the English fans (known as the Barmy Army) at the Melbourne Cricket Ground from chanting "No ball!" each time that he bowled a ball.  That may satisfy the fans, but the last thing the English team wants is a riled-up fast bowler.  Justin Langer, the Australian star in their first inning with 250 runs, said:"These people stand behind a fence drinking beer with most of them 50 kilos overweight making ridiculous comments.  It's easy for someone to say that from behind a fence, they're within their rights because they've paid their money, but there's still some integrity in life, I think."
   
  The Barmy Army is quite unlike the British hooligans that run amok in soccer matches.  These cricket fans as better known for frequenting the pubs and singing at the test matches.  From the Guardian: "One of the current favourites on their hymn sheet, sung to the tune of He's Got the Whole World in His Hands, celebrates the imbalance in the exchange rate between the two countries, climaxing with the line: "For every pound, we've got three dollars in our hands.  Another, to the tune of Yellow Submarine, employs the chorus: 'You all live in a convict colony.' Many end with the Barmy Army standing en masse, pointing at the Australian team and shouting: 'You're the convicts!'"
    

• FAMILY SAYINGS [12/27/2002]  From the inside jacket of this book, we read: "Lessico Famigliare is a penetrating account of family life.  It asks to be read as fiction, though the author, one  of Italy's finest contemporary novelists, admits that it is autobiographical in a very strict sense.  She grew up in Turin in an intellectual, radical, assimilated Jewish family.  Her book spans the period of the rise of Fascism, the Second World War (in which Natalia Ginzburg's first husband perished at the hands of the Nazis) and its immediate aftermath.  The subject of her book is the other people in her family.  She herself is a witness, a seismograph, a recording angel."
   
  Yes, but so what?  What has that got to do with us?  Just look up to the top of your browser and you see that this page is titled: The Journal: The Life and Times of the Central Park Track Club.  The next sentence in the book jacket is: "The book is woven around the inconsequential, revealing remarks that are repeated in a family until they become an affectionate private code, rich in memory and association."  So do you see where this is leading?  Better yet, we will let you read the author's preface:

The places, events and people in this book are all real.  I have invented nothing.  Every time that I have found myself inventing something in accordance with my old habits as a novelist, I have felt impelled at once to destroy everything thus invented.

The names are real also.  In writing this book, I could not endure the thought of inventing anything, and therefore I could not alter the actual names, which I felt were an inseparable part of actual persons.  Some may possibly not be pleased to find themselves described under their own names.  To them I have nothing to say.

I have set down only what I myself could recall.  Consequently if this book is read as a chronicle of events it may be objected that there are omissions.  Although the book is founded on reality, I think it should be read as thought it were a novel, that is, read without demanding of it either more or less than what a novel can offer.

There are also happenings which I have remembered but have passed over in writing this book.  Among them is much which concerned myself directly.

I have had no great wish to speak of myself, since this story is not in fact my own but rather, in spite of all its gaps and omissions, the record of my family.  I may add that ever since my childhood and adolescence I have always intended to write a book which would tell the story of the people who lived through these times with me.  This is to some extent that book, but only to some extent, because memory is treacherous and books founded on reality are so often faint reflections and sketches of all that we have seen and heard.

• THE ASHES #4 (DAY TWO)  [12/27/2002]  Australia took their overnight score of 356-3 to 551-6 in the first two sessions.  Aussie captain Steve Waugh disappointed by scoring only 15 more runs, thus putting a cloud on his future.  This is one of those luxuries when a man goes out and scores 77 runs, and is considered not good enough.  That is because his potential replacement Martin Love came on and was 62 not out.  The star of the match was Justin Langer, who compiled a career-high 250 runs.  Strategically, there was no chance that Australia would bat through their entire line-up.  Their last authentic threat was wicketkeeper Adam Gilchrist, who is known for getting tons of runs in a hurry.  Today, Gilchrist went out quickly and Australia immediately declared right before tea.  After resumption, England slumped to 97-3.  During that spell, Brett Lee tossed the fastest pitch (97 mph) recorded in test history (note: they did not have the equipment until recent years).  
   
  The interesting thing about cricket is that this is a sport that is torn between its origins as a gentleman's sport and its present status as entertainment with tremendous commercial payouts.  A gentleman would never be cited for "using language that is obscene, offensive or insulting and/or the making of an obscene gesture"as English bowler Andy Caddick was.  A good sportsman would have started walking if he felt that he was out.  A professional would have stood his ground and refused to move until the umpires told him in no uncertain terms.  So on Day One, Steve Waugh edged a ball to Mark Butcher, who confessed that he believed that the ball touched the ground first.  The rest of the English team appealed to the umpires, who returned a 'not out' verdict.  Waugh went over to shake hands with Butcher, and there were also some post-game praises from the Australian team members afterwards.  On Day Two, Steve Waugh edged another ball which was caught.  When the umpires upheld the appeal, he stood his ground for a while and then left reluctantly.  When English captain Nasser Hussain came on to bat, he took a big cut and the ball was apparently caught.  Again, he was as stationary as a granite rock, and the Australians were livid.  As the commentators were saying, cricket is one sport and walking is a completely different sport for elderly ladies ... 
   

• HOLMDEL PARK CROSS COUNTRY COURSE RECORD [12/27/2002]  At the USATF National Masters 5K Cross Championship last month in Holmdel (NJ), Sylvie Kimché set a new women 55-59 record of 23:00.  The previous record was 23:46, so the verb 'shattered' is appropriate.  You will also find some more Central Park Track Club people on that list: Janice Morra, Stacy Creamer, Sandra Olivo, Mary V. Rosado, Sid Howard, Guenter Erich, Jim Sutton, ...
   

• THE GATES [12/27/2002]  The proposed project by Christo (not Cipro or Citron!) and Jeanne-Claude drew some more comments.  One suggestion is that we just have to cut a deal with them somehow to get some fabric for new uniforms.  Meanwhile, we link the website for the Gates project so y'all can read more about this project.
   
  
   

• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT [12/26/2002]  This is St. Stephen's Day, but better known as Boxing Day.  Given that this is an official Canadian holiday, how many people do you think will show up at the workout right after a snowstorm?  For a while, we were threatening to breach the all-time low of 12 people once upon a night with one foot of ice on the road.  Eventually, by waiting long enough, we arrived at the final count of 19 people.  Next week, though, we expect to see a much larger turnout due to the double impact of the guilt factor (over-eating over the holidays) and the New Year resolution effect.  
   
  In Jay Borok's words, it was actually a beautiful night to be running outside.  The snow had been ploughed away, including even the 102nd Street transverse.  The temperature was decent, with not much wind-chill to speak of.  All around the park, there were very few people and quite tranquil.
   
  Before the runners took off, the coach read the riot act about hogging up the roadway.  Yes, we may be the Central Park Track Club but we don't actually own the roads.  Nevertheless, we will simply observe that when these 19 people started the workout, they drifted slowly into 11-runners-wide and hogging up two-and-a-half lanes.  And that coach was leading the way!  Looks like we will have to start designating responsible people as monitors for each group ... 
   
  The track workout reporter wanted to know if a Monday workout report was required.  Of course!  Now where the hell is it?  We need a complete history of the club, so nothing must be missing.  And if this report does not appear soon, we are going to have to make one up ourselves.
   
  Tonight's workout is the last road workout of the year.  There is still one more track workout next Monday (630pm) before everything is wrapped up.  As for those who are contemplating about doing the Midnight Run, the coach said, "Ah, don't worry about tapering off for that race.  I don't think anyone is going to take it too seriously."  No, $500 for the winner means that someone is going to take it seriously.
   

• THE ASHES #4 (DAY ONE) [12/26/2002]  Here we go again, this time in Melbourne.  Australia won the toss and elected to bat first.  The day ended with a mammouth score of 356-3 for Australia.  Due to injuries, both sides had to make some line-up adjustments.  England ended up with just 3-and-1/2 legitimate bowlers, which explains why the butchery is taking place.  Australia lost their 'greatest in history' spinner Shane Warne due to a dislocated shoulder, which might have given England a sliver of hope before the match.  But the more exciting news must surely be that Aussie Darren Lehrmann had to rest due to a leg infection, and this means that Martin Love finally gets to play for the national side.  As a member of the second-string team (Australia "A"), Love has averaged 200 runs against England so far ... yes, that's correct --- 200 run average!  and that is a Sir Donald Bradman-like statistic (in baseball terms, Bradman was the guy who hit .800 average and 140 home runs per year over his career, good enough to receive a knighthood).  Already 356 runs have been scored, and Love has not even batted yet.  The other major subtext is that Australian captain Steve Waugh has been told that his job on the line, in spite of his team's brilliant performance under his captaincy.  How is that for gratitude and appreciation?  But of course we know that this is nothing personal, just business.  At the end of today's play, Waugh was not out at 62 runs, having reached 50 in just 49 balls including 10 boundaries (in baseball terms, out of the 49 strikes thrown at him, he hit 10 'singles' and 10 'doubles' that reached the wall).  Day two to follow.  What will Steve Waugh do?  You can bet that he will not declare the innings until he is out himself because he needs a massive personal score to impress the selectors, who have seen that massive crowd ovation when he entered.  And after that next out, England will have to face Martin Love just when they are tired and bruised. 
   

• MAC HOLIDAY CLASSIC [12/25/2002]  The second indoor meet of the season will take place on Saturday (12/28).  Since the official results of the MAC Season Opener are nowhere in sight, it would seem that self-help is our only recourse for now.  So we ask our people to record their times (as well as their teammates) and send them to us.
   

• RACE START [12/25/2002]  The NYRR board member with the responsibility for monitoring race quality got some feedback about the situation at the start of the race.  Specifically, this concerns the fact that there were slow runners who line up at the very front and thereby impede the progress of the faster runners trapped behind.  This is a perennial problem, and will worsen if these races get even more popular.  In a big race like the New York City Marathon, it is possible to have corrals based upon predicted times, but only if there are many weeks after closing out race entry to work out those assignments.  In the smaller  (note: typically 2,000 to 3,000 finishers) NYRR races, that would be impossible due to the large number of late entries.  This is somewhat ameliorated by separate gender race starts in the bigger and important races (e.g. Snowflake 4M and Club Championships).  No obvious solution exists (or else they would have been in place already), and the issue is really about protecting one's self-interests under these circumstances.
   
  When we first saw the results from the Joe Kleinerman 10K, we bit our tongues (but we never ever curse, of course).  Here are the top 10 female finishers.
   

  Place	Name	Team	Official Time	Net Time
  1	Margaret Angell	CPTC	35:49	35:48
  2	Maria Alve Vieira	WSX	36:25	36:22
  3	Alayne Adams	CPTC	37:20	37:18
  4	Catriona O'Mahony		37:59	37:57
  5	Margaret Schotte	CPTC	38:03	37:48
  6	Catherine Stone		38:33	38:32
  7	Bec Wassner	MCNY	39:02	38:56
  8	Yumi Ogita	CTPC	39:19	39:03
  9	Jean Chodnicki-Stemm	WS	39:35	39:33
  10	Fiona Bayly	UATH	39:45	39:43

  Somewhere, we have forgotten to issue the 'use your sharp elbows to get a fair start' instructions to our runners.  Among the top 10 female finishers, Yumi Ogita had a 16 second gap and Margaret Schotte had a 15 second gap between their clock and chip times.  No one else had more than a 6 second gap.  With a fair and equal start, we should have been 1-3-4-7 instead of 1-3-5-8.  This does not change the team standings, but good talent is being wasted.  Next time, we know that we will have to do what we have to do.  After all, our women have to maintain their reputation as wild elbow-swingers who pick fights with men twice their size ... (Quick quiz: How many seconds did it take you to come up with that name!?  Hint: TX)
   

• SAFFRON [12/24/2002]  The current hot topic about Central Park is the proposal by the artists Christo and Jeanne-Claude to erect about 7,400 gates draped in saffron-colored fabric.  What is the color saffron?  Would you believe --- it's just like ... ORANGE!?  Below are renditions of what the park might look like.  Lovely, isn't it?
   
      

WEEK OF DECEMBER 17 - DECEMBER 23, 2002

• ROAD RACE SCHEDULE 2003 [12/23/2002]  We now have the beginnings of the road race schedule for next year online.  This schedule is culled from a number of different soruces, and covers the local races as well as the more prominent national/international races.  As time progresses and more race dates are published, this race calendar will be updated.
   

• SPAM, SPAM, SPAM [12/23/2002]  Generally speaking, people do not like to read corporate press releases.  Why not?  Because they are usually self-serving and conniving in content, and turgid and opaque in style.  But we have recently found a delightful exception on the website for SPAM luncheon meat.  Not that this page would serve as a vigorous proponent of  this mysterious concoction to an audience of runners who presumably lead healthy lifestyles.  Rather, this is SPAM's explanation of their position with respect to spam, which is the common name for unsolicited commercial email.  The objective circumstances would be that SPAM is the aggrieved party, since their trademark was malappropriated to denote a universally despised category courtesy of a Monty Python skit.  Their response is concise and reasoned, and absolutely delivers.  
    

• TAKING CONTROL? [12/23/2002]  We were re-reading Dan Schiller's Digital Capitalism.  This was published in 1998 and it is outdated in the rapidly changing digital age.  For example, AOL.com was still spoken of in admiring terms.  Somewhere in the middle of the book, there is an excerpt of a speech by Edwin Artzt, then CEO of Proctor & Gamble, to the American Association of Advertising Agencies:

Advertising started in print.  When radio came along and we all had to buy time as well as space --- and sell with words and music and no pictures --- we, the advertising industry, took control of the environment.

We created programming.  We molded the environment to fit our needs.  We were no longer dealing just with newspapers and magazines that people bought and read everyday.  We had to create listener loyalty to programming we sponsored.  We created soaps, comedy shows, variety shows, and mysteries.  We made listening to radio every Sunday night a family institution.

There were days when the advertising industry grabbed technology change in its teeth and made it the greatest selling tool every conceived ...

Now, we're going to have to grab technology in our teeth again and make it work for us.  But it isn't going to be as simple as it was to adapt to radio or TV, where everything favored the advertiser.  Now, we've got competition, not just among traditional, ad-supported media but from unadvertised programming, as well --- entertainment and information that will represent  an entirely separate source of revenue for media suppliers and programmers alike.

This is the real threat.  These new media suppliers will give consumers what they want, and potentially at a price they're willing to pay.  If user fees replace advertising revenue, we're in serious trouble. 

Today, reality may have turned out even worse than was imagined back then.  It is true that the subscription fee model has failed by and large.  But the technology has advanced far enough that it is dirt cheap to operate a website today.  There are now numerous websites that depend on neither subscription nor advertising.  Case in point: the Central Park Track Club website.  Last month, this website received 1,234 user sessions per day for an average duration of 8 minutes 43 seconds.  The total time spent on this website was (30 days) x (1,234 user sessions per day) x (8 minutes 43 seconds per user session) = 5,378 hours.  Given the nature of this website, these are fully attentive time spent by people who were engaged with the content.  We do not extract subscription fees from our users and we do not accept advertising (note: we do provide free space to our friends).  While we have an Amazon.com affiliate program, it is mostly for fun.  But at $14.95 per month, we can afford to run this website indefinitely into the future in this manner.  If the aggregation of such websites accounts for more and more of people's time, where does that leave the big advertisers now?

• SAVE ST. JOHN'S TRACK & FIELD PROGRAM [12/22/2002]  One of the oldest college track & field programs in New York City will be dropped.  There is an online petition to save this program.  As of today, there are over 2,400 signatures already.
   

• METROPOLITAN COLLEGE OF NEW YORK [12/22/2002]  Is there anyone out there who works or had worked for the Metropolitan College of New York, formerly known as the Audrey Cohen College?  If so, we would like to ask a few questions (totally confidential).  Please reply to Roland ( rolandsoong@centralparktc.org ).  Much appreciated.
   

• HAPPY HOLIDAYS AT THE ARMORY [12/22/2002]  Last week, Noah Perlis collected $107 from those present at the Armory and sent the following e-card to Ed Small:

Dear Ed:

Please convey to your Armory staff the full appreciation of the members of the Central Park Track Club for the wonderful job they do to make the Armory the best place in the world for our use and enjoyment. We wish all of you a most wonderful new year full of good health and good times (good times for us too!) and we hope all of you enjoy our goodies on Monday.

I asked Ed and Sharon what their choices were for our treat and they selected both 5 pizzas for lunch and also cakes and cookies I will have sent over from a gourmet bake shop opposite the hospital on Broadway and 167 - 168 St. It is set for this coming monday and they told their staff not to bring lunch if they want pizzas. They were very surprised and taken aback by our thoughtfulness and spirit - no one had ever done anything for them before in this way. Perhaps we can continue next year. Every one of our teammates who contributed, and there were over 20 of them, seemed very happy to do so, including many new faces I have never seen before.

Thank you for your support and encouragement to make this happen for them.

Happy holidays to you.

Regards,
Noah  

• SNOW FIELDS [12/22/2002]  Race times are sometimes misleading because conditions should be factored in (e.g. too hot, too cold, too wet, too slippery, too hilly, etc).  Ideally, photographic documentation should be available.  In the following photo, how much do you think the conditions cost Stacia Schlosser in the Erie Turkey Trot 5K?
   
  
   

• THE ASHES (TO BE CONTINUED) [12/22/2002]  From the Guardian: "Running out of personnel, excuses and, possibly, the will to live, England go to Melbourne in the sort of mental state that might have enveloped Scott when he fell short of the line in the Antarctic. All this way, and nothing to show but blisters and a bad press. Rarely can they have needed a win so badly.

  Whether history will treat Hussain as one of Britain's grand losers is too early to say. He has been his obdurate self, coping stoutly with cramp, the media and bruised fingers. He has given his bloodied squad what little encouragement a general has to offer an army who wake up each morning to find someone has stolen another cannon.

  And the captain does not have the luxury of even a dignified retreat. Melbourne and Sydney await. It is as if Napoleon, having been found out, were being invited back to a Russian winter for old times' sake. And then on to Waterloo for good measure."
   

• HOLIDAY 4 MILER WRAP-UP [12/22/2002]  The last NYRR race of the year is over and done with.  And on a bright note, because Yumi Ogita won the race (note: we are obliged to state that she is 41 years old).  It was a cold day, but it was perfect for running because there was no wind whatsoever.  With Yumi's win, our year-to-date individual road race wins now stand at 41, coincidentally won by someone who is 41 years old.  With nine days left in the year, we will not be able to match last year's 50, but so what?
   
  For our photo album of this race, we tried a new camera.  For today, we had not even read the manual and so we were guessing at how to operate it.  But even by our high standards, some of those photos came out popping lively.  Or should this be called the David Howard personal album?
    

• THURSDAY ROAD WORKOUT REPORT [12/19/2002]  The night before the Christmas-New Year week saw 34 people at the workout, not including the resident of the fastest baby carriage in the park.  What motivates people to break away from their office parties to run in the park?  We are clueless ...
   
  We always say, "Listen to your doctor!"  Apparently, Bola Awofeso believes that firmly: "According to my doctor, I have been running around the past few weeks with a slight tear of the hamstring muscle.  He told me to keep my running under 15 miles a week for now.  [pause for dramatic effect]  So here I am tonight, putting in the whole 15 miles for this week ..."
   
  In 1853, Horace Greeley said, "Go west, young man!"  One hundred and fifty years later, a Central Park Track Club runner heard the call and moved to Jersey City.  Perhaps some day he will be the founder of the Liberty Park Track Club.  But until then, he was back running with us in Central Park.  Is Jersey City where it is at?  Not quite, according to him.  "I was counting on having Josh Feldman as my running partner, but the guy has moved to Westchester ... yeah, I know you don't think that I can run at Josh's pace ... but I am sure that I can run with him if he is injured ..."
   
  For the distance runners, the Christmas-New Year workout schedule is as follows:
  - No workout on Tuesday (12/24) as the Armory is closed
  - Road workout on Thursday (12/26), 7pm, Daniel Webster statue
  - No workout on Tuesday (12/31) as the Armory is closed
  - Road workout on Thursday (1/2), 7pm, Daniel Webster statue
  You have the option of joining the middle-distance runners on Monday (12/23) and/or Monday (12/30) at 630pm.
    

• INAUGURAL WEBSITE AWARDS [12/18/2002]  We know that we did away with the fun awards at the official club party many years ago because they wasted too much time.  Here on the website, we have no qualms about wasting people's time.  So we have just issued a number of CPTC website awards to some very special people (and it could be you!).
   

• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT [12/18/2002]  
   
  To: Central Park Track Club
  From: Temporary Editor, Tuesday Night Workout Journal
  Re: incompetent reporter

  We had some trouble getting Mr. Bendich to submit his report in writing this week. He brushed us off, mumbling something about 'applications, finals, ants ants ants everywhere . . .'  Clearly, he was in no state to write. He did agree, however, to hold still long enough to tape this interview, which we have transcribed, hopefully with some degree of accuracy. [Note: We have taken the liberty of editing his comments, of course, for the sake of brevity, cogency, and decency.]

  Editor: How many people were at the workout last night?

  PB: Precisely thirty-nine, give or take.

  Editor: I see. Did you count us as one or two, given our split personality at the current moment?

  PB: [unintelligble, possible reference to old fable about boy who forgets to count himself and so concludes that he has drowned].

  Editor: Try and stay on the ball, Paul [here Bendich winces at our unintentional rhyme].  Did anything special happen before the running?

  PB: [in a surprisingly coherent moment] yes, Noah Perlis took up a collection for the Armory staff. Then Coach Tony Ruiz reported the end of the season finishes (1st Open Women, 1st Masters Men, a PR for Margeret Angell at the Kleinerman).

  Ed: Was our club admonished at all?

  PB: Yes.

  Ed.: For what cause and by whom?

  PB: By the microphone guy; we were oozing, manifest destiny style, into the area reserved for warmup.  We dasn't do that again.

  Ed.: Ok. When did the workout start?

  PB: At 8:21 and 35 seconds, approximately.

  Ed.: You used that type of joke already. Try and find some new material. Did anything of note occur during the workout itself?

  PB: Very likely, but we couldn't see anything due to the once again insane pace of the C group. This time, led by the metronomic Alayne Adams, it was at least consistently insane.

  Ed.: How about after the workout?

  PB: Well, apparently, there is an ad-hoc Pullitzer prize-winning history book club being formed. Talk to Christopher Price and Jesse Lansner about this (caveat: they may not know about the club yet, but please don't let that stop you).

  Ed.: Something funny happened on the train ride home. What was it?

  PB: I don't know what you're talking about . . .

  Ed.: Yes you do, remember the flyer?

  PB: How do you know about that?

  Ed.: Well, you saw it, and we share a pair of eyes, remember?

  PB: Right, Ok. so I saw this flyer which was a sure finalist for esoteric pun of the year award: "Re Transit Strike: Sic Transit Gloria Mundi."

  And with that, Mr. Bendich stumbled out of the office, refusing to say anything more. So we'll just have to run this copy, with our sincerest apologies to Hunter S. Thompson for any possible copyright infringement.

  Paul Bendich
  Temporary Editor
  Tuesday Night Workout Journal
   

• DALLAS WHITE ROCK [12/18/2002]  At last Sunday's Dallas White Rock Marathon, Gary McCraw completed his debut marathon in 2:59:28.  This sub-3 hour time puts him in 221st place in the all-time CPTC best list.  This is a good start, and probably a good educational experience (note: first half 1:22, second half 1:37).
   

• HOLIDAY SCHEDULE [12/18/2002]  During the Xmas/New Year holidays, the Armory will be closed on certain days.  Therefore, the middle-distance group will hold workouts on these days:  (Holiday schedule: Thurs 12/19; Mon 12/23; Thurs 12/26; Mon 12/30; Thurs 1/2).  The schedule for the road runners (coached by Tony Ruiz) will be announced later.
   

• NYRR CLUB CHAMPIONSHIPS FINAL STANDINGS [12/17/2002]  You can read the final standings at the top of our 2002 year-end results page.  You will also find Alan Ruben's famous spreadsheet that lists the people who scored in those designated races during the year. Our team depth is reflected by the fact that the lists contain 19 open men, 11 masters men, 11 open women and 10 masters women.  
   
  But these lists are always published with this note: " ... it does not reflect all those times our members diligently turned out for these scoring races and ended up out of the top 5 (for Men) or top 3 (for Women) but contributed in intangible ways - forcing their teammates to outkick them in the finishing stretch, pushing down scoring opponents from other teams and being part of a large presence to inspire everyone."  
    

• MAC SEASONS OPENER RESULTS [12/17/2002]  Be careful what you ask for!  Not sure if MAC will ever publish the race results, we ask people to tell us themsevles.  We got this note from Noah Perlis:

I ran 44.67 for the 300M and was first in the 55-59 year old category.  Unfortunately, there is no such category by MAC in the early meets, since they combine 50 to 59. In that age spread I was second.  I was also the only one or 2 in the 55-59 year old group. I was also 3rd in my heat which consisted of one in the 40-44 year old (Craig), another in the 50-54. and maybe one other 55-59, plus 3 others 60 and above.

It could probably be reported:

55-59 300m Noah Perlis 44.67 1st (even if others in my age group ran faster but were in a different heat?)
     or
50-59 300m Noah Perlis 44.67 2nd
     or
55 300m Noah Perlis 44.67 1st
     or
40-65 300m Noah Perlis 3rd

Then again, you could also take out the age grouping and not report the place. Then you would be statistically 100% accurate from any perspective, my deflated ego notwithstanding.

Happily still racing at 55, Noah.

Okay, so who ran what when ... ?

• MEMBER SPONSORS [12/17/2002]  When Peter Gambaccini recently wrote about our club, he wondered: "I'm not sure what the current criteria for newbies is, but when I came along, a runner had to be recommended by two people already in the CPTC fold."  These days, it is not an essential requirement to have two sponsors, although the application form still has the space for two sponsoring members to be written in.  One purpose is to reward the sponsors, as they will receive acknowlegement for bringing new (and interesting) people to us.  At the end of the year, the person with the most number of sponsored new members gives a membership fee waiver for the next year.  In 2002, Sid Howard was the top sponsor with six new members naming him.  The other purpose is to permit us to figure out whether someone is a serious applicant.  When we come down to it, we are not a pure social club and we do take running somewhat seriously.  Therefore, we need to make sure that the applicant understands full well what they are getting into.  Being already debriefed by a couple of people is therefore a good indicator.  An example might be someone recruited after a corporate challenge race by a fellow employee who is a team member. 
   
  Increasingly, in this age of the world wide web, there is another type of newcomer.  This might be someone who is new in town, has no connections, gets on the web, finds us through the club website and shows up at the workouts.  In the beginning, the person may not know anyone at all and we do not require him/her to name any sponsors as such.  Eventually, they will form lifelong friendships  There is also the more extreme case, as in the newcomer who introduced herself to the coach, "Hi, Tony.  You don't know me, but I have known you and your people for a long time.  I used to live in the Mid-west where I visit the CPTC website regularly.  I read your workouts and I do them on my own.  I just moved to New York City recently, and it is obvious that there is only one club that I should join ..."

WEEK OF DECEMBER 10 - DECEMBER 16, 2002

• HAPPY HOLIDAYS FOR THE ARMORY STAFF [12/16/2002]  At this Tuesday's workout Noah Perlis will be collecting contributions ($1 to $5) on behalf of CPTC, from members who wish to show their appreciation for the Armory staff.  Noah will buy and deliver a surprise holiday food treat to the Armory staff to say thank you for their efforts. It would be a thoughtful gesture to the 14 staff members, usually behind the scenes, who make it possible for us to enjoy the facility.
   

• MAC SEASON OPENER RESULTS [12/16/2002]  Once again, another MAC season begins and we don't have a clue what happened at the season opener.  So if you want to see results published, you better send them to us, as Craig Plummer as done.
   

• THE LEGEND OF MARGARET ANGELL [12/16/2002]  email #1: "The worst nightware scenario --- Margaret is only five seconds away from a PR and a win, but Sasha jumps out and picks a fight with her ...see photo ... whom will James Siegel side with?"
   
  P.S.  By the way, those Central Park Track Club best times are now dynamically updated in near-real-time.  Margaret is still in third place all-time at the 10K distance, but her new PR time is now entered.
   

• THE ASHES (INTERMISSION) [12/16/2002]  The fourth Test match will take place in late December in Melbourne, but Australia has already claimed the series by winning the first three of five Tests.  Meanwhile, there is a round-robin of one-day matches among Australia, England and Sri Lanka.  The regular Test matches may take as long as five days, and makes for occasional boring defensive spectacles.  In the one-day matches, if you bat first, you have to post as high a total as you can and if you bat last you know what total you have to chase, all of this happening within a fixed number of overs.  In other words, the one-day matches are tailor-made for excitement.  Unfortunately, there was no excitement as Australia beat England handily in the two one-day matches, winning by an innings and 48 runs.  Alas, the English tourist will get to play Sri Lanka next, who were just hammered by the Australian "A" team (that is, their seconds) even more comprehensively.
     

• DIRTY DUATHLON [12/16/2002]  Funny, but no trigeeks wrote to tell us that Tour de France champ Lance Armstrong just won the Dirty Duathlon, an off-road run-bike-run race in Smithville, Texas, near Austin.  And he won it on the last run too.  Next up, would you believe a cyclocross for Lance?
    

• JOE KLEINERMAN 10K WRAP-UP REPORT [12/15/2002]  Finally, the long year is over with the last scoring race of the year.  Here is what happened in the various divisions:
   
  The open women went in needing a seventh place finish to guarantee the championship.  They did in style with a 1-3-5 finish to win the race.  Margaret Angell won the race with a personal best of 35:49, also her first Central Park win.  At the personal level, this is a redemption after a stress fracture knocked her out of the last three scoring races.  Chief among those races was the New York City Marathon, and we are left to ponder if she could have qualified for the Olympic Marathon Trials with a sub-2:50 performance.  Perhaps just as exciting for her was the fact that her father Christopher ran this race and completed his first competitive event since he was a 17-year-old high schooler forty-one years ago.  The Angell family cheering squad was stationed at West 72nd Street near the Daniel Webster statue.  When Margaret ran by, her sister Elizabeth was screaming.  Some guy not with our team was running close to her and she explained to him, "That was my family" and the guy said, " ... as if I couldn't guess!"  When her dad came by, she threatened, "Now you've got no choice but to finish!"
   
  Alayne Adams was third overall in the race and first masters.  This cements her position as the best local masters (note: we consider Gordon Bakoulis to be the best local runner who happens to be a masters).  Before the race, Alayne explained that she was really not motivated to do this race.  This caused one of our injured and spectating runners to say, "Yeah ... I wish I could be as unmotivated as her!"  In fifth place overall in the race was Margaret Schotte, who apparently can change clothes on the run without losing time.
   
  Next year, the open women's scoring will go to four scorers instead of the three this year.  If this was in place today, we would have 1-3-5-8, still far ahead of any other team.  In eighth place overall and third masters was Yumi Ogita.
   
  This brings us to the subject of the women's masters.  We came into this race in third place.  Although we have not worked out the details, we believe that we fell to fourth place.  We had the first and third masters today, but our third runner was in 221st place.  On paper, we believe that we have the strongest local women's masters team --- including Alayne Adams, Yumi Ogita, Stacy Creamer and our latest star recruit to be named later.  Unfortunately, we do not have the depth, such as our 10-deep men's masters team.  So the trick is get all these runners in the same place at the same time.  For this race, our plans were thrown off by a slip on the ice and then a missed team code today (ah, there is a wonderfully ironic story here!).  So this was a pity, but so what?
   
  The open men went into this race four points behind West Side Runners.  The final result was Warren Street first, West Side Runners second and our team third.  The positions in this race are the same as the final championship positions, which we must take as fair justice.  It is true that we had several runners sidelined due to injuries, but we are just not strong enough to threaten the top two teams at the moment.  For this year-end race, we had three long-distance out-of-town runners (Steven Paddock and Graeme Reid from the United Kingdom and Isaya Okwiya from West Virginia).  It was very nice to see them, and a delight to know that they are still bonded to us.  Obviously, we cannot assume that our future is going to be built around people doing this for every race.  
   
  The masters men went into this race having already clinched the championship title.  So the outcome of this race had no material impact.  We are not competitive in the two veteran divisions.  A special noteworthy result is Claudia Malley, her first race for the club in years and we never even saw her!
    
  This was the last scoring race of the year.  The next race will not be until February 22 next year.  So rest well and come back with a re-dedicated sense of purpose.
    

• THE APPLES AMONG US [12/13/2002]  In Runner's World today, Peter Gambaccini writes about the good and bad apples among the Central Park Track Club people.
   

• THURSDAY NIGHT ROAD WORKOUT [12/13/2002]  'Tis the Thursday before the last scoring race of the year, and we have forty-one people showing up at the workout.  That is ordinarily considered too many people and not a good sign, because everyone should be resting for the big race.  But tonight was the occasion for the free equipment trial postponed from last week due to the snow.  So, for once, there was at least a group of us who wore something that was uniform.  We are not at liberty to discuss the fine technical points of the product, as they ought to be proprietary commercial information.  But we can report this comment, "Yes, they remind me of the bone-and-skull black-and-white Oakland Raider!  Just give me a football helmut and I'll be all set!"  We can also report that we have never seen more Central Park Track Club people heading into the bushes than tonight.  Of course, they were simply seeking some privacy to change into the new equipment, and not for the number one and number two reasons.
   
  We would like to talk tough all the way through to the Joe Kleinerman 10K and after.  Unfortunately, it would appear that our open men will be far from full strength due to a number of key injuries.  As we have said many times before, we really don't care if we finish first or twenty-ninth.  What we care about is that no semi-injured runner should feel forced to go out and risk further injury.  What we are already happy about is to have a couple of people fly in from the United Kingdom to rejoin us for this race.  Unfortunately, Steven Paddock is one of the injured ones, but he has already contributed to the team by calling out split times at the Tuesday track workout.  This may not be what he had in mind, but so what?  Graeme Reid is the other returnee, ready to lay his hands on the men's masters championship trophy, which unfortunately will not be handed out until NYRR Club Night next February, but so what?  Graeme is also motivated by the fact that he will almost surely beat James Siegel, who was already huffing and puffing after the first mile tonight due to a long absence.  Then, we have the big mystery --- will we get to see the great Toby Tanser in the race?  If so, this will be the first time since the marathon that Toby has run on the road.
   
  As for the open women, we did not see our top scorers this year (except for Audrey Kingsley, who has no concept of rest).  We hope that they will all be mean and hungry, ready to fight and claw for that seventh place finish in the race.  As for the masters women, we need THREE people to score.  Please, can we have THREE people?
    
  After receiving an excellent rating for his debut track workout report, Paul Bendich is already attempting to negotiate a per-word rate.  Well, maybe ... but then again maybe not ... or not while he is wearing those baggy orange-colored shorts over his tights ...  By the way, Chris Price is somewhat alarmed at being identified as a drug abuser.  We assured him that the word 'crack' in that workout report was used as a verb, not a noun.  He was hardly reassured, as he thinks that the next time someone wants to do a price check on crack at Google, this workout report will be the top-ranked result.  
   
  By the way, the weather forecast for Sunday has improved, with the rain/snow being delayed until Monday.  So there is every reason now to run this race.
    
  Special message to Nicholas (celui qui parle français):  Please email either Kevin Arlyck ( chillwizzard@mindspring.com ) or Stuart Calderwood ( stuart.xc@verizon.net ) as soon as possible.
    

• MORE BOOK SALES [12/13/2002]  Today's Amazon.com's report has the following titles sold to party (or parties) unknown:

The Paleo Diet: Lose Weight and Get Healthy by Eating the Food You Were Designed to Eat (by Loren Cordain)
Bruce Chatwin (by Nicholas Shakespeare)
Full Score (by Neville Cardus)
Professors as Writers (by Robert Boice)
Technique of School Sculpture (by Chaim Gross)

If this was a single individual buyer who purchased all five titles, then he/she is even weirder than us (as if that were possible).  The most interesting item is the book by Neville Cardus, who was the cricket AND music critic at the Manchester Guardian for many years.  Here is an extract from Full Score: 

I am rather at a loss to account for Trevor Bailey's 100 wickets taken in a season in which he scored 2011 runs, in 1959; because he spent so much time compiling, or secreting, his runs as bats-man. One day he stationed himself at the batting crease for several hours engaged in acquiring 50 odd runs. 

In my report of this somnambulistic innings, I wrote to the following effect: "Before he gathered together 20 runs, a newly-married couple could have left Heathrow and arrived in Lisbon, there to enjoy a honeymoon. By the time Bailey had congealed 50, this happily wedded pair could easily have settled down in a semi-detached house in Surbiton; and by the time his innings had gone to its close they conceivably might have been divorced." 

Nonetheless, Bailey was a character, not an adding-machine. He stonewalled passionately, inveterately; and where human passion is in action, there can be no evaporation of dull, anaesthetic air.

• CORRESPONDENCE FILE PART 2 [12/12/2002]
   
  John Prather: "Whoopee, you found Shula's result (note: see 12/10/2002 journal entry titled Correspondence File).  Find mine... not that I'm terribly proud of it."
   
  Website guy: "John, I can't find Jack!"
   
  John Prather: "Will you post that EXACT sentence on the club website?  Result is at www.runningmasters.net."
   

• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT [12/12/2002]  The long-awaited debut report from Paul Bendich:

We accepted this position with trepidation. For we feared that, like the oft-fantastical Mr. Soong, we would soon grow weary of the dry reportage of start-times and splits; and out of sheer boredom, our mind would be forced to invent bits of idle gossip. But, no. Our first session "behind the orange veil" has convinced us that yes, indeed, interesting things do occur at workouts, not just in Roland's mind.

Case in point: One Mr. Christopher Price was observed standing on one leg, shaking his head from side to side, while muttering violently: "Crack, dammit, crack!" After the workout was over, he was seen lying on the ground, holding his leg and alternately screaming and laughing. So apparently it, or perhaps he, cracked.

Second case in point: the ex-ex-patriate Steven Paddock rejoined the fold for an evening, gallantly serving as timer. But first he was spotted running warmup laps in bluejeans. Is this training method the secret behind the recent resurgence in British running?

But there was also a workout to run. Thirty-eight people (for those expecting pyrotechnics from your mathematically inclined reporter, may we point out that this number is written 1102 in ternary?) gathered round Coach Tony Ruiz to hear the team placement report going into the important 10K scoring race this weekend. The Open Women go into the Joe Kleinerman race with first place all but locked up. From Ruiz: "If you don't take first, don't come back!" Stacy Creamer pointed out that a seventh-place finish in the race would clinch first for the women. As for the men, Ruiz said that they were in third entering this weekend's race. After this pep talk, the actual running started at 8:15.

On paper, it was to be 8 X 600, run evenly (cough) at 5k (cough) pace. In truth, at least one group went out fast enough that Coach Ruiz had to issue a direct order to slow down, overriding this group's timer, who promptly yelled at the group to speed up. Somehow, the group managed to pull through the workout together. But at least one poor sod, who shall remain forever nameless, was so delirious that he walked outside still in his running clothes.

On the train ride home, we envisioned the next Armory workout, perhaps in the midst of a transit strike. Anyone up for a nice 8-mile warmup jog up to Washington Heights?

The grader's report:
[X]  Headcount
[X]  Start time
[X} Gossip
Rating: Excellent!

• CHRISTMAS SHOPPING SEASON [12/12/2002]  On this website, we have an affiliate account at Amazon.com.  Not surprisingly, we are the biggest shopper ourselves through this program.  So last night, we did some shopping and here is the list of purchases:

Andes (by Mario Vargas Llosa and Pablo Corral Vega)
Dirty Havana Trilogy (by Pedro Juan Gutierrez)
Statistical Matching: A Frequentist Theory, Practical Applications, and Alternative Bayesian Approaches (by Susanne Raessler)
Parting from Phantoms: Selected Writings 1990-1994 (by Christa Wolf)
Selected Prose and Drama (by Ingeborg Bachman)
Serengeti Lion: A Study of Predator-Prey Relations (by George B. Schaller)
Bruce Lee: Master Collection (DVD)
Advances in Knowledge Discovery and Data Mining (edited by Usama M. Fayyad, Gregory Piatetsky-Shapiro, Padhraic Smyth and Ramasamy Uthurusamy)
The Poems of Elizabeth Bishop and Songs (CD by Luciana Souza)
The Answer to Your Silence (by Luciana Souza)

The book on Data Mining is relevant, because that is exactly what Amazon.com does.  When a potential shopper looks up a book, Amazon.com will issue a list that says, "Other purchasers of this book have bought ... (list of books)."  Of course, their data mining software has no semantic understanding of the books.  Rather, this is just an program that races through the database to look for simultaneous sales.  This means that we are exactly the type of person who will cause great perplexity among future shoppers.  Our choices are fairly obscure so that we would be one of the fewer purchasers of these titles.  Imagine now that a technical geek trying to buy that Data Mining classic will be offered the Bruce Lee DVD, the ecologist major trying to find the classic book about the Serengeti lions will be offered a Brazilian rendition of the poems of Elizabeth Bishop, the statistician will be offered the Cuban novel of depravity, etc.

• WEEKEND RACES [12/11/2002]  The indoor track season opens with the MAC meet on Friday the thirteenth at the Armory.  Then the road season ends with the Joe Kleinerman 10K on Sunday in Central Park, after which the first 2003 scoring race will not take place until the Snowflake run in mid-February.  Indeed, the howling winds and pouring rain outside tonight do make us pine for the indoor.  We don't have to worry about the weather forecast for Friday since it is an indoor meet.  The weather forecast for Sunday says rain/snow.  It will be lovely ...
     

• RESIDUALS [12/11/2002]  The lawyer's most important rule in cross-examination is this: "Never ask a question whose answer you don't know."  This comes into play when someone challenges us to locate an unspecified race results of theirs.  In so doing, the risk is that we may dredge up all sorts of information, including some rather unexpected materials.  For example, yesterday Shula Sarner hinted at a Thanksgiving race and instead we found the slowest 10K that she has ever run.  Furthermore, the link on this item leads to pictures of her at a Hunter College seminar.  Next time, please ask yourself if you can afford to take the risk before you issue such a challenge. 
   

• CENTRAL PARK TRACK CLUB STEEPLECHASERS [12/11/2002]  TRIVIA QUIZ #21 includes a photo sequence of Robin Villa practicing the art of steeplechasing.  Please be mindful that the age of this photo means that she was negotiating the men's barricade since the women's event would not been introduced until many years later.
   
  
    
  There is another famous encounter between a Central Park Track Club runner and the steeplechase, which we will recount for you ...

RU once tried the steeplechase. The gun fired and the runners ran. They approach the first hurdle and...

Well, RU has only agreed to run this because his arm has been twisted. However, as he is a good 30" faster than the other guys in the flat 3000m, he figures that he'll merely run fast between the hurdles and take his time with the complicated bit. He was a little unsure about the mounting fatigue and jumping but...

So the very first hurdle RU positions himself at the back of the field. Y'know, just to avoid the pushing. The field jumps ... and RU can't get his leg high enough.  His hip hits the barrier, he has to loop back. This time he is less ambitious and just tries to step over the barrier. It can't be done.

On the fourth attempt, the small, but vocal, crowd is having a field day. They thought it was hilarious and were falling over each other in tears, which did not really help encourage RU. The field now had a 200m lead. And they were sailing out of sight, RU again sprinted at full speed towards the barrier - crash!

Things went worse and worse, RU would prefer that we end the story right now!

• FAST TIMES IN CENTRAL PARK [12/10/2002]  NYRR President/CEO Allan Steinfeld wrote in Runners World Today about running fast times in Central Park.  
   
  We are in agreement with his comments, as in our 10/26/2002 journal entry: "How tough is the Central Park course?  Everyone who has run in Central Park knows that it is a series of undulating hills, not terribly steep but unrelenting.  The fastest men's 10K inside Central Park is a 28 minute effort, although no one has come anywhere close in recent years.  But history has also shown that determination and competition can overcome any physical inconvenience.  Witness the Women's Mini-Marathon -- In 2001, Paula Radcliffe set the course record of 30:47 in a bold solo front-running effort.  In 2002, Asmae Leghzaoui ran the world best time of 30:29 after being pushed by Lornah Kiplagat to a 15:07 5K split."
    

• CORRESPONDENCE FILE [12/10/2002]  
   
  Shula Sarner: "You missed not one, but two CPTC-ers in the same race.  To make it easy, one of them was me, spot the other."
   
  Website guy: "I am clueless.  I had better not wait too long to find out.  Or, until I do, the website is going to be an Arsenal-bashing festival.  Yes, they did get beat convincingly by Manchester United last week, didn't they?"
   
  Shula Sarner: "Would you just like the answer, or a series of clues?  Since Arsenal aren't playing until this afternoon, we'll start with the series of clues.  Perhaps if they lose and you promise to be nice, you'll get the answer.  The answer is 'published' on the web, which is where I found my result.  The hint is this: there is a very promising highly-placed-in-the-marathon young male runner who happened to grow up in this pleasant Midwestern town a few doors away from my boyfriend with whom I participated in this race on Thanksgiving Day."
   
  Website guy: "I don't have the final answer yet.  Instead I've found a solution to a completely different problem.  In this other race in July 2002, someone named Shulamith Sarner ran a 10K in 1:17:03.  Don't I deserve the next hint?"
   
  Shula Sarner: "The Vail Hill Climb is officially the worst race I've ever run.  By the way, it was eight miles straight up and not a 10K.  If I'd eaten breakfast that morning, I'd have lost it three times on the 5,000 feet climb.  And the other runner that was in Thanksgiving race has also done the Vail Hill Climb before, but not this year.  Next hint: Too far west, mate!  Try some Thanksgiving races run by middle-American running organizations." 
   
  Website guy:  "Parkville Turkey Trail Trot 5K, November 28, 2002, Parkville, Missouri.  Michael Rymer and Shula Sarner.  Yes, I am a Google search genius!"
   
  Shula Sarner: "Well , I did think you were ever vigilant, but yes, with help, more than genius.  Inspired even." 
   
  Website guy: "Champions League result today: Arsenal 0, Valencia 0.  Arsenal (Shula's team) and Ajax (the top team from the orange country) are co-leaders in Group B with 4 points each.  AS Roma sits in the cellar with no points, as Michele Tagliati cries his eyes out.  And to be fair about Shula's time for the Vail Hill Climb, it was an 8 mile race that took place at 10,000 feet altitude."
   

• WINNING IS EVERYTHING AND NOTHING [12/10/2002]  
   
  Story #1 from Karl-Heinz Rummenigge, the captain of the 1986 German national team which had just lost the World Cup final to Diego Maradona's Argentina team: "The German Chancellor Helmut Kohl came into the locker room and we were damaged and hurt.  I was the captain, and he came to me and said: `Oh, Mr Rummenigge, the team was fantastic today, and you are a really good ambassador for our country'. And I said `F**k off, Chancellor!'  He said: `No really, you were very good.'  We were so devastated that I walked away.  He just did not understand our passion to win.  We didn't need to be told we were very good just then!"
   
  Story #2 from the book Brilliant Orange: The Neurotic Genius of Dutch Soccer: "'Winning is not the most important thing.  The most important thing is to play a good game.'  It is almost impossible to imagine an English Premiership manager ever saying such a thing.  (Or, needless to say, the equivalent in Germany, Italy or Spain.)  Nonetheless, these are the words of one of the Netherlands' most admired, intelligent and best-loved coaches, Foppe de Haan.  De Haan, who has spent fifteen years guiding the tiny Frisian club Heerenveen to a place among the elite of Dutch football, and then keeping them there, is no oddity.  The vast majority of Dutch coaches, players, journalists and fans feel exactly the same way.  Johan Cruyff struck a chord when he said during the 1998 World Cup that although his beautiful totaalvoetbal team had lost the 1974 final to the Germans, they had achieved a victory of a kind by playing football the world still talks about.  The Dutch look down upon the cynical defensive tactics of Italy, Spain, Argentina or Belgium.  The English are considered stupid.  And the 'ugly' (i.e. defensive, physically powerful and hard-running) Germany style is beneath contempt.  To win at all costs and by any means necessary is considered shameful and indecent."
   
  Follow-up question:  Why are the English considered stupid?
  Story #3:  After a defeat by Johan Cruyff's Ajax of Amsterdam, Bill Shankly came growling out of the Liverpool dressing room . "They were the most defensive team we've ever played!"  Ajax won 5-0.

WEEK OF DECEMBER 03 - DECEMBER 09, 2002
 

• HEAD COUNT [12/09/2002]  Since this is the end of the year, Sarah Gross can now make the report on membership.  
   
  For the year 2002, our roster increased by 60 new names: 
   
  Bethany Aquilina, Jeff Aronis, Nicole Billman, Kevin Booth, Roland Breitenberger, Laura Brill, Julie Buck, Glen Carnes, Maria Chale, Lawrence Chandler, Andrea Costella, Kate Crowley, Sean Fitzpatrick, Laura Ford, Alexandra Horowitz, Vito Iacoviello, Robert Jamieson, Guillaume Joly, Elizabeth Kaicher, John Kerner, Nicole Kikoski, Joseph Kozusko, Laura Lee Kozusko, Noah Lansner, Harry Lichenstein, Bob Lingner, Eugene Lingner, Christian Lowe, Nick Mahedy, Kevin Maher, Vram Malek, Adam Manewell, Frank McConville, Gary McCraw, Andy Merrifield, Kira Morser, Heidi Newell, Okai-Tettea, Armando Oliveira, Emily Pierce Emah, John Prather, Jessica Reifer, George Robertson, John Rock, Tom Rodman, Peter Rodrigues, Jamie Rosen, Ali Rosenthal, Aaron Russell, Anna Sank, Stacia Schlosser, Ken Shatzer, Gabe Sherman, Marion Smit, Mark Sowa, Jim Sutton, Marissa Tiamfook, David Walsh, Mel Washington, Brad Weiss.
   
  So now you know why oldtimers are asking, "Who are these people?  How come I don't know anyone here anymore?"  
   
  On the other side of the ledger, there are the sponsors for these new members.  Having a sponsor is not compulsory to the process, and the new membership application may include none, one, two or even more sponsors.  On the application forms of these 60 new members, a total of 69 sponsors were named.  The names and tallies for the sponsors are published in our scoreboard.  
   
  First, the overall recruitment champion is Sid Howard, with six points.  Tony Ruiz tied Sid, but the win is given to Sid because Tony is deemed to have the advantage of being the team coach who would be written in as the default.  Honorable mention goes to Margaret Angell with four points.  Otherwise, we have a wide distribution with many people introducing others.  Here are some observations:
   
  - Even though Candace Strobach and Scott Willett have not run a workout with us in years, they are still sending people to us.  
  - Three new recruits this year have recruited new members themselves: Andrea Costella, Kate Crowley and Joseph Kozusko
  - One former member of fifteen years returned:  Mel Washington
  - Two new recruits were nominees in the 2002 CPTC Awards:  Adam Manewell and John Prather
  - Three new recruits were winners in the 2002 CPTC Awards:  Armando Oliviera, Ali Rosenthal and Brad Weiss
   

• DETECTIVE WORK [12/09/2002]  Over here, we are self-proclaimed Google search geniuses.  One of our standard exercises is to conduct Google searches on our new members.  Last month's new member Frank McConville told us, "Unfortunately for you, I was a runner way before the World Wide Web was invented."  That is factually correct, but it is difficult to hide some illustrious feats.  So we will retrace our Google search results, which are admittedly incomplete but interesting all the same.
    
  We start with the Marty Celic 4 Mile Run at Staten Island on September 7th, 2002 where we found:
    
       Kimberly Mannen, 27:36.1 (6:54 min/mile), 91st place overall, 3rd F30-39
       Frank McConville, 27:36.7 (6:54 min/mile), 92nd place overall,  29th M30-39
     
  Ah, we thought --- yes, here is a guy who gets outkicked by our female 800m specialist.
     
  Then we found the Shelter Island 10K on June 8, 2002 where we read:
    
       Charles Stark, 41:38 (6:42 min/mile), 87th overall, 19th M40-49
       Frank McConville, 41:39 (6:43 min/mile), 88th overall, 26th M30-39
       Kim Mannen, 42:13 (6:48 min/mile), 95th overall, 4th F30-39
    
  Ah, we thought --- yes, here is a guy who gets outkicked by one of our senior citizens.  Indeed, the subject himself might have preferred to end right here.  In his own words, "I prefer to be known just as Kim Mannen's fiancé."  But unfortunately for him, the World Wide Web contains quite a bit of history, especially illustrious ones.  
   
  The first hint that we find is that Frank McConville is on the all-time CHSAA Boys Cross Country list at 12:45.6 over 2.5 miles in 1980 in 35th place.  That puts him behind the likes of Matt Centrowitz and John Gregorek but ahead of the likes of Tom Nohilly.  Frank would come back to run the same course in the Joe Maceda Alumni Race and win in 1985 (12:20), 1986 (13:02) and 1994 (13:18.3).  Next we found that Frank ran 24:13 on the US Naval Academy Cross Country course while competing for Georgetown University.  All his other times at Georgetown University are otherwise uncatalogued.  Next, we find that the Washington DC-based Running Enclave listed Frank McConville in their Hall of Fame for a 13:54.85 5000m.  All his other times with the Running Enclave are unknown to us.  Still, those known times are impressive times that would be among our team's best.
    
  After college, Frank came back to live in New York City.  He had the misfortune of living in Staten Island, which means that his race results were carefully monitored by the excellent SIrunning.com website (note: no other NYC borough has anything comparable).  From the all-time Staten Island road running records, we found the following:
   
       2 Mi. Frank McConville Parker House Run, NJ 9:18 1988 
       3 Mi. Frank McConville Marli Run, S.I. 14:16 1983 
       5K-3.1M Frank McConville Wall Street Run, NYC 14:41 1985 
       3.5 Mi. Frank McConville Corporate Challenge, NYC 16:03 1987
       13.1 Mi. Frank McConville Philadelphia Distance Run 1:05.21 1987
       26.2 Mi. Frank McConville New York City Marathon 2:22.05 1987
   
  According to SIrunning.com, Frank McConville is also the only Staten Island resident who has run under 25 minutes at the 5 mile Van Cortlandt Park course.
   
  What you see here are both the strength and weakness of the World Wide Web.  Its strength is that it may contain some fairly obscure facts (such as the list of best performers on the Naval Academy cross country course).  Its weakness is that it does not contain every possible fact.  At least, not yet.  Regardless, we can still catch meaningful glimpses of the runner Frank McConville.
   
  With such an illustrious record, what does Frank McConville expect to do?  More precisely, what else is left for him to do?  At this point, Frank is about to become a masters runner and that may serve as a personal impetus to get serious again.  For the team, any flash of his past brilliance would be tremendously helpful for our attempt to continue our string of masters team championships.  After all, we cannot count on the beaten, bruised and decrepit bodies of Alan Ruben, Stuart Calderwood and John Kenney to hold up indefinitely.  But we are joking, of course.  We are a no-pressure team for which the happiness of our team members is much more important than winning.  The reason that we bring up all this history is not to pressure anyone, but to make sure that the next time the guy tries to pass himself off as the fiancé, you would know better to shake your head and say, "No way!  I've read about you!  Now why don't you tell me how many Corporate Challenges you have won on zero training ...?"
   

• PHOTO SEQUENCING [12/09/2002]  Imagine that you are sitting at home, staying snug and warm while the artic wind is howling outside.  Then a stream of photos arrive through email for the Hot Chocolate 15K.  Great!  Our courageous volunteers (Bola Awofeso and Eugene Lingner) have braved the cold, and all we had to do is post the photos.   We looked at the photos and then we realized that we had a problem.  Since it was so cold outside, everyone was all bundled up and now it becomes a job and a half to identify the individuals.  Not to worry, because there were some easy ones (e.g. Alan Ruben in shorts and a head band; Dave Howard with a singlet and long pants; etc).  From there on, we referred to the race results and identify those mummified runners according to their finish times in sequence --- Peter Allen, Erik Schmitz, Joe Gravier, Gary McCraw, Larry King, Bob Lingner, Yves-Marc Courtines, Stacia Schlosser, etc.  We were aided by the fact that this was a two loop race and there were in fact multiple shots of the same people.  Fine, except there was an extra body after everyone was accounted for!  So what do you think happened ...?  No prizes for the correct answer.
   

• OUR APPRECIATION [12/09/2002]  With the publication of the Central Park Track Club all-time best lists, we are perhaps ready to address the issue why so many of the lists are dominated by entries from the 1980's.  For example, in the Club Championship distance of 5 miles, Toby Tanser ran his time in 2000 and the earliest time before that was in 1988.  Previously, we had offered the hypothesis that there were fundamental intergenerational differences in priorities.  We used the example that the 100-hour-work-week is incompatible with the 100 mile week.  Alas, that hypothesis is unverifiable, but it might serve as a good bait if all we want is to stir the pot for lack of excitement around here.
   
  The evidence is not overwhelming, either.  For the women, seven of the top ten 800m times were accomplished since 2000, and half of both the 1500m and mile times were accomplished since 2000.  Here, a different hypothesis would be that having a strong middle-distance program in place enabled all those athletes to get motivated, train hard and accomplish those times.
   
  The strongest countervailing piece of evidence comes from the women's open team.  Come this Saturday, they are expected to clinch the Club Championships.  This is certainly cause for celebration, but true celebration cannot begin until we appreciate what it took to get there.  Here, we will single out one individual as exemplary, but everybody else will have their own personal stories.  
   
  In 2002, the best performer award for the team went to Alayne Adams.  Out of ten scoring races this year, she was a scoring team member in eight of them (note: she was out of town on one and we have promised not to talk about the other one).  She led the team in four of those scoring races.  In two of those races, she was the overall race winner (Fred Lebow Cross Country 5K and Staten Island Half Marathon).  At the New York City Marathon, she was twenty-fourth overall, second masters overall, third overall local runner and first local masters.  The running bio is therefore exceptional.
   
  That running bio is all the more impressive when it is considered that she is 41 years old.  Alayne is the mother of three children (Theo, Charlotte and Rhya).  Professionally, she is on the faculty of the Mailman School of Public Health, Columbia University.  As such, her professional interests and accomplishments happened to be well-documented.  This is a formidable publishing record.
   
  Therefore, the case of Alayne Adams shows that it is absolutely possible to have a full family life, an active professional life AND a stellar running career.  She loved running enough to find time to train and to wake up early on Mother's Day to run a half marathon.  And so can you, if you want to.  On this Sunday at the Joe Kleinerman 10K, the celebration becomes sweeter as we appreciate the dedication and effort that made it possible.
   

• TRIVIA QUIZ #21 [12/08/2002]  What else to do on a weekend with very few race results?
    

• PHOTO COUNT [12/08/2002]  With the photo album for the Hot Chocolate 15K, we have now exceeded our traditional goal of covering one event per week on the average for this year.  We now have 53 photo albums year to date, with another big race coming up next weekend.  On the website, there are about 8500 jpg files and 250 gif files.  That is a very big number of image files, but they were compiled incrementally over several years by a number of people.  This week, the photos were taken by Bola Awofeso (transmitted by Stacy Creamer) and Eugene Lingner.
   
  With more than 8,500 photos, it is likely that most of our team members are represented multiple times.  We do not have a database for the photos.  If you are curious where you stand, you can go to our home page, go to the bottom of the page, run the Google search of your name 'within the Central Park Track Club website' and then click on 'images' to bring up the image files.  Unfortunately, Google does not know how to index unnamed photos, so you may find your name linked to some photos that are definitely not you  (example: we typed in the name of Alan Ruben and we got this picture among correct ones).
     

• HOT CHOCOLATE 15K WRAP-UP [12/07/2002]  In the first race of the winter season, the Central Park Track Club won both the men and open titles.  No surprise here because we are winter's team.  Special congratulations to Stacia Schlosser and Andrea Costella for their first winning team places, with surely many more to come at their age (just ask the third scoring member, Sylvie Kimché, how many medals she has ...  answer: "aleph nought" which stands for countably infinite in mathematics).  On the men's side, Alan Ruben finished in third place overall and, more prominently, ahead of Conor O'Driscoll and Jerry Macari..  There were no awards handed out because the overhead clock was turned off in consideration of the ice-slippery conditions.  But, of course, the big race is the one NEXT WEEK.
   

• THE PULLMAN TRANSCRIPT [12/07/2002]  In this interview by The Wall Street Journal, the interviewee's bio says: "Mr. Pullman's fast-start dedication, work ethic, and endurance to get these complex deals executed is personified by his passion for competitive running. A member of the elite Central Park Track Club and New York City Running Club, he is an All State Cross Country and Track runner known for setting a fast pace. He is also a perennial cross-country runner at the finest Van Cortlandt course in New York."
   

• SURVIVING THE OFF-SEASON [12/07/2002]  These winter running tips come from Toby Tanser, who has survived frosty days in Iceland and Sweden.  However, the tip about gluing sandpaper may come too late for the person who slipped while coming down a snow-laden Cat Hill yesterday.  But it looks like El Niño will be giving us a long and wild winter this year.
   

• LOCAL LINKS [12/07/2002]  Here are a couple of New York City websites that link to us.
   
  
   
  
  www.newyorkled.com 
    

• THE ASHES [12/07/2002]  Yes, we know the series is over already, but the tour continues.  This week, there was a one-day warm-up match between the English touring team and the team from the state of New South Wales.  This is an opportunity to try out new players in the line-up.  England batted first and were all out in an underachieving 209.  New South Wales raced to beat total with just two wickets lost.  The most impressive performance was Steve Waugh, who sealed the victory with 19 runs off the last four balls that he saw.  To be fair, it must be mentioned that the New South Wales team does include seven members of the Australian national team.
   

• THURSDAY NIGHT ROAD WORKOUT [12/06/2002]  It had been snowing all day today.  The original workout place was for one lower loop and one four mile loop.  The first loop was out of the question, as the roadway at the Seventh Avenue entrance was a shiny glassy surface more suitable for curling than running.  On a night like this, you can definitely expect your regular workout reporter to show up to count the true runners.  Indeed, he was the first person to arrive and he counted twenty-eight people when we set off, not including the baby carriage or the trio of Frank Schneiger, Carol Tyler and Harry Morales.  Stacia Schlosser was an early arrival, and she was accepting bets on over or under twenty people.  In time, she will learn that this is too low a number.  Historically, the lowest attendance figure is four people in the middle of a hurricane.  The second lowest number is fourteen people when there was one FOOT of ice on the ground.
   
  Present today at the workout is new dad Victor Osayi.  It is one of the odd effects of the World Wide Web to have reduced communications barriers.  So, if you want to find information about the Lagos (Nigeria) Road Runners Club, who do you write to?  Answer.
  
  The workout was reduced to a single four mile loop, and the sprint to the finish was won by the baby carriage, which outleaned Gordon Holmes and Paul Bendich (note: we bet that they have no idea that this was how they would get their names mentioned!).  Actually, only 16 people did any running as the weekend 15K racers were sent home.  Under these snowy conditions, even a couple of miles may leave your quads and hamstrings hurting like mad as you have to adapt your running form to the conditions.  
   
  Comment of the evening, "This is almost like running on sand.  But the problem is that I cannot feel my toes and that is not a good sign."
   
  The post-workout workout was the obligatory snowball fight.  A wry observation: "This is sorriest bunch of lousy-throwing runners that I have ever seen ..."
   
  We met a couple of new faces today.  One was an ultramarathoner who just ran the Knickerbocker 60K.  The other just completed the New York City Marathon, "Since I finished the marathon, that proves that I can get back to running again."  Hmmm ... we think that they will fit in just fine ...
   
  Speaking of ultramarathoners, Ramon Bermo's first attempted landed him in second place at the Knickerbocker 60K (7:16 min/mile pace).  
   
  Warning:  We hate to be a pain in the ass.  Really.  But we have to tell the runner who just received a cortisone shot in her butt that if she disobeys her doctor's orders to rest and sneaks out to run this weekend, then she can really get a pain in the ass ...
   
  All Clear Signal is Cleared:  We now have a new Tuesday track workout reporter signed up for the job.  Therefore, all those people who thought they would be safe will have to go into full alert again.  Our rookie reporter was given these key instructions: (1) Get the count of attendees; (2) Record the time when people actually start running; and (3) Find the scandals (whether they are true or not, as long as they are scandalous).  P.S.  B y the way, please make sure to note if the fire alarm went off at 9pm.
   
  Late breaking news:  After the workout, Stacy Creamer, Stuart Calderwood and Kieran McShane Calderwood were on their way home when they were stopped and interviewed by a Channel 2 newscamera crew about their reactions to Manhattan District Attorney Robert Morgenthau's decision to vacate the verdicts in the Central Park jogger case (see Famous Sayings #1456 for the quotes).   Of course, how could they not interview someone with the eye-catching orange jackets running in the white snow?  What they failed to show is the parting shot of them running away from the camera and the letters Central Park Track Club on the backs of their jackets.  (Note: We cannot comment on this case since one of the decision makers is a client of ours).  
     

• BEST 10 MILE TIME [12/06/2002]  The publication of these lists seemed to have pleased a certain segment of our readers, such as this person who has lots of time on hand and a photographic memory who told us: "The best 10 mile time for Yumi Ogita was listed at 1:02.  I remember distinctly that Yumi once ran a 10K one weekend and a 10 miler the next weekend, both in the park.  In the 10K, she ran just slower than 6:00 min/miles but her 10 miler was sub-6:00 minute average.  I was obviously quite perplexed at her faster pace over the longer distance.  When I asked her, she said, 'Oh, it is easier for me to hold that pace for 10 mile.'"  Indeed, we were able to confirm that Yumi does have a personal best of 59:40 in the 1994 Frostbite 10 miler.  So ... are you perplexed too?
   

• WEATHER REPORT [12/05/2002]  Forecast is snow all day on Thursday with accumulations of four to six inches in Central Park.  Will there be a workout?  Well, there is only one workout rule that is etched in stone --- the workout is cancelled in case of lightning.  This weather forecast does not mention lightning, so the workout is not cancelled.  Of course, the conditions may be pitiful (but not to the Icelander, Swede and Canadians on the team).  But this will be the occasion to record the list of true Central Park Track Club runners.
    

• CPTC BEST HALF MARATHON TIMES [12/05/2002]  This is the last installment of the best times that were compiled by Stuart Calderwood and Alan Ruben, with a couple of assists from their fact-checkers.  In looking at the lists for the 10 milers and half marathons, it should be clear that the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler and the Philadelphia Distance Run once figured prominently in our competitive schedule.  The paramount goal back then was to project a presence in the major regional races.  By comparison, the coverage of the team's progress in the club championships was rather under-reported in the old newsletters.  The present generation of Central Park Track Club runners has a different set of priorities because the times have changed.  The major regional races (e.g. the Philadelphia Distance Run and the New Haven 20K) are now dominated by the professional runners who follow the circuit.  Instead, our interests have turned back to the local scene and also to the team relays (Vermont Marathon Relay, Hood to Coast, Reach the Beach, etc).
    

• WHO IS GENE STACHA? [12/05/2002]  Who is the mystery man who perches at the top of the Central Park Track Club all-time best 5000m, 5 mile and 10000m performances?  The answer is provided by Peter Gambaccini.
    

• WEEKEND BIKE RIDES [12/05/2002]  Although it is bitterly cold outside, we still have our winter weekend biking program.  The schedule for the weekend will be posted at this page during the middle of the week.  This group ride is open to everybody, Central Park Track Club or not.
    

• ARMORY INDOOR TRACK [12/04/2002]  Anyone who wants to run in the Armory should send the check ($250 for 630pm session with the sprinters/middle distance group; $150 for the 800pm with the long distance group) & passport-sized photo directly to the Armory!  The address is the following address: The Armory Foundation P.O. Box 314 New York, NY  10032.  It takes 2-3 days for the Armory to process the ID once they have received the check & photo.  Do NOT harass them or call them to see if you're ID is ready.  Just show up 1 week after you have mailed the check & photo and your new ID will definitely be at the guard's desk. Any questions, please call Devon Martin-Sargent. 212 474-1764 or email DSargent@cravath.com 
   

• NYRR CLUB CHAMPIONSHIP STANDINGS [12/04/2002]  One month after the New York City Marathon, we finally see the updated standings.  There is one more race (Joe Kleinerman on December 15th) left that is worth double points (30 for first, 24 for second, 20 for third, 16 for fourth, 12 for fifth, 10 for sixth, 8 for seventh, 6 for eighth, 4 for ninth, 1 for any other team with the required number of finishers).
   
  OPEN MEN:  WS 151, WSX 132, CPTC 128, GNY 80.  We have clinched third place, and we still have a chance to move up to second.  The best attitude is to turn out in force, give our best effort and then we won't even worry about the team standings ...
   
  MASTERS MEN: CPTC 168, JSRC 120.  We have clinched first place, for the fourth year in a row.  Unfortunately, the state of our team is such that our masters cannot afford to ease up because they are also our open scorers.
   
  VETERAN MEN: CPTC is in fourteenth place.
   
  OPEN WOMEN:  CPTC 141, MCNY 118.  A seventh-place finish will clinch the championship, and we have not finished lower than third place this year.  But we have more pride than that, so we expect our team to turn out in force.  Besides, Margaret Angell probably has some personal point to prove ...  This is likely to be more of a victory parade than a death duel.  When was the last time that we won an open women's championship?  Actually, the old newsletters are uninformative because they did not seem to care too much about this series.  But we personally remember the identical circumstances have occurred in which the outcome was virtually decided before the last race of the year.  Since this sort of occasion may occur rarely, we urge all our women --- old, current and new --- to race this one for the memories.  And if it is not too cold afterwards, please hang around for a group photo.
   
  MASTERS WOMEN:  MCNY 133, GNY 128, CPTC 106, TRR 93.  Our team of Alayne Adams-Yumi Ogita-Kellie Quinones won the masters division in the New York City Marathon.  This puts us in a good position to hold on to that third place and a presence on the podium.  
   
  VETERAN WOMEN:  CPTC is in fourth place with no chance of making the podium (=top 3).  However, the team can take pride on having 2 firsts and 2 seconds this year.
   

• WELCOME NEW MEMBERS [12/04/2002]  New members accepted at the December 2nd CPTC exec board meeting are:
  - Kevin Booth
  - Alexandra Horowitz
  - Emily Pierce Emah
  - Stacia Schlosser
  - Jim Sutton
  - Mel Washington (returning member  1985 - 2000)
    
  Of our new members, Jim Sutton recently ran the USATF National Masters Cross-Country 5K, in which he was second place M70-74.  Stacia Schlosser has been racing herself back into shape in past few weeks, hoping to capture her UVA times.  Emily Pierce-Emah has race results from all around (including a photo at the Wears Valley 15K in Knoxville, TN).  But our favorite newcomer is Alix Horowitz, because she must be the first person for whom we can locate a running bio in addition to a professional curriculum vitae.  All three new women will contribute immediately to that already strong open women's team in the 800m-to-10K range and we dare think that we have a third women's DMR team in place now.
   
  Recruitment credits went to: Jim Aneshansley, Kate Crowley, Frank Handelman, Sid Howard, Audrey Kingsley, Jesse Lansner, Jerome O'Shaughnessy, Sue Pearsall, Tony Ruiz (no points), Larry Thraen.
   

• CPTC BEST 10 MILE TIMES [12/04/2002]  Today's release for the 10 mile distance.  Historically, this distance is important because it was run often in Central Park.  Basically, the 10 mile run is one time around the four mile inner loop and one time around the six mile outer loop, with the start and finish being the same place with nary a doubt about short/long courses.  For many years, this was the distance for the prestigious Trevira Twosome race.  Although Trevira discontinued their sponsorship, this twosome race continued to referred to as the Trevira (note: how is that for brand equity!?).  The Cherry Blossom race in Washington DC was the other regional race that was significant on our race calendar.
   
  We will leave it as a mystery as to why Rae Baymiller loves the Bobby Crim race in Flint, Michigan.  As for us, we find that impossible post-Michael Moore.
    

• TUESDAY TRACK WORKOUT REPORT [12/04/2002]  The only report here is that our regular reporter over the last several years will not be making the workouts this year.  This caused us to quote Elizabeth Bishop:
  
  LETTER TO N.Y.
  for Louise Crane
   
  In your next letter I wish you'd say
  where you are going and what you are doing;
  how are the plays, and after the plays
  what other pleasures you're pursuing:
   
  taking cabs in the middle of the night,
  driving as if to say your soul
  where the road goes round and round the park
  and the meter glares like a moral owl,
   
  and the trees look so queer and green
  standing alone in big black caves
  and suddenly you're in a different place
  where everything seems to happen in waves,
   
  and most of the jokes you just can't catch,
  like dirty words rubbed off a slate,
  and the songs are loud but somehow dim
  and it gets so terribly late,
   
  and coming out of the brownstone house
  to the gray sidewalk, the watered street,
  one side of the buildings rises with the sun
  like a glistening field of wheat.
   
  --- Wheat, not oats, dear.  I'm afraid
  if it's wheat it's none of your sowing,
  nevertheless I'd like to know
  what you are doing and where you are going.
  
  Our reporter tells us that this was due to work commitments that makes it highly unlikely that he can make it on most days.  So for the rest of you who thought that being reported on is a serious drawback, you can now sign up without fear.  
   
  As far as we can tell, our reporter is perfectly healthy, so this was not a matter of physical health.  He also assured us that this was not an economic issue, as he had donated his Armory dues to the CPTC subsidy fund to benefit people who can take better advantage of the opportunity.  However, deep down inside, we know that he has been suffering from a severe case of multiple personality disorder for some time.  This problem seems to be pervasive among the overstretched and undermanned running websites (of which we can name another one located in Yorkville) in this town, and must therefore be thought of as endemic with the working conditions.
   
  But does anyone else want the job as workout reporter?  It is there for the taking (and you can actually talk about running!).
   

• A NOTE OF APPRECIATION [12/04/2002]  Seeing that there were more than 100 registrants at the Armory already, we thought it is important to thank Devon Martin-Sargent who has dispensed advice and kept track of everybody's checks/photos in order to make sure that everything is ready for you.  It is really a lot of work to do.
    

• FAST PACE [12/04/2002]  This does not refer to fast running.  Instead, the subject is Brett Lee and his 95 mph fast ball.  In the third test of the current Ashes series between Australia and England, he tossed two noteworthy balls.  The first one hit English batsman Alex Tudor in the eye going right through the gap between the face guard and the helmet peak, causing blood to gush out and sending Tudor 'retired hurt' for multiple stitches in the hospital emergency room. The second one was a bouncer at the English tailender Steve Harmison, who was a bowler and not a threat at bat.  To understand what is going on, there is a Guardian interview with Lee one month ago.  Compared to baseball, the 'bean ball' is permissible and an integral part of cricket.  Brett Lee said, "Over the past 10 to 15 years there has been this notion of a fast bowlers' union, with our lot agreeing not to bounce each other etc, but I like to play my cricket very hard.  If I've got a bat in my hand, they should treat me like a batsman, even if it's at 8, 9 or 10.  If that means copping a few bouncers, that's the way it is. This is Test cricket, after all and you're playing for your country.  I expect to get bounced - and I hope they expect to get bounced when they face me.  They say fast bowlers aren't too bright. Well, I always reply: Who's the brightest, the guy bowling 160 kph, or the guy facing him?"
   
  In the lore of Australian cricket, Brett Lee is just a minor figure compared to the legendary Dennis Lillee and Jeff Thomson (usually known simply as Terror Tommo credited with saying ""Truthfully, I enjoy hitting a batsman more than getting him out. It doesn't worry me in the least to see a batsman hurt, rolling around screaming, blood on the pitch. I like to see blood on the pitch.") in the 1970s.  This archive article begins with "Lillee and Thomson were the fire and brimstone of fast bowlers. Like all the best practitioners of their craft they tested the very limits of an opponent's nerve and technique. Add to that 50,000 people chanting their names or "Kill. . . Kill. . . Kill'' as they ran into bowl and you begin to have a vague idea of the sort of terror gripping their opponents who had already been told by Ian Chappell in the most direct possible manner which part of their anatomy was about to be knocked off."  
   
  Then there is the legendary story: "There is a famous story of Lillee delivering a swinging yorker into the pads of an opening batsman and yelling an appeal. The batsman was plumb and the umpire gave him out. Lillee was surprised when the player didn't move but stood, propped on his bat, at the crease. ``Owzat,'' yelled Dennis again. ``That's out,'' shouted the umpire.   Still the batsman didn't move.  ''That's out, you Pommie *******,'' said Dennis. ''Now bugger off.''   Whereupon the batsman said: "I'd love to, Dennis, but I can't. You see, I think you've broken my bloody leg.'' And he had."
   

• COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT [12/04/2002] 
  Complaint: "Your website has too much stuff!"  
  Response: "How terrible!  You're really breaking our hearts ... NOT!"
   

• META-ANALYSIS [12/03/2002]  Scientifically conducted clinical studies consist of samples of people that are carefully selected for the purpose of drawing certain inferences about the population from which they came from.  Sample-based results are subject to the sampling error in the sense that different samples may yield somewhat different results, and therefore the result from a single study is not considered conclusive evidence one way or the way.  Instead, a clinical study is usually clearly described so that other teams of researchers can replicate the findings.  The total weight of the evidence becomes the results across a number of different studies.  The synthesis of these study results constitutes the field of meta-analysis.  We know this field very well because once upon a time, we were responsible for generating 13 million mini-studies and then synthesizing those results.  That may be a world record of some sorts, but who's keeping the score?
   
  Why are we telling you this?  Because the umpteenth study has just been announced about a linkage between biking and infertility among men: "The research suggests frequent jolts and vibration caused by biking over rough terrain may cause abnormalities, including small scars within the scrotum and impaired sperm production."  This one is a relatively small study of mountain bikers, but it is the cumulative weight of the evidence of all the studies that matter.  The net result is that all the non-bikers are smirking with the "I told you so" look while the bikers are rushing out to get the new and improved bike seats.
    

• CPTC BEST 10K TIMES [12/03/2002]  Today's release is for the 10K distance, which is one of the most frequently raced distances worldwide.  In our lists, we have included certain intermediate times that were achieved in longer races.  This leads to some unfathomable performances, such as Candace Strobach having a best 10K of 34:26 and a best 5K of 17:22.  Now matter how we slice that 10K, she must have gone faster than that 5K time in the first half or the second half or both halves.  Unfortunately, we do not know what that 5K split was.  
   
  Again, we remind you that these times were run while the athletes competed for the Central Park Track Club.  If we had opted for their lifetime bests (with or without us), then this list might be populated with names like Kate Crowley, Dermot Fitzpartrick, Frank McConville, Eric Boucher, Andy Merrifield, Nicholas van der Burg and so on.  And so how many of you even know who Dermot Fitzpatrick is?
   

• DATING ON THE RUN [12/03/2002]  The Running Times story by Gordon Bakoulis sketches the pre-romance relationship with Alan Ruben.  The full central story has yet to be told, but we will reproduce the front page story of the 1995 CPTC newsletter about the 1994 CPTC 'fun' awards:

Who can't sell a good-looking suit or a pair of Nikes?  And when the product is the Central Park Track Club, how can someone not be enticed by its sheer size, the diversity of its talents, the color of its uniforms and its prestigious past?  And, if nothing else, that we actually welcome indigent running personalities --- like Karel and Nathan --- to become members.

But our next winner has really failed the Club as one of its salespeople.  Picture our accomplished club, and one of our most accomplished male runners.  Picture him dating New York City's top female runner for over a year.  Picture him wooing, convincing, prodding, poking, cajoling her to join our ranks.  Picture George huddling with him over another Guinness late on a Thursday night, dispensing a different type of coaching advice.

But no, it's not to be.  Wish as we may, this ambassador to the club has failed to achieve the rank of salesman.  Even used car salesman.  So to mark our disappointment and perhaps get him to pick up a Dale Carnegie "How to Win Friends And Influence People" motivational tape, we present the Worst Salesmanship Skills Award to Alan Ruben.  

The story was continued in the Jan-Apr 1996 CPTC newsletter:

Olympic Marathon Trials Update: In the Women's Trials, most of you already know about our favorite groupie Gordon Bakoulis' race.  She ran a shining 2:39:08 for 20th place and announced, "I'm very happy."  Shortly after the trials, when Alan Ruben was certain that his favorite channel-changer was too tired to resist, he proposed to her.  So we're not really sure if her "I'm very happy" statement referred to the race, the man or both.

• ARMORY PHOTO ID LIST [12/03/2002]  As of 2:00pm today, the following late session (8:00pm) people will have their photo IDs at the front desk of the Armory tomorrow:
   
  Margaret Angell, Bethany Aquilina, Kevin Arlyck, Olivier Baillet, Paul Bendich, Jay Borok, Roland Breitenberger, Jonathan Cane, Glen Carnes, Andrea Costella, Stacy Creamer, Lauren Eckhart, Neeraj Engineer, Doron Fagelson, Shelley Farmer, Laura Ford, Stephanie Gould, Robert Holliday, Kevan Huston, Edward Kasparek, Joseph Kozusko, Laura Lee Kozusko, Jesse Lansner, Noah Lansner, Roger Liberman, Eugene Lingner, Robert Lingner, José Martinez, Frank Morton, Zeb Nelessen, Adam Newman, Derek O'Connor, Victor Osayi, Andrea Ostrowski, Kellie Quinones, Christopher Price, Peter Rodrigues, Alan Ruben, Dawn Schneider, Margaret Schotte, Gabriel Sherman, James Siegel, Gordon Streeter, Bob Summers, Joseph Tumbarello, Maureen Upton, Jeff Wilson 
   
  Coaches: Tony Ruiz, Stuart Calderwood
   
  Added on Monday morning 11am by special messenger delivery:
  Alayne Adams
  John Kenney
  Alison Rosenthal
  Kenneth Shatzer
  Frederick Trilli
  Philip Vasquez
  plus Craig Chilton for the early session.
   
  If your name is not on this list, then it is likely that you missed the filing deadline and you may have to wait until next week.  You will not be admitted unless you have a photo ID.  Even if you have not signed up yet, you can still do so but you may not be able to enter immediately.
   
  For everyone, and especially for those who have never run in the Armory, your first session is going to be tough.  Due to the dry air indoors, your throat will be dry, your lungs will be burning  and you may be coughing like mad.  So ease into it!  It will get easier later in the season.
   
  There are fifty-three names listed for the 8:00pm session and forty-six names listed in the middle-distance group.  If we add the sprinters, we will have more than 100 runners this year.  There will also be other clubs using the track as well.  So we recommend that you read the track rules carefully.
    
  The people in the early session (6:30pm) should have gotten their photo IDs already, since their season started a couple of weeks ago, with a couple of exceptions.  The Middle Distance group can check their workout page for their status.